• February 14, 2012

You don't say.
So says the conservative online comedy hour, The Corner.

We’re going to get tired of the “Charlie Crist is a Queer” stuff fairly soon, probably, but for now let’s just enjoy the stupidity of the Republicans for dragging poor Charlie “One Foot In The Closet” Crist into the national gay joke arena. Florida is going to lose a pretty popular governor who really defines that whole “Republican In Name Only” stuff that makes fellow Floridian sex fraud Rush Limbaugh so excitable.

Or, Crist could just shut everybody up by saying, “Okay, sometimes I like dick. Sue me!” And that would be the end of it … except it wouldn’t, because then the wingnuts would come up with a proper wingnut GOP candidate: an actual child molester. [NRO The Corner]

{ 34 comments }

Noonan May 12, 2009 at 3:28 pm

“Leaky boat” makes me think of Olestra. Which is gross.

Custerwolf May 12, 2009 at 3:34 pm

Did you run out of blue highlighter or did you not think “premature” could be worked into a joke?

SayItWithWookies May 12, 2009 at 3:34 pm

When I think of Republicans, “old leaky holes” will come to mind.

zenferret May 12, 2009 at 3:35 pm

Did you just say “We’re going to get tired of the “Charlie Crist is a Queer” stuff fairy”?

Come here a minute May 12, 2009 at 3:38 pm

Crist will be happy to plug holes in Ohio, New Hampsire, North Carolina, Louisiana, Missouri, and Kentucky. Bring plenty of lube and something for his wife/beard to do.

gurukalehuru May 12, 2009 at 3:38 pm

I always thought he was a pluggee instead of a plugger, but what do I know?

Gopherit May 12, 2009 at 3:40 pm

Charlie should be allowed to plug as many holes as he wants to. Fuck those bigoted GOP fuckwads.

tootsieroll May 12, 2009 at 3:41 pm

How big of a plug do you think Rush will need?

Cape Clod May 12, 2009 at 3:42 pm

Crist has a large enough lead in polling that it appears that he might swallow the competition, stroking Republican hopes of holding onto the seat.

One Yield Regular May 12, 2009 at 3:42 pm

Now we just need Dan Savage to come along and craft a proper urban dictionary definition for “leaky boat.”

hobospacejunkie May 12, 2009 at 3:42 pm

So if CC admits to liking a little on the side the GOP is going to run Mark Foley? I don’t see how this helps matters.

19kevin8 May 12, 2009 at 3:46 pm

uck. this article gave me a horrifying mental image of Charlie Crist plugging Limbaugh.

The Cold Sea May 12, 2009 at 3:46 pm

CC likes to have adult dick, therefore, he’s not a true Republican.

StephanieInCA May 12, 2009 at 3:48 pm

poor charlie, nobody wants to teabag him.

Gorillionaire May 12, 2009 at 3:49 pm

Next on The Corner – spectacular color photos of Crist’s fabulous loft apartment!

proudgrampa May 12, 2009 at 3:49 pm

You cannot make this stuff up!

finallyhappy May 12, 2009 at 3:50 pm

Well, we could use an openly gay Republican senator.

TGY May 12, 2009 at 3:51 pm

[re=314689]finallyhappy[/re]: Log cabins will just build themselves.

queeraselvis v 2.0 May 12, 2009 at 3:51 pm

[re=314675]19kevin8[/re]: Oh HELL NO. Besides that, they’d both be fighting for bottom.

chascates May 12, 2009 at 3:54 pm

Awesome Charlie Crist paper doll here:
http://media.browardpalmbeach.com/2421135.0.pdf

Includes manly accessories for heterosexually appropriate candidate.

dg75 May 12, 2009 at 3:55 pm

Did we come up with that joke in high school and have been waiting 10 years to use it? Must be a proud moment for you.

dg75 May 12, 2009 at 3:56 pm

Did you come up with that joke in high school and have been waiting 10 years to use it? This must be a proud moment for you.

flyingspaghettimonster May 12, 2009 at 3:57 pm

justin timberlake basically said as much this week on SNL, and nothing bad has happened to him yet…

Custerwolf May 12, 2009 at 4:01 pm

[re=314712]dg75[/re]: Even after reading it twice, I still have no idea what you’re talking about.

assistant/atlas May 12, 2009 at 4:02 pm

This is awesome. Floridians will not only have a choice of sexualities and parties with their candidates, but they even get to choose their favorite skin color–black, brown or orange. (Meek, Rubio and Crist, respectively)

Truly a wondrous place, that Florida. Shame we let the old people take it over.

hobospacejunkie May 12, 2009 at 4:04 pm

Justin Timberlake is running for senator? What a world, what a world!

Country Club Jihadi May 12, 2009 at 4:04 pm

He’s a Repluglican.

lawrenceofthedesert May 12, 2009 at 4:07 pm

We lived through four boring terms of James “Big Jim” Thompson in Illinois, complete with lawyer wife and baby (though they were rarely seen together). I used to see him cruising Halsted Street in a convertible when I was out cycling, but not one reporter tried to out him the entire 16 years, much to the credit of the Fourth Estate. Jim knew how to sell a Senate seat! And to his credit, at the end he said that his biggest political achievement was carrying his Chicago precinct in all four elections despite being a Republican (of course), which told me he understood his business. As Important Hypocrisy goes, a pol camouflaging his sexuality is pretty much a misdemeanor compared to I Didn’t Really Go To College, My Business Partner’s in the Mafia or I Haven’t Paid Taxes in Years. Otoh, sex and farce are joined at the hip, so it’s a very funny misdemeanor when there’s a beard like Carole. Denial David Dreier-style: not so funny.

RoscoePColtraine May 12, 2009 at 4:16 pm

Crist plugging holes? Puh-leez, that girl! She’s such a bottom. Takes one to know one.

RoscoePColtraine May 12, 2009 at 4:21 pm

She could be plugging her own hole, however. Sphincter warranty has expired.

frumious_bandersnatch May 12, 2009 at 4:22 pm

You’d still have to take it a far piece to make it more homo-innuendo-laden than the most milquetoasty golf commentary. That shit is pr0n.

19kevin8 May 12, 2009 at 4:40 pm

[re=314712]dg75[/re]: Did we? You? What? We did? Oh! A-hahahahah…. haha haha ha…

19kevin8 May 12, 2009 at 4:43 pm

[re=314660]Cape Clod[/re]: “poling”

chascates May 12, 2009 at 4:54 pm

Odd but the http://www.charliecrist.com/ site has links that no longer work. Here’s a cached version from Google:
http://74.125.95.132/search?q=cache:6HepicZ1cJkJ:www.charliecrist.com/about_crist.php+%22charlie+crist%22&cd=5&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us&lr=lang_en

Looks like he’s going to have to run a very strict media access policy. You know how those snarky people are with their comments and such.

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