Wonkette
- Proven untrustworthy Oath of Office-giver Joe Biden was sent to give the Oath of Office to Hillary Clinton. To no one on Earth’s surprise, he also sort of mocked this ceremony by giggling beforehand with reporters and the Clintons, again at the expense of Justice Roberts (the “Caroline Kennedy of Reading Properly.”) [Top of the Ticket]
- Oh Tom Daschle, you cad: Today is ironically the 96th birthday of when the government started collecting income tax! [RedState]
- Another Snow Day for DC school children. They will all spend the day writing letters to Barack Obama in the Washington Post, asking him to shake his Kenyan desert goddess statues for more precipitation. [Hit & Run]
- Obama’s stimulus bill contains secret preservatives that aim to fatten and hasten the ripening of America’s children. Meanwhile, Nancy Pelosi will wait patiently. [Politico]
- Bill O’Reilly has declared WAR on the New York Times after some editorial called his views on immigration those of “nativism.” But it was only after looking up the definition of “nativism” that he declared this war, for that was the final straw. [Crooks and Liars]
Another Snow Day for DC school children? Get some of that “flinty” Chicago attitude Barry was talking about last week and get to school.
Oh wait, an education doesn’t matter anymore — you’re going to be a hobo with or without all that book learnin’. Never mind.
And I thought Bill O’Reilly couldn’t get any louder or stupider. But I guess he’ll do both as fewer and fewer people listen to him. We’ll know he’s hit bottom when he’s begging Alan Colmes to come on his show.
What, Bill O’Reilly against nativism? But he’s a standard-bearer for the Know-Nothing Party, isn’t he?
Oh, wait. Never mind.
Women didn’t go to school in the Prophet’s (pbuh) time, so they don’t have to go to school these days.
Kids are getting fat because kickball, dodgeball, kill-the-guy, and other full-throttle activities are now banned, thanks to smother mothers that are hell-bent on removing anything they deem aggressive or exclusionary to protect their precious little children.
Joe Biden will have to sneak over to Hils’ place tonight and re-administer the oath for serious, after which Hillary will bust a cap in his ass.
Joe, srsly! Srsly, Joe!
A mockery! He’s making a mockery of government! A shamful shame. Er. A shameful sham! A ridic..ridic…complete fiasco!
God love him, he’s our VP of Snark.
Um, they’re complaing that the stimulus might dissuade schools from having gym class? How is getting beamed in the face with kickballs then having to change in front of your physically superior peers supposed to encourage weight loss? Only forced virginity can make kids lose weight, everyone knows that.
Will Bill O’s War on the New York Times be as successful as his War on France?
Servo: Don’t forget Smear the Queer.
SayItWithWookies: Is it really possible that everyone in the world agrees that O’Reilly is a foul racist dog (other than his cohorts on Fox who applaud his racism) but that he is unaware of it?
Time for an intervention. Time for O’Reilly to fully embrace the disgusting bit of rotting flesh that he is and celebrate it.
By Allah may the Times crush the great Satan O’Reily hijo de la gran puta
/illegal Latin Muslin overlord supplicant
“I could post that Andrew Rosenthal completely distorted Bill O’Reilly’s view on illegal immigration, because Rosenthal is a dishonest far-left zealot who uses hateful tactics, like implying people with whom he disagrees are racist. I could post that, and then you could Google “Rosenthal” and “illegal immigration” and it would be there — uncensored.”
So what we actually need are censors to protect right-thinking Americans from the dangerous Google.
Say what you want, but the LA Times headline for the Joe Biden story is classic and should be celebrated on this site:
Oath-muff mocker Joe Biden muffs Hillary Clinton’s oath
I love that “oath-muff mocker” phrase, it sounds like an epithet out of a gansta rap song; I’d buy that writer a drink.
hobospacejungle:
We called it “kill-the-guy” back in the early ’70s. Guaranteed pain, but endless fun. We couldn’t gain weight if we tried.
chascates: The best part of O’Reilly’s response is that it makes it painfully, hillariously clear that he has no idea whatsoever what YouTube is. Actually, the general GOP ignorance of them intertubes helps explain a lot of things, like Macaca or how WALNUTS! has “never changed any policy stances”.
hobospacejungle: Playing “Smear the Queer” in 4th grade brought three firsts for me: first time I ever remember sweating real hard, first time being viciously tackled by a girl, and the first time I remember laughing so hard my guts hurt. So damn much fun.
chascates: Actually the Google may be good. It’s one of the exhibitors at the vitally important Conservative Political Action Conference:
http://www.cpac.org/sponsors.html
BMW Direct is also a sponsor but that’s not very ‘Buy Americanish’.
when has o’reilly ever not been at war with the NYT?
How does this make any logical sense? From papa bear
“…the Times and other far-left entities favor amnesty for illegal aliens, primarily as a way to gain political power. As you may also know, most Americans reject blanket amnesty,…”
How would they gain political power if most americans reject the idea? The man is a genius, he doesn’t even need us to argue with him