Wonkette
QUOTE OF THE DAY, OR HALF-HOUR: From insane wingnut Debbie Schlussel: “I can’t help but notice that the sole reason So-So (my very appropriate name for Sonia Sotomayor) was chosen as Barack Obama’s nominee for the U.S. Supreme Court is that she shares the life story of J-Lo, Jennifer Lopez.” The whole article is Required Reading. Song lyrics! [Debbie Schlussel via Balloon Juice]
So Barack Obama = Marc Anthony? Help me, I’m confused.
Like Pete Hogwallop says, “That don’t make no sense!”
I can’t help but notice that the life story of Debbie tits is exactly the same as two ten-pounds sacks of silica gel, minus the painful and expensive surgery (and probably the shape).
The pic in that article is confusing. Is she saying Sotomayor is the Unabomber, but with more bling?
Debbie does have a point here, though; Obama must have picked Sotomayor for her life story, since she has no relevant legal experience. He should have gone for someone who has been a federal judge for many years, and maybe was on law review at one of the top law schools in the country. Oh, wait a second…
So the new meme is that any hispanic person at all needs to have a two-syllable moniker?
Jennifer K. Lopez, the hard-charging intellectual legal whiz-kid who’s been thought of for a Court slot for the past ten years?
Or the fat, wise-cracking smart ass who nobody cares for but hates the modern world enough to get a job at a hack rag?
I won’t make a judgment till I see Sonia’s bootie.
The article is titled They All Look The Same To Me, right?
“Their story is basically the same, munus the body . . .” And the Yale Law degree. And the 20 years of high-level judicial experience.
So when Nino flipped us all off and told us that “its an Itialian thing,” what he meant is that he is really Tony Soprano? And since Clarence Thomas married a white woman, does that mean that he is really the family that lived upstairs from the Jeffersons?
Obviously I wasn’t thinking of the correct J. Lo but, hey, I’m doing my laundry and it’s hot here.
Blonde Dumbitchion
Red Zeppelin: Guess so. Maybe D-Schluss should have compared her to A-rod instead. After all she only got appointed because she is a hulking steroid freak.
In that case, Debbie’s nickname should be “D-Sch”. Fits her perfectly if you pronounce it right.
They both have brown vaginas!1!12345!!
My very appropriate nickname for Debbie Schlussel is Cunt-Cunt.
Yes, but only with a ball gag.
Pretty good. She managed to work in the name of one of the two latinos whose names she knows. Next week she’ll enumerate the many similarities between “So-So” and Speedy Gonzalez and how that hurts America.
Good God, who the fuck is she??? Never heard of her till just this minute. Just as well I guess.
JMP:
I respectfully disagree. The only point she has is her head.
hobospacejunkie:
I was thinking “Ho-Ho”
Is anyone else annoyed by the name ‘Ballon Juice?’ Strikes me as too clever by half, though nothing to lose sleep over. Ballons don’t have juice. Unless the name refers to a semem-filled condom, in which case the only necessary questions are Why? and What’s wrong with you?
I always think of the Bad News Bears when the wingnuts react to any of Obama’s appointees.
“Jews, spics, niggers, and now a girl?!”
Is D-Sch the slightly more attractive version of Mann Cuntler, or is she just K-Lo’s new girlfriend?
I can’t help but notice that Debbie Schlussel was chosen to represent the right wingers due to her similarity to the Aerosmith hit “Dude Looks Like a Lady.”
When will someone address the untold story of the affirmative action propelling any skinny chick with long hair into Conservative Wingnuttery Blog Fame? WAKE UP SHEEPLE.
PrairiePossum: Sometimes I think too much. Ho Ho is perfect.
Dave J.: No he’s Chris Judd.
hobospacejunkie: Win.
While the article itself is droll drivel, the comments are works of art! My favorite part is where DS leaves all-caps replies to comments that make less sense than the blog post itself; if, in fact, that is even possible.
Who the fuck is this vapid bitch, and why don’t her tits point in the same direction in her photo?
