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HAWT

Sexy New Portrait of First Lady Michelle Obama

Michelle makes America ashamed of its flabby-ass upper arms, again.The latest proof that George W. Bush is gone and Barack Obama is president and we didn’t all just imagine this, on drugs, is this new official White House portrait of first lady Michelle Obama. And CNN, our nation’s teevee news channel, has stories like this one: “How to get Michelle Obama’s toned arms.” Please gaze upon this official portrait respectfully, hands up where we can see them, as she is the first lady. [White House]


3:58 PM on Fri February 27 2009
By Ken Layne
7680 Views

  1. The Lucky Republican says at 4:01 pm, February 27th, 2009

    too late, Ken.

  2. ManchuCandidate says at 4:04 pm, February 27th, 2009

    I’d tap that.

  3. Jukesgrrl says at 4:04 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Her bottom half ain’t bad either.

  4. CrunchyKnee says at 4:05 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Pickles she aint.

  5. Fox n Fiends says at 4:05 pm, February 27th, 2009

    mmmmm toned

  6. SayItWithWookies says at 4:05 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Thomas Jefferson’s totally looking at her ass.

  7. “How to get Michelle Obama’s toned arms.”

    Um, I’m just going to take a guess…lift weights? WITH YOUR ARMS?

  8. masterdebater says at 4:07 pm, February 27th, 2009

    I refuse to sink to the bottom….until I’ve had some of that top.

  9. NoWireHangers says at 4:13 pm, February 27th, 2009

    She looks beautiful. Ugh, I’ve got SUCH A CRUSH on the whole family. And not in a SICK way you pervs. Well, maybe about Barry. Well, yes about Barry. Maybe about Michelle. Really, I think I just want to be adopted by them. I’m a Portuguese water dog you see.

  10. Sussemilch says at 4:13 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Don’t get her angry, you wouldn’t like her when she’s angry. Last Thursday she tore out the Taft bathtub with her bare hands and threatened to kill Joe Lieberman with it. She had to be subdued by a joint OP between the Secret Service and the National Park Service.

  11. Yes You Can Own A Piece of History says at 4:13 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Dave J.: Isn’t there some weight loss chocolate I can eat instead?

  12. magic titty says at 4:14 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Dave J.: Thank you. Jesus h.

  13. 2druk2phluq says at 4:14 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Beautiful, genuine, blessed by God… all ways to describe Michelle. I was going to compare her to the previous “lady” who lived in that house, but I felt doing so would be an affront to the wholesome woman who lives there right now. Michelle should never have to share a paragraph with Lizaura Bushenstein.

    The White House presence of Lizara, sometimes known as She Lizard, other times known as the Jokeress (because of her hideous death grin), had to be exorcised from the residence. It wasn’t so mucha physical residue she left behind as a spiritual grunge akin to the howling of damned spirits. Nobody knows what Lizara did in a past life that caused her to be permanently attached to the world’s most notorious chimpanzee. It had to be bad though, because living with Bush must be horrific.

    Michelle, unlike the gruesome thing that just vacated, causes bright colored little birds to gather and sing when she speaks. Flowers bloom as she walks by. Puffy little clouds in the sky seek to cast a light shade down upon her, lest the bright sun somehow discomfort her. Ms. Obama has arrived.

  14. arewethereyet says at 4:16 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Boiiiiiiiiiiiiggggggggg!!!!! uh…too late.

  15. BillyClubb says at 4:16 pm, February 27th, 2009

    “How to get Michelle Obama’s toned arms.” I’d like that AND the rest of her…

    Do you think she minds that she’s a FLILF (First Lady I’d Like to F**k)?

  16. Thanks. Thanks, CNN, for making us laugh at the MSM, once again.

  17. CARCUNTZ!(tm)-R-Us says at 4:21 pm, February 27th, 2009

    ManchuCandidate: I did hit it. Alone. At home. I’m ashamed.

  18. CARCUNTZ!(tm)-R-Us says at 4:22 pm, February 27th, 2009

    I had a hopegasm of a different type.

  19. chascates says at 4:23 pm, February 27th, 2009

    One classy lady. As opposed to the previous glazed-eye Stepford heifer.

  20. SayItWithWookies: Seriously, I can’t believe that wasn’t on purpose. We all know TJ likes the brown sugar, amiright?

  21. CARCUNTZ!(tm)-R-Us says at 4:26 pm, February 27th, 2009

    She looks like a really, really, really tan Vanna White. I can haz “U”?

  22. Doesn’t anyone think it’s messed up that she’s in front of the Jefferson portrait? Isn’t that just a little unfortunate?

