• May 26, 2012
BASEMENT CREEPS

April 15, 2009

DNC To Coleman: Just Give Up

by Sara K. Smith  

Why so pouty?Possibly former senator Norm Coleman has fought valiantly for nearly half a year to secure a return ticket to Washington, DC, where he sleeps in an airless subterranean closet known as “the gimp chamber.” But he has lost his latest legal effort, and the Democratic National Committee is just rubbing salt in the wound.

“Enough is enough,” a female voice says in a new DNC radio ad that is set to begin airing in the Minneapolis/St. Paul area.

[...] The DNC ad encourages radio listeners to call Coleman – even providing his phone number — and tell him “to stop putting his political ambition ahead of what is right for Minnesota.”

Remember when Minnesota used to have fun politics, or at least fun politicians?

‘Enough is enough,’ DNC says of Coleman-Franken battle [Political Ticker]

{ 41 comments }

Terry April 15, 2009 at 10:14 am

I think he should give up on the recount and appeals and dedicate himself full time to becoming Sarah Palin’s VP candidate in the next Presidential election.

Monsieur Grumpe April 15, 2009 at 10:20 am

Go gracefully Norm. Find a bridge and take a jump. Just be sure and do right the first time. Because nothing is worse than a suicide chump.
RIPFZ

Crab1 April 15, 2009 at 10:22 am

What is a “Minnesota”?

SmutBoffin April 15, 2009 at 10:22 am

Perhaps the ex-senator sould embrace his status as a D-lister and join Blago in Costa Rica:

Blagojevich in Tentative Deal to Appear on NBC Reality Show

DagNabbit April 15, 2009 at 10:23 am

We built this city.

We built this city on Rock and Roll.

BillyClubb April 15, 2009 at 10:24 am

I actually feel for the guy. I had hair just like that when I was in high school and it hurts to lose — your hair.

Tommy Says Soooo, Jugdish! April 15, 2009 at 10:28 am

Today we are all the unemployed who aren’t relatives to the family outdoors fortune.

Noodle Salad April 15, 2009 at 10:31 am

Looking forward to seeing Mrs. Coleman’s hologram at the concession speech. Can they beam in an image of one of the Santorum kids, too, just for kicks?

magic titty April 15, 2009 at 10:32 am

They should play that Aimee Mann song from “Magnolia” in the background of the ad. . .

Mustang April 15, 2009 at 10:34 am

Don’t you hate that female voice that is the “voice of reason” on all the political ads?

ManchuCandidate April 15, 2009 at 10:36 am

For some reason Normie with hair reminds me of this:

And the sign said long haired sucky faced people need not apply
So I tucked my hair up under my hat and I went in to ask him why
He said you look like a fine corruptible young man, I’ll pay bills for you
So I took off my hat I said imagine that, huh, me bribed by you

woah!

Sign Sign everywhere a Sign
Dealing with Lizard People breaking my mind
Count this, don’t count that, I’ll just ignore all the signs

And the sign said anybody with fewer votes won’t be elected tonight
So I jumped on the fence and yelled at the Senate, Hey! what gives you the right
To put up a rule to keep me out or to seat my hated rival in
If Yaweh was here, he’d tell you to your face, man Norm’s some kinda Winner…

Sign Sign everywhere a Sign
Dealing with Lizard People breaking my mind
Count this, don’t count that, I’ll just ignore all the signs

Now, hey you Mister! can’t you read, you got to be Republican and lie to get a seat
You can’t even watch, no you can’t vote, you ain’t suppose to be here
Sign said you got to have win a stupid election to get inside Uh!

And the sign said only losers welcome, come in, kneel down and bend over
After Repubs whacked my ass with a paddle by the end of it all,
I didn’t have anything to say, so I got me a pen and a paper and I made up my own little sign
I said Fuck you lizard people for not electing me, I’ll see you in court assholes

Sign Sign everywhere a Sign
Dealing with Lizard People breaking my mind
Count this, don’t count that, I’ll just ignore all the signs

Internally valid April 15, 2009 at 10:37 am

Coleman, a career politician, was beaten by both a professional wrestler and a comedian. Now, his skills as a lawyer have been bested by that same comedian. Is there anything else he thinks he’s good at, cause maybe we can find a mime or something to beat him at that.

magic titty April 15, 2009 at 10:39 am

[re=289760]SmutBoffin[/re]: Christ.

Come here a minute April 15, 2009 at 10:40 am

Norm needs to give it up, so he can work as a consultant on the Jim Tedisco for Congress election stealing project.

Murphy Wins In Landslide, Unless Tedisco Does!

engulfedinflames April 15, 2009 at 10:43 am

norm used to be a dem. the opportunistic little bastard thought he knew which way the wind was blowing. his wife left him, his kids are assholes and he’s never seen a waitress he didn’t try to fuck. he’s an icky, icky nasty rotten oxygen thief. he can,however, chew through a log faster than a beaver.

bfstevie@yahoo.com April 15, 2009 at 10:44 am

Last blood of the revolution!

I’ve been saving this link for a time when it was good to celebrate what a douchebag Normy is.

http://www.citypages.com/2007-09-05/news/war-torn/

BillyClubb April 15, 2009 at 10:48 am

[re=289776]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Weird Al Yankovic?

