Wonkette
TWO FER … SATURDAY?
Will Obama Protect the Media From Pig Flu? [Politics Daily]
Flu Horror at the Target [True/Slant]
PANDEMIC PARTY
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You have been absolved of all your prior sins my child. That was goddamned beautiful.
SEXY KEN LAYNE!
are you a doctor? i’m very gassy and have had six beers but it hasn’t helped. is this hogitis?
cranky: You’re not speaking from a dumpster are you cranky?
Call me if you need me.
Custerwolf: dear god, if only 6 beers could do that to me. i’d have to hit like 20. i’m just gassy, with a little mouser’s elbow, is that pig-death?
cranky: Switch to hard liquor. Shit, I’m not even a doctor.
allainjules: Quoi?
Custerwolf: I could use something beautiful right now - it’s almost sundown on this cold grey fall day… the newspapers are full of stories about people worried about freezing this coming winter…
Is happy pig! Killing the pig germs - U R doin it wrong. It all begins with a ritual sacrifice performed by the Villagers, and then quickly rises to a feverish frenzy. During that maelstrom of nightmarish hallucinations Ann Althouse, Kathryn Lopez, Peggy Noonan and Pam Atlas first straddle their male victims until sexually satisfied, and then they decapitate the fellows. Then they do it to the pig, cook it and rub pork fat all over each other. Voila. The pig is dead, long live Sunday talk insanity.
[only one cup of coffee was harmed during the writing of this fiasco of failed snark]
Oh, good to read you work somewhere besides AOL. Also.
2druk2phluq: Just shut up and leave, dumbass.
Layne, you went home with “a case of wine.” Elitist! That is, unless it was MD 20/20 or some variant of that semi-consumable hobo juice.
What’s all this about some pig who flew?
No loony comments? Are they on to you?
(Is it wrong that the “Meet your Meat” ad makes me crave rare steak?)
I commented… IN FRENCH!
DemmeFatale: That’s a picture of a rare steak? I thought it was a lamb with its face chewed off, which of course made me hungry for moussaka.
cranky: Nah, I think you’re safe from the flu. Alcohol creates an inhospitable environment for pathalogical organisms - wait a minute, that doesn’t sound right -
2druk2phluq: I started to jump shorts’ ass for being rude to a newcomer, but then saw you were dumping on yourself so, okay.
allainjules: Je ne parle pas très bien francais.
FMA: Mad Dog? Jesus that shit ain’t cheap. Back when I was a teenager it cost me at least 20 or 30 million brain cells.
I want Obama to do it just because you mentioned a Sega Dreamcast. You know the way to my heart.
And remember, now that everyone’s mocking the press hysteria — it’s the second wave that kills. This current nonpocalypse is just recon.
The upside is that cockasians get to leave my messican ass alone.
All i need to do is sneeze at the crowded gym, and I have a 3 treadmill radius around me.
Thanks Beck ! Malkin!
DemmeFatale: Actually the picture of the two overweight, gay Iowains is a little more disturbing. Especially if you can imagine them having sex, which for some reason I’m having little trouble doing.
Bearbloke: Are you writing to us from the Future? If so, please look in the newspaper and tell me what happened to my Time Warner stock (TWX). Oops — sorry! — no newspapers?!
Cape Clod: Here, maybe this will help, Bearbloke posted this pic of them when they were younger.
http://i389.photobucket.com/albums/oo336/brontie2/gg.jpg
Kingbee: There is no Time in Space - that is to say there is no chronology that can be calibrated….
Bearbloke: Gravity creates friction. Friction creates time. Frictionless space has no time in it.
Bearbloke:
There is no chronology to be calibrated in deep space, as there are no people to have events happen to them. You’re saying that if a tree falls in the forest and there’s nobody there to hear it, it doesn’t make a sound. I vehemently disagree.
I also feel quite strongly that the egg preceded the chicken, and that any God who can’t create a stone so big that he can’t lift it is not truly worthy of the title of God.
gurukalehuru: “You’re saying that if a tree falls in the forest and there’s nobody there to hear it, it doesn’t make a sound. I vehemently disagree.”
If there’s no ear present to receive the vibrational waves nor a brain to translate those waves into a meaningful sound, then all a tree does when it falls is displace air.