    Also:
    http://muckbreaker.blogspot.com/2009/02/right-to-bare-arms.html

  23. Texan Bulldoggette says at 4:29 pm, February 27th, 2009

    That’s a really flattering picture of her around the hips, too, because she does have some junk in her trunk.

  24. HopeyDope says at 4:32 pm, February 27th, 2009

    I like that both of her eyes are looking in the same direction.

    ::pointing and laughing at Laura::

  25. Jean Hotman, Marquis de Villers-St-Paul says at 4:33 pm, February 27th, 2009

    BillyClubb: No. For example I have had the ILF feeling about several ladies before I even knew there was Michelle Obama.

  26. Doglessliberal says at 4:36 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Dave J.: YOu, sir, are not Amurrican, because Amurricans know that there is always a pill, drink, or machine that accomplishes these things for us because they say so in the ads on TEEVEE. Simple “work” and “eating right” are Communist propaganda.

  27. Tommy Says Soooo says at 4:37 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Turn around and play the back nine.

  28. Whacha your man gotta do with me? I gotta man. I’m not trying to hear that see.

  29. Wolfard:

    No. Jefferson only owned 15 slaves. She’s fine.

  30. El Pinche says at 4:50 pm, February 27th, 2009

    goddamn, our first lady is bangin’
    no wonder our barry is a confident man, he hits that every night.

  31. pondscum says at 4:57 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Why did they have to make that drape grow out of the back of her head? What shitass photog took this?!?!

  32. I mean, did we get an upgrade or did we get a motherfucking upgrade?

  33. El Pinche says at 5:12 pm, February 27th, 2009

    PumaBoomer55: “Look at her arms and how toned they are. It’s disgusting. It must be nice to have time to eat right and exercise and care about yourself all the time. Pampers has trained well. That misogynist pig makes me sick. I’m hungry. You gals wanna go to Golden Corral again!”

  34. assistant/atlas says at 5:13 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Can Michelle Obama snap any previous First Lady like a twig? Yes she can!

  35. The Helvetica Scenario says at 5:26 pm, February 27th, 2009

    That Jefferson is SYMBOLIC, yo.

    I dunno of what though.

  36. El Pinche: I can just picture the tearful, angry binge-eating that picture inspires throughout PUMA-land (including K. Lo).

  37. skyinator says at 5:35 pm, February 27th, 2009

    She’s gotta have toned arms to keep up with all that arm waving, hand-shaking, fist-bumping she’s required to do as First Babe.

  38. Texan Bulldoggette: Oh COME ON. That is how she is built- she has an ASS. She would have to starve herself to get rid of her butt. She is totally hot. That is all.

  39. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 5:48 pm, February 27th, 2009
  40. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 5:49 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Personally, I keep my upper arms toned using a picture of Michelle Obama.

  41. DoctorCulturae says at 5:51 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Jefferson in the background looking on is provocative, but also how about the lilium candidum next to her, Madonna/Mary/Miriam lilies?

    It’s an extraordinary shot of an extraordinary subject. Suck it Sarkozy.

  42. danadevin85 says at 5:57 pm, February 27th, 2009

    she looks beautiful

  43. pondscum: I agree but Michelle looks great so I’ll let it go. However, I still have issues with the “official” portrait of Barry because I have seen so many better shots of him.

  44. hobospacejungle says at 6:15 pm, February 27th, 2009

    MarSF: I think you & TX Bulldoggette are talking past each other. You are both expressing the same thing: admiration of the First Lady’s hot hot booty. Play nice, y’all.

  45. hobospacejungle: “Junk in the trunk” is a compliment? Really?

  46. danadevin85 says at 6:36 pm, February 27th, 2009

    yes it’s a compliment
    nothing wrong with a nice round azz
    an azz you can just squeeze all night long

  47. nosnikreplliw says at 6:40 pm, February 27th, 2009

    didn’t Tom Jefferson like the chocolate-fine ladies?

  48. BruceLee5000 says at 6:47 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Rush: He owned 15 and pwned at least 2 of them!

  49. BruceLee5000 says at 6:48 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Rush: CorrECTION: He owned 15 slaves and bwned at least 2 of them!

  50. Jukesgrrl says at 6:48 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Shuster says that’s Madison, not Jefferson. Who cares?

  51. BruceLee5000 says at 6:49 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Unsilly: BARRY WILL UPGRAAAAYDGE YA! UPA UPA UPA UPGRAYDRA!

  52. frumious_bandersnatch says at 6:59 pm, February 27th, 2009

    She could not be any more goddamn *~Fierce~* if she had a grey sparkly hat on. Also.

