Wonkette
- THE ELECTION STARTS NOW: The GOP has confirmed that Lousiana child-governor Bobby Jindal will deliver the party’s response to Barack Obama’s fake “State of the Union” speech on February 24. Other finalists the GOP considered include Michael Steele, a vagina, and the Chinese guy who does John Boehner’s laundry. [AP]
The dude’s name is Piyush, not “Bobby”, so get your Hussein-loving shit together and call a spade a spade. Or a Magic Hindu.
Maybe he’ll pull a Jackie Sherrill on live TV and castrate a bull to fire up the Republican base.
Not a Hindu, an exorcism-loving papist.
Thank Christ! Piyush will restore the nation’s virginity!
And why shouldn’t Bobby Jindal deliver the party’s response to Barack Obama’s “State of the Union” speech? Bobby is still in that pre-teen phase of his life and thus much less likely to be a child molester and/or a closeted homosexual.
I need to see his BRITH CERTFICATE not STATMENT OF LIFE BRITH he is a MUZLIN BOURNE IN KENYA, INDJA and his mom was only 17 when he was BOUNRE so he is INELDGBLE for USA PREZIDENCY
I hope Jindal performs an excorcism as part of his response. Because that would be awesome.
A vagina can’t be the mouthpiece of the GOP. Because, well, you know.
brown people are magic.
Oh, I do hope the Republicans go on TV to warn us that deficits are bad.
It would be totally awesome rad if he did an exorcism on the teevee, like Benny Hinn.
“and the Chinese guy who does John Boehner’s laundry” - Judge Ito?
Deficits are bad link
Don’t know why it didn’t work the first time.
Hooray For Anything: Perhaps he will exorcise Amurica of it’s librul demons…HENGGGHH?
Thankfully, this won’t help his re-election bid much. None of Bobby’s Louisiana faithful will be paying attention, as February 24 is Mardi Gras.
Bruno: Dude, you gotta stop visiting the Confluence. You’re starting to sound like one of them, although I think they prefer FULL CAPS THROUGHOUT!
Hooray For Anything: Also, it is spooky that we both used the word awesome to describe an exorcism. Also.
Vagina? Silly GOP. All vaginas do (strictly in terms of GOP constituents, ladies [also, call me]) is terrify the women and bore the men, who are all gay or have secret pervert-furry rooms, or both, and hate gays, vagina touching, and getting caught with tentacle porn. I think republican females get bored with them too, though, fuck- take a look at Gobi-Desert-Malkin. They’re definitely terrified at other people’s vaginas. Maybe. Hmmm…
Shit. It seemed less complicated when I started writing.
Maybe Jindal should wear a vagina flag pin, just in case.
The GOP has already exhausted its supply of black people?
Many Republicans will tune in to the rebuttal just because they think it has to do with butts.
I wonder if this will reach the soaring heights of the last occasion when they tried to fight brown with brown–remember the green background on that stage in some shithole Louisana country club, Walnuts going full HENGGGHH?, and B.J. looking like he was there to bus the tables? I hope so.
Chicken shits!
Piyush’s stimulus package includes market-based indulgences and the construction of a spiritual border fence with Canada.
digibal235: yeah, he’s busy
Noodle Salad: also prayer-based foreclosure solutions.
So… the poster boy for the Republicans is a guy with no neck who named himself after Bobby Brady, advocates intelligent design, and earned his job by having FEMA kill all the poor people?
Please run against Obama. Pretty, pretty please.
It will only be worth watching if Obama declares the new axis of evil: Focus on the Family, Fox News and the GOP.
Maybe Jindal can be like the possessed girl in the Exorcist.
I’m hoping that his head will spin 360 degrees while screaming:
“Tax Cuts! Teh Gayz! Tax Cuts! Reagan! Ssssssssszzzt!”
Fortunately, Louisianans aren’t eligible to be president or for much of anything else but flashing their boobies at me, mrwar!