Displaced air is just a sound wave that wasn’t heard. The universe does not depend upon our perception of it to exist.
gurukalehuru: Ahh…but you are not actually perceiving the Universe, you are misperceiving it. You only know your own world and without you, it’s nothing.
That pig picture creeps me the hell out.
Custerwolf: And displaced air creates patterns of changes in air pressure. What is a series of changes in air pressure? Go on….
The only confirmed case of pig flu in Minnesota is in Michelle Bachmann’s district.
I’m just pointing out that it’s an “interesting coincidence”.
My g/f is still pissed at me because I refused to buy saran wrap and duct tape back in 2001 when Tom Ridge declared the evil muslins were about to gas us. Now she’s pissed because I won’t get masks and hand sanitizer.
I say it’s because I have a death wish; she says I’m just too fucking lazy to get up from the computer and save us from imminent, terrible doom.
bago: Are we in fact aware of changes in air pressure? Or do we only remember such changes. And if we only remember the changes can we be sure these are real memories.
bago: A series of changes in air pressure are interpreted by our brains as sound waves.
x111e7thst: Interesting.
gurukalehuru:
There were eggs 100’s of millions of years before there ever was chickens. Also.
Sound is sound. No human/animal needed to perceive. Semantic garbage in Romantic garbage out.
(I did learn something in grad school, beyond all rumours)
Blender: If you’re girlfriend is unable to go out and buy her own masks and hand sanitizer, something tells me you’re lying about the duct tape and the saran wrap. I’m just sayin it sounds suspicious.
MGBYG: There’s no absolute called “sound.” We’re not talking semantics here, we’re talking science. What we call sound is actually vibrational waves traveling through space and eventually bouncing off the tympanic membrane in the human ear. Our brains, via the auditory nerve, interpret those VIBRATIONAL WAVES as “sound” meaning various pitches, rythms, etc.
MGBYG: “I did learn something in grad school…”
Well, then I reckon it’s a damn good thing I only made it through high school (and barely), because apparently you don’t learn much after that.
Oh - and did I happen to mention that without a human being there’s also no tree.
Custerwolf: I can’t believe that lazyass Blender won’t get the fuck up and buy some face masks and hand sanitizer but then I can’t believe his girlfriend doesn’t already have some hand sanitizer laying around somewhere if she’s that concerned. It sounds to me like someone wants to drive to the mall and someone else would rather stay at home. If I were the girlfriend I would threaten to order several cases of Anti-Swine Flu supplies over the internet and make him pay half. If I was Blender I would tell her that the masks keep you from giving other people the virus by blocking the cough spit and that three minutes of soap and water is actually more effective than hand sanitizer and then ask her to go to the store and get some beer and a roast chicken. Blender needs a more interesting pretend girl friend and I’m kinda hungry.
CNN’s home page is currently confusing President Obama with President Bush. So hard to tell the difference!
102415: Let’s do lunch.
PerhapsSo: They must have fixed it. I did notice a headline reporting that a Kentucky Derby fave had gotten scratched - which I think shows there is fact a growing sympathy for these racehorses, as they used to only make a big deal when they’d break a leg.
Custerwolf: The original headline was “Bush, Calderon huddle over flu” with the picture of Obama directly over it.
People just like the name of the horse: “I Want Revenge.”
Custerwolf: It gets worse. There are theoretical physicists who assert (with completely straight faces) that if “Matrix like” virtual universes are possible, then we are most likely “living” in one now. They even think there might be a way to tell. In a virtual universe the physical constants (C, the Planck Length etc) will just be really good approximations, i.e. repeated measurements of these will yield results whose difference cannot be explained by error or inadequacies in the instrumentation.
(I need to get out more)
Some lazy Saturday funniness.
As you were.
I am somewhat inclined to believe that all Kentucky Derby horse owners are oppressors, reactionaries and social parasites, and should be among the first to be sent to Obama’s reeducation camps. I could be wrong, however.
x111e7thst: While I don’t know a thing about theoretical physics, some of the ideas are useful - some not. I think simple conceptual physics is enough to boggle anyone’s mind if they’re really paying attention.
WadISay: No. No. I believe you may be on to something there. Most horse peope are complete freaks (I say this as a horse person, draw your own conclusions).
Custerwolf: and they don’t know how to type correctly. also.
x111e7thst: The only ‘Matrix-like’ universe I’d be intersted in is one where there were an infinite number of Keanus’. Nekked.
SmutBoffin: That’s why the majority of my high school years were spent out in the parking lot.
WadISay:
Well when you’re sitting back in your rose pink cadillac
Making bets on Kentucky Derby Day
Ah, I’ll be in my basement room with a needle and a spoon
And another girl to take my pain away
(As the poet said)
I’ll bring the Mike’s Lemonade.
http://www.boston.com/ae/celebrity/more_names/blog/2009/05/chelsea_clintons_vineyard_wedd.html?s_campaign=8315
Custerwolf: “Displaced air” is sound. Therefore the falling tree makes “sound” even if there’s no one there to hear it.
I highly recommend the box wine brand ‘Cube’ at Target. The Cab Sav/Shiraz blend.
WHEN WILL THE OBAMACALYPSE END?!?!?!?!?!?
Custerwolf: Any time. Call me if you are near the South East corner of East 4th street.I’ll treat.
x111e7thst: Theoretical physicists are unduly tempted to explain things in science fiction terms rather than more realistic ones. I’m not sure if it’s because they can’t help themselves or because some of ‘em don’t understand the concepts either. But the multiverse nonsense is just an outgrowth of that — hell it’s just a bunch of waveforms that don’t exist anymore, not the cascade of possible realities in some comic book plot. But that makes for a less exciting NOVA special.
Only very slightly multiverse related (addressing the question, is there a universe where a particular car doesn’t exist?) but this is pretty cool:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/lancashire/8030766.stm
102415: s’adeal.
V572625694: Sound is a subjective term. Ask a deaf person.
Custerwolf: On the other hand, I could take an entirely different angle and say there are different kinds of sound. Five to be exact. That’s a more interesting conversation.
SayItWithWookies: NO. FUCKING. WAY.
Hi, gang Just got up, 7:50 a.m. CET. I guess it all depends on your definition of sound. If we accept Custerwolf’s definition, then Custerwolf is right. If we accept the less poetic “sound is a wave of displaced air” definitition, then I’m right.
I’d like to hear more about these 5 different kinds of sound, though.
Custerwolf: ok, I’ll bite too. What about the 5 different kinds of sound.
Wonkette–the Physics Blog! Oh vey!
Wonkette–the Physics Blog! Oi vey!
x111e7thst: Well, I have to feed the dogs, so I’ll get back to you - but here they are:
1)The sound of your own voice.
2)Peripheral sound (the sound of your neighbor)
3)The sound of the echo (your ‘mind’) which is inaudible, but which is also the ‘biggest’ sound.
4)The sound of the Nature (birds, wind, water, etc.)
5)The sound of the Silence (which is not the absence of sound)
We walk through a world wrapped in sound (vibration), but we don’t realize it because we are stuck predominantly in the sound of our ever-churning ‘minds’. The answer isn’t meditation though. That’s a suppression of sound, only. Okay, my dogs are barkin.
Custerwolf: Thank you. An interesting division, but where do you place the sound of a beating heart, or the ticking of a clock?
Give the dogs a pat on the head for me.
gurukalehuru: The sound of a beating heart is the sound of the Nature - and also the first sound we were cut off from at birth (our mother’s heartbeat). The ticking of a clock would also be the Nature. I say “the” Nature - because to me Nature is an expression of forces. It’s not really a solidity, what we see as the “natural” world is the result of the play of elements, as are the skyscrapers in NYC. Nature is “the way of things,” what the Buddha called the Dharama and (Lao Tzu? I can’t remember.) called The Way. The echo is your mind - which doesn’t actually exist as a thing - and includes your constant internal dialog which was created from your past.
Custerwolf:
“The answer isn’t meditation though. That’s a suppression of sound, only”
Chen Man’ching said that an answer was to relax everything. And that the hardest thing to relax would be the desperate desire for relaxation.
Paradox is a bitch.
Custerwolf: “The sound of a beating heart is…the first sound we were cut off from at birth (our mother’s heartbeat).”
That is why the baby cries.
Reality is what it is (and has been), and nothing depends for its existance on human perception. Sound waves are sound waves. The opposite view is merely human-centric vanity.
Kingbee: How ironic - I would call your perception exactly that. You believe you perceive a sound wave. What makes you refuse to question its actual existence- simply because your human limitations say it is so - if not humanocentricism?
Oh, come on Ken…
When *don’t* children run away from you screaming?