  53. No offense, Barry. But, I would totally motorboat that.

  54. assistant/atlas:
    Ah, how soon we have forgotten First Lady Florence Harding. (Notice the massive upper arms.)
    https://salempress.com/Store/images/editorial/harding.jpg

    Florence applies her vice-like grip in a handshake with the junior Republican senator from Nebraska:
    http://a.abcnews.com/images/Politics/ht_laddy_boy_070607_ssv.jpg

    She chose strength training over that terrorist, Hollywood-liberal Pilates crap.

  55. Mr Blifil says at 8:12 pm, February 27th, 2009

    All this attention to her arm tone is racist.

  56. During that Stevie Wonder/Gershwin Award thaing the other night you could see what appeared to be a giant portrait of Dolly Madison in the background behind Michelle Obama’s lovely face. And I’m thinkin’ to myself, sweet Cheezus, for the first time in my adult life I’m really proud of my country.

    Then I remembered that Dick Cheney was just VP for 8 years and the moment passed.

  57. Pat Pending says at 10:35 pm, February 27th, 2009

    This is the only area in which the MSM will NOT compare the new administration to Roosevelt’s. (No offense to Eleanor intended, of course.)

  58. DangerousLiberal says at 11:27 pm, February 27th, 2009

    danadevin85: MarSF:

    Even white boys gotta shout….

  59. NotthatLC says at 11:37 pm, February 27th, 2009

    Jukesgrrl: Shuster’s wrong, it’s Jefferson. I believe Mrs. Obama is making a funny by standing in front of his picture. Nice one, Michelle. Ironies abound when you’re a black woman living in the White House. Like just being a black woman living in the White House. Can’t WAIT to read her autobiography in ten years.

  60. danadevin85 says at 11:41 pm, February 27th, 2009

    DangerousLiberal:

    baby got back LOL

  61. otisfatboy says at 12:02 am, February 28th, 2009

    She is hot, natural, what a smile, knows exactly what is going on. Soo out of my league.

  62. SayItWithWookies: have truer words been spoken? he is there, somehow, checkin’ it.

  63. this is the first first lady i’ve been in love with since betty ford.

  64. also, I WANT TO GO THERE.

  65. El Pinche says at 2:17 am, February 28th, 2009

    S.Luggo: good god, my eyes just took a shit.

  66. thwanger: You weren’t transfixed with Betty when her Gerry was in office.

    Admiration for Betty Ford came after her husband left office and after her subsequent admission of her struggles with alcoholism and prescription drug abuse.

    No knock against her, but for her being a generation behind Betty, the same admission might have expected of poor Pat Nixon, ever waxed-face in every photo during her husband‘s era of presidential ambitions.

    And let’s no forget …, well, never mind. Tough being a First Lady.

    I’ve always admired J. Carter. No Misericordia ever, just dedication.

  67. El Pinche: The only way which I could have posted that without a feeling of hypocrisy is because Andrea Dworkin and Betty Friedan are with the angels.

  68. GreenHalo says at 3:33 am, February 28th, 2009

    Oh sweet Goat with a Thousand Young, this “First Lady = teh hawt” shit is NEVER going to stop. She’s conventionally attractive, okay? Really. Beauty is on the inside. That school girl who wrote a letter to Obama damn near died of fright when he started telling her story during his speech, and Michelle leaned over and gave her a big hug, like OMFG actual BODY CONTACT in the First Family, and actually got a little smile out of her as several thousand people were staring at her. Okay, that’s ten zillion Lifetime Partner Sweetie Diamonds right there, for real.

    BUT. If there’s going to be a popsicle-slurping, white-silk-blouse no-bra nipple-tweaking contest in the White House, we’re talking about Liz Kucinich and Dana Perino, period. Do you understand the difference between “hawt” and “fucking A, this woman highlights every single shortcoming Laura Bush ever displayed, and she makes it look effortless, what a lucky guy Barry is”? Yes? Well ACT LIKE IT please.

  69. Michelle has awakened me to benefits of sleeveless clothing. It doesn’t work so well to men though. America must get better advice on hair removal products. What does Michelle use?

  70. getoffmylawn says at 6:52 am, February 28th, 2009

    Best Co-President Ever.

  71. TexasCowGirl says at 6:34 pm, February 28th, 2009

    The Caliph Barack Hussein Obama is going to issue a fatwah on all of you for lusting after his wife. I predict much smighting at Wonkette. There will be wailing, nashing of teeth and much woe!

  72. arewethereyet says at 4:35 pm, March 1st, 2009

    ah…..First Babe……i like.

  73. gradgrind says at 8:33 pm, March 1st, 2009

    She could strangle Karl Rove with her bare hands and not break a nail. And he knows it.

  74. www.democratz.org says at 11:17 pm, March 1st, 2009

    In my view Most Democratic First Ladies really look sexy and the last several Republiklan first ladies look rather dowdy.

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