AfghanVet: The Fred Phelps/Westboro Baptist Church group should be in there too.
ManchuCandidate: And then fuck himself with a crucifix.
If he had one shred of decency, he’d say, “America, we are so very sorry”, and step away from the camera.
Piyush? More like P’Shaw! I won’t be happy until the GOP puts up an autistic lesbian rabbi in a wheelchair to deliver teh response, also.
Don’t be silly, vaginas can’t talk, they don’t have teeth. That’s a myth, right?
The timing of this is worrisome, as it is on Fat Tuesday. Perhaps they plan to declare that, for the good of the country, Louisiana will be expunged from the Union and Jindal is giving the United States permanent rights to our offshore fossil fuels in exchange for the Kingship. When he is coroneted we will all be too drunk to realize this isn’t just part of the Crew of Rex parade. This is because of David Vitter, isn’t it? Oh, well, I’m sure life will be fine in the third-world dictatorship of Louisianastan. We’re used to eating bugs, anyway.
Why not Sarah Palin? Isn’t she the future of the party? Oh, that’s right. The GOP has stopped exploiting idiotic women and is now exploiting idiot men of color.
The GOP is down with brown too!
http://democralypsenow.blogspot.com/2009/02/gop-hopes-to-prove-their-down-with.html
Judging from what I’ve heard from my Indian pals about their own families, I’m betting that Jindal’s candidacy will be destroyed by his mother, who will show up at every rally and stand at the front of the stage, weeping and wailing about little Piyush turning his back on Hinduism.
DeLand DeLakes: I think I remember that from an episode of Goodness Gracious Me.
The thing about this is that the Republican’ts don’t understand their own crazy wingnut base.
They think that they will love Bobby Jindal because he’s Jesus’s BFF and he hates the poors.
What they don’t understand is that the crazy wingnut base, outside of Louisiana and Illinois that is, hates the Catholics because they worship the Death Cookie. For srs.
And they also hate the Hindus because they go around killing Christians (in real human speak, some violent asshats use Hindu extremism as an excuse to kill their lower-caste neighbors who converted to Christianity mostly for the missionaries’ hot lunches, but in crazy wingnut Christianist world, it’s a SCARY WORLDWIDE HINDU JIHAD).
So Bobby Jindal, a Hindu turned Catholic, is certainly a loony God-botherer, but he’s the wrong kind of loony God-botherer and the Republican’ts don’t even know the difference.
Don’t tell them.
Piyush the Magic Hindu
Lived by the sea
and wallowed in the red meat base
in a land called fantasy
NoWireHangers: She’s busy helpin’ those those two kids work their butts off. Plus she has Alaska to run.
Plus.
“Other finalists the GOP considered include Michael Steele, a vagina, and the Chinese guy who does John Boehner’s laundry.”
I’d go with the vagina. But then, I always do.
Way prettier than Michael “Lexington” Steele and doesn’t leave starch all over you. [Most times.]
IceCreamEmpress: The hilarious and rich and terrible thing will be when their own anger about affirmative action leads them to start suspecting the competence of their own leaders…
Sussemilch: Pretty has nothing to do with Bobby Jindal. Apparently they have never been properly introduced.
In case Bobby Jindal doesn’t know, as a child Michelle Obama memorized all the lines to all the episodes of the Brady Bunch. I wonder what secrets Obama knows about Jindal.
The Futile Pandering award for leadership goes to … the GOP!
Sarah Palin is now rumored to be exploring radical pigment-augmentation treatments as she gets ready for her 2012 POTUS bid … hey, peeps, I can see the Russkies’ hood from my house! Alaska is teh shnizzit, yo! You betcha!
Is it time for me to reprise my classic, “Jindal Din”?
(The IDEA that this little wog would covet the Leadership of the Free World!)
Weird. I’ve always pictured a Chinaman doing Boehner’s laundry.