Wonkette
- There’s blood in the streets of Miami after notoriously not gay Father Alberto “Woman Kisser” Cutié called the Catholics “a bunch of lame-ass wankstas” and then defected to the Episcopal Church, which the Episcopalians used as a ripe opportunity to say massively disrespectful things about the Pope. Afraid of another Catholic drive-by, Cutié now wears a slug vest over his festive vestments. [American Spectator]
- Conservatives are very open-minded about grammar and they’ll read just about anything, even conservative blogs. [Hot Air]
- Exit polls show Mahmoud Ahmadinejad won the Iran gubernatorial primary. Susan Boyle was runner-up, which really upset a lot of people. [Andrew Sullivan]
- There are seven types of stool, and Bill O’Reilly is a Type 4, “Like a sausage or snake, smooth and soft.” But what about the shit that comes from Bill’s enormous turd-mouth? Probably a Type 7, “Entirely liquid.” [Think Progress]
- Liz Cheney spanked Rumsfeld until he cried like a little nancy after meekly suggesting we “cut and run,” which is why we picked the winning strategy and secured a perimeter around the Ministry of Oil and let the rest of Iraq go to hell. [HuffPost]
Is there a video available of Liz topping Rumsfeld? I’m just curious… yes, that’s it.
Bill O’Reilly has the strategy and intelligence to win any talk show gasfest. If the arguing opponent spouts some logic and annoys O’Reilly, Bill just talks louder and over his foe, and wins the debate.
I’ve always said that Falafel Loofahfucker was full of shit. Now we have PROOF!
I guess Liz Cheney doesn’t have a choice. She’s force to do this parade of buffoonery or else it’sssssss…..BACK INTO THE MAN-SIZE SAFE.
I think the shit spewing from O’Reilly’s mouth is the Gobstopper type. You can wipe for hours but never completely remove it.
Episcopalians of the world unite! You have nothing to lose but your chains! (and maybe that subscription to ‘Rectums and Rectories Weekly’)
Anybody know where can I get a couple of those Bristol charts(poster-size) for my bathrooms?
Riley is awesome. That is all.
Liz Cheney: “We had this sense that one could go into a nation like Iraq and if you sort of either arrested or removed from office the top layer of leadership that other Iraqis would sort of rise up and take over. I don’t think we expected the population to be so traumatized.”
Magic doesn’t work? Who fuckin’ knew?
Gee Liz, the frickin’ State Department — whom you allegedly worked for — prepared a 10-volume report essentially titled “What To Do In Iraq After We Overthrow Saddam” that basically planned for the traumatized people not to rise up and take over afterwards, and how to run the damn country. You know what Rumsfeld and your daddy did with it? Threw it away. Now kindly go fuck yourself.
As Robin Williams once quipped about the Episcopal church, “All the pageantry, none of the guilt”.
Hey, I didn’t read that Hot Air story. What it say?
My eyes are burning from the ads at American Spectator. I forgot what a shitpile that place is.
“I don’t think we expected the population to be so traumatized.”
yeah, because, bombing the fuck out of a country from the sky and then tearing through said country from the south with tanks and machine guns blazing is the sort of normal, everyday kind of event that people just don’t pay any attention to, right?
When Wonkette finds an intern that can almost make me vomit, you know we have a keeper.
The Palins named their daughter after a STOOL CHART??
Who is this Liz Cheney and why does she insist on getting coverage? Is she planning on being Jenna’s VP in 2016? America is suffering from Cheney Fatigue.
Ahmadinejad must now face Sanjaya in a runoff.
Seconding/thirding/fourthing the Riley Luv.
I love the Waggaman!
I really hate Liz Cheney but she’s kinda, you know, cute. She dresses like a teen-aged prude and probably wears a chastity belt, but whatever. I’d still punch her in the face if I happened to walk past her in the street. None of that chivalry when it comes to families who shoot people in the face “accidentally.”
I guess it’s too much to ask of her interviewers to point out her baldfaced lies. As David Gregory once said when asked why the White House press corpse didn’t harangue Bush about his multitude of lies, “that’s not our job.”
The answer to what is the White House press corpse’ job is, of course, stenography.
PEE ESS: It’s just a fucking crime that this brilliant offering from Waggaman got only 19 comments. For shame on you all (excepting we who commented above.)
Finally, wonkette posts on Cheney’s Liz (not Les, that’s the other one). I always wondered who she was fucking in order to keep out of wonkette’s grasp. Now I know it ain’t Waggaman.