Every thread on J-Lo must include reference to Shep Smith’s amazingly hilarious on-air blooper. If you haven’t seen this one, it’s a treat.
Monsieur Grumpe: Nah, she has more of a point; namely, “tee-hee, isn’t my casual racism funny & cute?” No, D-Schu, it isn’t.
URGE TO KILL…RISING!
I can’t wait for the movie of Sotomayor’s life where J-Lo goes home, gets stoned, and then writes legal opinions while battling serial killers.
That picture makes her look very insecure about her cleavage.
Maybe we should take up a collection for lithium for every person who calls themselves “Conservative,” and “Pundit.” We knew they were having problems when they supported torture and wars for make believe WMDs. But now they are just being loony.
I’d hit it. What is it, though?
Yet another right-wing clown I can picture saying, “I don’t like seeing those people in my neighborhood without a leaf blower.”
That IS NOT racial trans…oh f╓Œkit, ╞»&·^$ this stupid blonde skank.
V572625694: Hold on…a Google image search forces me to withdraw that offer.
Where did that photo come from? Is her left breast really two inches lower than her right, or was the Photoshop tech going for pre-Renaissance perspective?
Yo, yo, and we thinks Schlussel wrote this crap ’cause she really wants to be known as
da Schlizzle!
da Schlizzle!
Yo, we got da Schlizzle in tha’ house, y’all!
Does anyone have any proof that William F. Buckley did not kill himself when he saw that Conservative thought was being shaped by people like Ms. Schlussel, Hannity, Limbaugh, The Corner, the WSJ’s editorial board, and all of the other’s with political Tourette’s that make up the intelligentsia of the right now days?
Wow, getting uppity and trying to defend your position in the comments section of your own blog… What is this twat, 8 years old? I’ve never heard of her before, but I’ll be coming back!!!
A new hate fuck!!!!!!!!!!
So,what we’ve learned from the wingnuts in the last week: All Puerto Rican (can I say that?) chicks are basically the same. And they’re all named Maria
binarian: You’re lucky. Normally, she’s spouting off racism against the Muslins (along with anger against non-bigots because we want to destroy America), but she has expanded her offensiveness at times.
What is wrong with people like this broad?? I am convinced that people on the right like this are becoming mentally deranged. The cognitive dissonance between the world as it is and the way they want it to be is just becoming too much for them.
rocktonsammy: I’m warning you: do your due diligence w/Google image search. I’d do Coulter first, if she were a woman. Or maybe even not.
It’s odd that, say, Paul Krugman doesn’t have to work his breasts into his home page to get people to read his blog. Odd in a good way, I guess.
Yeah … and there’s no way Debbie Schlussel got her gig just because she’s a skinny blonde bimbot, like an older drunker Elisabeth Hasselhoff, the kind of blowup doll that Conservatives crave! Nope. No Affirmative Action kinda thing going on *there* …
whiskey tango foxtrot: You mean “any skinny chick with long *blonde* hair” …
Who the fuck is Debbie Schlussel? Nevermind, I don’t care.
Who’s the plump trollop with the caked-on make up and the big mouth? What’s her rate ? $125/hr? full service? GFE?
V572625694: good advice.
http://www.sadlyno.com/archives/9685.html
Yeah, that whole Yale law degree, Appellate Court judge experience, etc, it all just a smoke screen so the Prez can get his rocks off thinking about how much SoSo looks, acts, and tastes like J-Lo!
Nothhing like a Puerto Rican with in a judges robe to turn a man with a law degree on!
What massive, incinerating stupidity.
Is this an excerpt from “Debbie Does Botox”?
So who did Sonia play in a movie since there hasn’t been a Chicana Supreme court justice yet much less one murdered by her fan club president, erm her law clerk?
Or did Sonia dance as a fly-clerk on “In Judging Color”?
I get so confused.
Missed opportunity. Obama should have nominated some bleach blonde “granddaughter of Holocaust survivors” princess with a spotty legal career and delusions of grandeur. THEN what would the esteemed and accomplished Ms. Schlussel have had to kvetch about?
