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TIVO THIS!

What? You people act like you've never seen a damn butterfly before.GAFFER TO MAKE REMARKS AT GAFFE FESTIVAL: Uh oh: “Vice President Joe Biden will attend the Special Olympics World Winter Games in Idaho on Thursday, the White House has confirmed.” He will deliver opening remarks, too, and we wish his staffers the best of luck trying to keep him on-script. (”Where I comes from, ’special’ means a goddamn different thing entirely,” etc.) [Idaho Statesman]


5:31 PM on Mon February 9 2009
By Jim Newell
944 Views

  1. OH, NOES!

    “I’m from the Gafferment and I’m here to help you.”

  2. Texan Bulldoggette says at 5:35 pm, February 9th, 2009

    Don’t forget where he exhorts the little Down Syndromers to ’stand up, look alert & don’t put the bread at the bottom of the grocery sack.’

  3. SayItWithWookies says at 5:35 pm, February 9th, 2009

    “I haven’t seen this many people who didn’t know the whole alphabet since the RNC convention. What?”

  4. This has got to be the punchline to an incredibly tasteless joke.

  5. Will he ask the wheelchair bound athletes to get up on their feet for a standing ovation?

  6. you cannot be serious says at 5:40 pm, February 9th, 2009

    Contain yourself, Joe! You won’t win the Oscar if you go full retard.

  7. BillyClubb says at 5:40 pm, February 9th, 2009

    This has to be some kind of White House prank.

  8. JeffGoldblum says at 5:46 pm, February 9th, 2009

    Don’t they know that retard jokes are like 80% of Biden’s stage act?

  9. This is a GOP/Rove conspiracy. A couple of taped remarks from his supporters at this event will turn away the ‘non-special’ voters for sure

  10. JeffGoldblum: And the remaining 20% is sexual harassment, which is why he is also being sent as a judge to the Miss Universe contest.

  11. What happened to Jim’s penis? It’s gone.

  12. frumious_bandersnatch says at 5:50 pm, February 9th, 2009

    I’m sure the athletes will be extra gracious and not call attention to his developmental issues.

  13. Coffee Clutcher 187 says at 5:50 pm, February 9th, 2009

    Brilliant! If the bank bailout/”stabilization” plan is roundly panned in the cable interwebs tomorrow and Wednesday, good ol’ Joe will swoop in with a doozy and take over at least a whole news cycle. These pesky WH folks are sneaky.

    It would make my week if he could somehow make a retard/butt secks joke in honor of Larry Craig.

  14. grevillea says at 5:51 pm, February 9th, 2009

    Wait, where’d that cock-graph post go? Some wonk-mafia types come round for a quiet word, Newell?

  15. The Unfairman says at 5:57 pm, February 9th, 2009

    SayItWithWookies:

    Win. Oh my God, fucking Win.

  16. WE WANT PEN15

  17. WhatTheHeck says at 6:06 pm, February 9th, 2009

    Special Winter Olympics?
    Its always Special winter olympics in Palin’s Alaska.

  18. The Borgen Project has some good info on the cost of addressing global poverty.

    $30 billion: Annual shortfall to end world hunger.
    $550 billion: U.S. Defense budget

  19. SayItWithWookies says at 6:09 pm, February 9th, 2009

    atsegga: What about the Millennium Goals, dammit?!

  20. gjdodger says at 6:13 pm, February 9th, 2009

    This is a test. They want to see if they’ve properly indoctrinated him so when he goes to Germany next week, he won’t comment on the size of Angela Merkel’s tits.

  21. Ladies and gentlemen, let’s give these amputees a big hand. And to those with speech impediments, I say, nyarg, nyarg, nyggg.

    (God, please don’t make me burn in hell forever for this.)

  22. shortsshortsshorts says at 6:14 pm, February 9th, 2009

    atsegga: You said that the other day! When will you understand that nobody cares about some starving statistic in Africa, unless they are edible?

  23. Dr Tobias Funke says at 6:18 pm, February 9th, 2009

    Opening remarks:
    JB: “This event reminds me a lot of the campaign, Barry and I had to spend alota time watching a few retards try and win! But seriously folks, Whats the difference between Sarah Palin’s mouth and her vag? Give up?!? Only 1/5 things that comes out of her mouth is retarded”

  24. grevillea says at 6:22 pm, February 9th, 2009

    Dr Tobias Funke: WIN!!1! [You did fuck up the joke on purpose, dincha?]

  25. JimNewell says at 6:52 pm, February 9th, 2009

    grevillea: Mustang: I am being moody. Blame it on… the Internet.

  26. mylesfromnowhere says at 7:19 pm, February 9th, 2009

    Wonder if Carlos Mencia will be his warm-up act?

  27. Tommmcatt says at 7:41 pm, February 9th, 2009

    I feel special. Mostly because I am one of the few that actually got to see Jim’s penis.

  28. CuntryFirst says at 8:24 pm, February 9th, 2009

    I get he’s attending, but will he or won’t he compete?

  29. tropaean says at 11:05 pm, February 9th, 2009

    i can count to potato!

  30. shortsshortsshorts says at 1:38 am, February 10th, 2009

    Jim Newell: Fuck you. Blame Trig.
    Trig’s an asshole anyway, at least most of the time.

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