Cape Clod April 15, 2009 at 10:49 am

[re=289757]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: Given that it is Minnesota, shouldn’t he just walk out to the middle of a bridge and simply wait for it to collapse?

Brendan M. April 15, 2009 at 10:57 am

[re=289792]Cape Clod[/re]: Too soon, bro. Besides, the stimulus package fixed all the bridges and stuff.

Plasmasmell April 15, 2009 at 11:15 am

The reason this is dragging on so long, to be honest, is because the official suicide bridge of Minneapolis is under construction (it was about to collapse, apparently!). Obviously Norm can’t kill himself until the Washington Ave Bridge opens up, because that is how we do it around these parts. So, blame Obama!

LittlePig April 15, 2009 at 11:23 am

[re=289776]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Some of your finest work. Bravo!

LaughingLark April 15, 2009 at 11:28 am

[re=289778]Internally valid[/re]: Your comment made my day. As much as I’d love to see Normy go away, I’d pay good money to see him defeated by a mime.

spymoose April 15, 2009 at 11:30 am

I’m confused. Isn’t that a photo of Ann “Cooter” Coulter?

proudgrampa April 15, 2009 at 11:41 am

[re=289776]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Wow.

WadISay April 15, 2009 at 11:42 am

This could go on for a while. It’s worth a lot to both Norm and Laurie not to have to live with each other.

hobospacejunkie April 15, 2009 at 11:43 am

Let’s not forget to thank mullet-haired governor Pawlenty, that ‘dignified’ new-style republican who McCain almost picked for VP candidate, who refuses to certify “Me, Al Franken.” Pawlenty is putting country first, just like all republicans. I say whoever loses the next round of lawyering gets bukkaked on national TV. And Pawlently should get bukkaked just for being (not having) a huge fucking dick and inexplicably, a media darling. Fuck them right in the ear.

Texan Bulldoggette April 15, 2009 at 11:53 am

Don’t worry, Norm. We still have Bachmann to represent your fine state. (Snicker, snicker…)

President Beeblebrox April 15, 2009 at 12:01 pm

Meanwhile, at of this morning, Scott Murphy is up by 168 votes over “Landslide” Tedisco in NY-20. That urban-suburban hip-hop off-the-wall strategy is doing wonders for both Coleman and Tedisco, amirite?

DeLand DeLakes April 15, 2009 at 12:12 pm

[re=289787]engulfedinflames[/re]: One of my BF’s coworkers went to elementary school with one of Coleman’s kids. When asked what he was like, she responded, “I don’t know, he was always in the nurse’s office crying.”
And just a minor correction, it was Coleman’s DAD who actually got caught fucking a waitress, in an alley. Also.

TeddyS April 15, 2009 at 12:14 pm

Some day soon, Norm, the wrath of Saturday Night Live will fall on your head. You make Al Franken look statesmanlike even before he is given the office.

rev_matt_y April 15, 2009 at 12:23 pm

[re=289778]Internally valid[/re]: Most appropriate would be for a mime to beat him in a debate.

erectiledisfunction April 15, 2009 at 12:34 pm

Once, I dressed up my dick with a long haired wig and it looked just like Norm Coleman.

Tommmcatt April 15, 2009 at 12:37 pm

[re=289792]Cape Clod[/re]:

Win, I say, win.

Tommmcatt April 15, 2009 at 12:37 pm

[re=289994]erectiledisfunction[/re]:

That’s odd. I did the same thing with my ass.

roolb April 15, 2009 at 1:22 pm

The photo’s great. Got one of Franken doing coke back on SNL?

Joey Ratz April 15, 2009 at 1:34 pm

[re=289764]BillyClubb[/re]: Yeah, me too. If Coleman had been blond, that pic’s not unlike me at 17. Of course, I’m bald now.

[re=289776]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Fantastic. I’m still waiting for that album.

[re=289790]BillyClubb[/re]: The original is by Five Man Electrical Band. I like the Tesla version myself: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0tu_4Y_b_w

LittlePinky82 April 15, 2009 at 1:56 pm

I remember when Coleman said that he wouldn’t go to the Courts cause he was winning. Now he’s losing he’s disenfranchising the people of Minnesota. That’s enough of a reason to kick him out of that seat. LOL at Coleman’s hair. He’s he a punk?

engulfedinflames April 15, 2009 at 2:01 pm

[re=289943]DeLand DeLakes[/re]: i didn’t know about his dad. i have a friend who was working at a quality restaurant and he was RELENTLESS in pursuing her. also there’s the story of drunken norm thrusting his tongue down local “t.v. personality” robyn williams throat.also

katrina April 15, 2009 at 3:03 pm

Nahm’s dad got caught with a sex worker in a parking lot. Nahm hisself goes after waitresses,
women shopping for grocery’s late at nite, and other “females” at parties in the western ‘burbs.
He wears nice suits, tho. Even ask the FBI.

Chuckie Jesus April 15, 2009 at 9:48 pm

Minnesota politics has sucked ever since they killed Wellstone. I say this as a Mpls transplant.

Ohio Wonkette Fan April 15, 2009 at 9:53 pm

Wow, Norm’s picture looks totally like he is a fag/bitch who is looking for a “wide stance” encounter at the Minnesota airport with the former punk/homo Repug Senator from Dakota; I bet he swallows

Comments on this entry are closed.

Previous post:

Next post: