Wonkette
- Gay marriage is not legal in New Hampshire after all, thanks to its House of Democrats who were all, ehh no thanks, apparently. [Reuters]
- Newt Gingrich has admitted to having “fantasies” about being the GOP nominee in 2012. Except: are these alleged fantasies a ploy to boost book sales, or do they perhaps relate to something sexual-like, involving his wife, a one Callista Gingrich? Maybe!/ew! [Daily Intel]
- Not to be outdone by Barack Obama, the President, Dick Cheney will also be giving a talk about National Security tomorrow, because… his standing as… current Vice President… presupposes his ability to influence policy… [Gawker]
- Eric Holder is not going to let Congress or whatever ruin Barry’s plans to close down Gitmo. [First Read]
Chicken-shit Dems is becoming the flavor of the day.
I can certainly understand why the Governor is so concerned about the possibility of clergy being forced to perform gay weddings; after all, look what happened to the Catholic church after they were forced to perform marriages for divorced people.
No legalized buttsecks in Manchester tonight. The Old Man of the Mountain haz a sad.
Newt can be a candidate once he gets tenure as a prof somewhere. And I think his fantasies all involve bodily fluids and flesh.
Did you see that pic of Newt’s wife? Definitely a gold digging harpy.
(David Souter turns around, heads back to D.C. muttering under his breath.)
Cheney should be giving a seminar on fence post installation at the Cody, Wy. Home Depot.
Sorry Newty Toot. No matter how many books you write, you will still be the Blow Job On a Desk Demanding, divorce your wife during cancer surgery doing, getting whipped by Slick Willie loser, and fake general who helped plan the biggest US military clusterfuck ever 300lb fatass Chickenhawk shill for Lockheed Martin.
Here is a suggestion: how about losing 100-200 lbs by 2012 and joining Delta Force? That makes more sense and more realistic than you being preznit.
19kevin8: I had no idea Newt married a 9/11 widow.
queeraselvis v 2.0: But isn’t all sex more sexciting when you’re breaking the laws of man and god? Seriously, the orgy-times in Knobgobbleton, NH tonight should be special.
Johnny Zhivago: Ruh oh.
They didn’t reject the whole bill, just the governor’s amendment — which means it goes through reconciliation and might well get vetoed, but that hasn’t happened yet. This, however, really confuses me:
State Representative Steve Vaillancourt, a gay Republican from Manchester, was a leading voice against the amendment securing religious liberties, saying that the House should not be “bullied” by the governor.
So to clarify: a gay Republican voted against an amendment that would’ve assured religious groups that they wouldn’t be forced to conduct gay marriages. Do “gay” and “Republican” have a different meaning in New Hampshire than everywhere else, ’cause this is loopy.
ManchuCandidate: How about forming a GOP “A” Team - Newt could be Hannibal, Michael Steel could be B.A. Barakus. Let’s see - Face could be Charlie Crist and the nutjob could be Jeb Bush.
Johnny Zhivago: That’s why he planned it — to get her hubby out of the way!
19kevin8: That’s some serious helmet hair.
After seeing Dick Cheney at work out of office, it’s pretty hard to believe the allegations that he meddled in CIA research when he wasn’t supposed to, isn’t it? C’mon, Dick — why are you so reticent when the world cries out for your wisdom and experience?
Oh wait — I know what’ll get him to shut up. A grand jury.
And I have fanatasies about Newt being tied naked, belly-side up, around the circumference of a large barrel and being roled and re-rolled and re-rolled through a bed of broken glass.
If we do not have dreams, how we can we be alive?
S.Luggo: how can we be alive?
Reuters: “Rhode Island, with its large Roman Catholic population, the region’s only hold-out [on teh ghey-marrying]“…
…but I’ll be if a priest could marry an altar-boy, little Rhodie would join the parade…
Callista was Nero’s third wife. He killed the first two by giving them cancer.
19kevin8: Good Gawd - she even *looks* like a bird-creature…
S.Luggo: a leaky barrel of lemon juice? soundtrack by Iggy Pop?
It’s a sad day for Republicans when someone as dumb as Newt is talked about as their next presidential candidate. The only people who will spend more than a dime running against Hopey (and all hope) are, by definition, the dumbest people on the planet. Voluntary sacrificial lambs, I believe they are called. And so Newt, apparently desiring to be a sacrificial lamb is, by definition, one of the dumbest people on the planet.
Also one of the fattest.
19kevin8: His wife is not only a gold-digging harpy, but also a fat-digging harpy. She must also like to be on top, if they do in fact have sex (eww.) Because the only way that fat fuck Newt can possibly have sex with a woman is if she climbs on top of him, possibly with the aid of one of those mechanical ladders the firefighters (god bless them and all first-responders) use. Amen.
hobospacejunkie: Why must you dwell,in such loving and graphic detail on these scenes of utter horror and desolation?
Harry Reid will turn a nice lady into a Kossack.
Bearbloke: Callista has that brittle, petite blond thing going for her that John McCain seems to find irresistable.
hobospacejunkie: I think I just threw up in my mouth after reading that.
x111e7thst: Hooray For Anything: YOU’RE WELCOME
Observe the shapes and relative positions of Vermont and New Hampshire. NH is clearly a “bottom”. They were probably worried that NH would have to gay marry VT.
How can Newt write a book about five principles when he’s never been anything but unprincipled?
Canuckledragger: Here’s a fun fact about Newt (excuse me if this is old news): his first wife was his high school geometry teacher, 7 years his senior. This is the same one he broached the subject of divorce with when she was recovering from cancer in the hospital. ‘Cause, I mean, her day couldn’t get any worse, so why not?
Newt/ Drew Peterson 2012
cheeto_jeebus: A waste of valuable vitamin C.
Newt should tumbled through gleaming, knifing shards of demijohn flasks of bulk white vinegar. Or smashed, puss-drenched junkie syringes. I say that only as a working hypothesis.
Iggy Pop in the background? No. The Fifth Dimension.
rocktonsammy: And Family Values.
I’ve got to say, Calista Flockhart aged pretty quickly after marrying Newt.
(Fun fact: Callista Gingrich is actually a year and a half younger than Calista Flockhart, while Harrison Ford is a year older than Newt Gingrich.)
“Callista Gingrich”?! Right. You’re making that one up, Wonkette.
It sounds like the name of a headmistress in some Roald Dahl short story….
Or a Death Eater.
Newt fantasies, lead to Newt porn, which even Chaney considers to be inhumane. What self respecting woman could climb on to that pile of satanic cellulite, and get horned up. Is there any Wonkette that would say about Newt, Yeah I’d hit that?