Wonkette
- NOT A BAD MOVE ACTUALLY: Former President George W. Bush missed both Obama and Cheney’s speeches today, because he was traveling to, let’s see, New Mexico, “where he is the keynote speaker Thursday night at a fund raising dinner for a scholarship program for students at Artesia High School.” [Political Ticker]
The only thing I like about Bush is that fact that he’s shut the fuck up after he left office.
Scarab: It’s weird, almost as if he has a conscience because he had the decorum and decency to shut the fuck up. But then, that makes no sense.
oh the places you’ll go, the people you’ll see.
really? Artesia High?
Movin’ on up…
He must enjoy not being president anymore — now when he’s not informed he can just plead ignorance rather than having to get someone to make an excuse for him.
I hear Artesia High is serving plates of sharp, heavy rocks for dinner, and this is likely to be the highest-grossing high school fundraiser ever.
Dear President Calderon:
We were wrong. You can have Texas and New Mexico back. And make sure to take that slackjawed, bush-clearing dingus with you. We’re sure his head would make a fine trophy in one of your fine Mexican jails. Apologies again for kicking your asses back in 1848.
Mucho love,
Barry O.
Will he read “My Pet Goat” to the students there?
Let’s see:
Cheney: Major policy speech today, “Torture or the Constitution: You Can’t Have Both People!”
Bush: Gives speech to Artesia High, “Lessons I Learned From My Pet Goat.”
Now who do you think was really running the country for the last eight years?
He was really on a peyote run for Laura.
Hooray For Anything: After 2001, the Secret Service takes great care not to allow a copy of “My Pet Goat” within five miles of Dubya.
I hope they give him an honorary degree.
Well, maybe now he’ll find out “is our children educated.”
Lionel Hutz Esq.: Sounds about right. Hopefully he’ll be the first ex-US President to end up hosting a show on CMT.
This is the first time I’ve heard about Bush giving a paid speech (assuming he’s being paid, since it’s a fundraiser, of course). And not that there’s any dignity missing in having a former President to offer a speech… I mean, I’d LOVE for Reagan to give a speech at my alma mater, but he’s dead. Anyway…
But here’s a QED: Why Bush? His articulation will only prove to the graduating seniors that four years of English doesn’t mean a fucking thing in the real world. For underclassmen, it’s proof that smoking by the cafeteria is as rewarding as Julius Caesar. That the glassy-eyed stare in their Guidance Counselor originated in eeking through an education degree.
Country Club Jihadi: DINGDINGDINGDINGDING
Dear Dick,
See, this is how ex-politicians should act or you could just die in some horribly painful manner.
Latter preferred.
Yes, I am hungry for a hamburger. Leave me and my double ‘cheese-style food product’ burger alone. I’m sure it’s all full of rat turds and murder, OK? HAPPY? HEENNGH?
Let’s hope that the ex-POTUSA dumbness is not contagious.
I don’t think Cheney is succeeding at improving the Bush administration’s legacy, but he is make Bush himself look better.
Also, it’s “The Pet Goat,” you Loyal Bushies/ignoramuses.
AHAHAHAHAHA Artesia High? FOR REAL? I have been to Artesia. It is the armpit of the country, assuming that armpit was shaved, and then got an ingrown hair, and then that ingrown hair got infected and started spewing pus. Pus and fluoride-related conspiracy theories.
Nice to see dubya pullin’ in the big speaking engagements. How much did he have to give to their cause to get the honor of speechifying for them?
Next, he’ll be the keynote speaker at the grand opening of the BigLots in Luling, Texas.
Chickensmack: WALNUTS! is in teh Wonkette reading ur post!
Brendan M.: You’re right, it is “the Pet Goat.” I guess Cheney is right and that I’ve forgotten the lessons of 9/11
Probably a good move that he decided to get the GED before it’s too late for him to make a contribution to society.
Brendan M.: No, the Pet Goat is definitely mine.
Georgie is going to change how history views him, one high school at a time.
God Speed, Mr. Ex-President.
The George W. Bush scholarship has finally answered the question, “is our children learning”.
Gold from the comments: “You liberal pukes are so funny and so predictable.”
-Dave the truth teller. Giving with one hand; taking away with the other.
Artesia is actually in part of the state that we New Mexicans call “Little Texas.” Even that part of the state, I might add, was lost by the Republicans in ‘08. Thank you Las Cruces!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahaha
Today we’re all Liberal Pukes.
“Artesta” High School?
Sounds unamerican. Kind of like Dijon and non-iceberg lettuce