V572625694:
Fucking Ann Coulter would be like fucking two enraged cats tied to a sandpaper-covered two-by-four.
As I believe I have mentioned before, I have met Judge Sotomayor socially.
But with all respect to Her Honor, her “booty” (judicial or otherwise) does not compare to that of Ms. Lopez.
To wit: http://media.photobucket.com/image/Jennifer%20Lopez/BrickCityShyne/JenniferLopezAss.jpg
To quote Associate Justice Clarence Thomas: Now, THAT is a BOOT-TAY worthy of this Court’s Judicial Notice!”
Justice Scalia: “You know, I think I just felt a bone of contention in my legal briefs.”
El Pinche: Did ya leave out the “.”?
$1.25 an hour? She might get that.
Tommmcatt: Very well put.
Debby Darling. Blow me and tell me the flavor. I’ll leave you $5 here on the sink on my way out.
Did I miss the part where Debbie and Megs do the hot lesbo thing? Cause I would pay to see that. Otherwise, not interested.
hobospacejunkie: agreed. to my disgust, I have heard of this skank before, and so I’m not surprised. It’s hard to imagine how much lower these schlock “types” (are they human? not sure) can go.
x111e7thst: Oh, you and your integrity. Keep your cash. This is the kind of skank that will let you open a house account.
nappyduggs: Where the house is the bathroom in the Exxon station by the Hunts Point Market.
I thought all those trolls typeing in all caps on Huff Post were 14 year old home schoolers, now I know they are Deb-S. So-So may have her fancy degrees at fancy schools and fancy accomplishments but Debbie Schlussel was a FINALIST for a 2005 web award. So there. Also.
nappyduggs: Dammit, cranberry juice hurts like hell when snorted out of one’s nose whilst laughing. I’ll need to put vodka in it to ease the pain.
zenferret: doh! that’s right. I decimals.
El Pinche: ‘i hate decimals.’ I also hate blogs with no EDIT FUNCTIONS.
She’s definitely a 5-Cubic-Zirconia whore.
rocktonsammy: You are correct sir!
I would definitely fuck all of my angry hate out on that.
Does Debbie know that “Soso” was Joseph Stalin’s childhood nickname or something? Is she a crypto-Stalinist agent provocateur? This calls for a full investigation.
queeraselvis v 2.0: No she isn’t. Here’s the bitch without airbrushing.
http://www.mediamouse.org/features/photos/101807-debbie_schlussel.jpg
http://colorado.mediamatters.org/static/images/item/item_images/debbie-schlussel-item.jpg
http://mypetjawa.mu.nu/archives/debbieschlussel2.sized.jpg
She looks like a blonde Rachael Dratch without the saving grace of being funny.
Is it just me or does it seem funny-strange that some kind of conservative bimbette wannabe is depicted wearing teal tie-dye? Is this some kind of conservative idea of a haetfuck?
Also, she has a pretty mouth -
The Debster epitomizes the need for early intervention in mental health care.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Debbie_Schlussel
S.Luggo: Oy, Electra.
Debbie Schlussel is an ignorant schlut!
Add one more to The Captain’s list of creepy Republican wimminz.
Aloysius: You are correct. Her tits do indeed appear to point in different directions. Could she perhaps be the hideous result of some kind of bazaar accident in the secret laboratory of Darth Cheney?
Ebbie-day Chussel-say sounds jealous and vile. Time for her time-out.
Debbie doesn’t look like that pic anymore: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IX7iJiJb360
Thank you wonkette for introducing me to Debbie’s world. She is so stupid that even if they invented an affirmative action program for Coulter wannabes, she’d still be at the bottom of the class. I am so hoping for a Sarah/Debbie ticket in 2012 to finally put the Republican party out of its misery. In the meantime, I can visit Debbie’s blog and leave snarky comments along with the rest of the social network community that has arisen for no other purpose than to make fun of her.
snideinplainsight: She’s wearing teal tie-dye because that picture was taken 20 years ago.
I rest my case (thanks to Red5 … good lookin’ out!):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IX7iJiJb360