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  • $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$: The House passed The Stimulus Package at a final cost of… $819 billion. Hooray for Obama Money! Time for every American to buy a mansion! Oh right, it still has to go through the Senate. Well hurry up you rich bastard Senators! FIX POTHOLE PLZ. [AP]
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70 COMMENTS

  1. Haven’t decided yet whether to spend mine on a new antique commode with legs, or to invest in the Iceland Kronur – currently 115 to the dollah.

  2. “On the final vote, the legislation drew overwhelming support among Democrats while all but a few Republicans opposed it.”

    Nice to see bipartisanship has returned to government.

  3. Every microbrewer in the adjacent three states just ran out to get the ermine mudflaps and platinum trucknutz for their Tundras, ’cause they heard I’m getting a stimulus check!

  4. Listen, the GOP ain’t going to vote for this thing no matter how many “concessions” Obamz makes. I say cram this fucker full of money for contraceptives and family planning. Abortions for all!

  5. Barry needs to make it so that the constituents of all the Republicans (& Dems) who voted against the package no getty stimulus check. That’ll be a great factoid to bring up around re-election time.

  6. Does this mean the post-partisan phase is over (thank God), and arrest warrants can now be issued for Yoo and Addington? They talk purty.

  7. Thank God the Republicans were there to vote against wasteful gubbermint spending as one robotic block. Cuz if there’s one thing they know about from Reagan to Bush it’s how to burn thru a lot of tax money. Maybe if Obama had wanted to stimulate the Iraq economy by dumping another trillion into one of its spidey-holes (with snaking clear to Zurich and a number linked to Halliburton) then these honest nonpartisan Republicans would have voted for it. To make us safe, you understand.

  8. I just read the fine print…. it’s 819 billion Zimbabwe dollars. Almost enough for a cup of coffee at Starbucks, if you can find one that that’s still open.

  9. “The vote was 244-188.” Call me crazy, call me wild, but, gosh gul-durnit, I sense that the era of partisanship is over. Break out the chilled Freixenet and the sippee cups.

  10. How ironic that I’m reading this as I’m listening to a Billy Bragg album and drinking a hot toddy. Because, you know, NO MORE NICE BOOZE after President Hussein reenacts Prohibition.

  11. [re=231285]S.Luggo[/re]: Maybe some of the stimulus package can be spent on airline tickets to The Hague for Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, Yoo, and Addington?

  12. I’m going use MY stimulus check to buy Iceland.

    And use the change to get wasted on aquavit (or whatever they call it in the North Atlantic) and three dollar Ikea rent-a-companions.

  13. We will see what happens in the Senate. The House is a frothing cesspool of screaming partisan hacks. You jam everything you can in the House version.

  14. My dear Mr. Preznit, please hurry my check along. If you do that, then I have a nice crisp bill with Abraham Lincoln on it that I will give to the DNC. The rest, of course, will go to my student loan overlords who are after me like hellhounds.

    kthxbai

  15. [re=231200]Texan Bulldoggette[/re]:
    Cool your fork before you nibble that organic endive salad, hippie.
    Once the bill is sent to the House/Senate reconciliation committee, Repugs will insert tax rebates for Georgia peanut processors, US importers of Chinese powdered milk, and Wyoming manufacturers of water boards and Vice-Presidential pace makers. America’s business is business. Therefore, you and the rest of the proletariat, socialist trash will just have to control your quivering lips and wait for your turn, beatnik. John Boehner told Jonah Goldberg so.

  16. Watching Brian Jennings on HD (he’s life size — I could kiss him), it just occurred to me that Chuck Todd looks just like Murray on Flight of the Conchords.

    “Prisint.”

  17. [re=231297]undermedicated[/re]: Good point. Since the secret prisons in Poland were closed, AIR CIA has beem short of revenue. Plus undr the Obama administration, AIR CIA’s flight stewards will now ask passengers, “ball-gag or no ball-gag.” Bush will probably answer, “Yes.”

  18. Obama is very sincere, articulate and intelligent, hes a winner. The republicans think its pay back for all the Bush hating. This doesn’t end well for the Rush Republicans. Bush fucked things up real good.

  19. I’m a little disappointed that there’s not more (any) moneyz for SUPERTRAINS, but I think the main points right now is to spend the money, irresponsibly if necessary, as soon as possible

  20. so so fucking hates these Repluglicans now, yes I hates them – what, 2 million lost jobs last year and they’re willing to sell us out for some little puke demonstration of their own futility – swear to God I’m fucking going to send the whole check right back to Barry’s re-election campaign (no snark here). I can still afford my own beer –

  21. [re=231350]snideinplainsight[/re]: YES BECAUSE BARRY WILL SAVE YOU FROM EVERYTHING ON THE PLANET. HE IS ALL POWERFUL AND SHOULD BE ABLE TO RUN IT FROM THE OVAL OFFICE, like Bush.

  22. [re=231350]snideinplainsight[/re]: Better to send your money to SarahPAC. At this point I don’t think there’s money to be better spent than to support the snowbilly’s 2012 bid.

  23. If we are back at war with the Republicans, does this mean we are on the same team as the PUMAs? Naah, I’m going with enemy of my enemy is also my enemy.

  24. [re=231356]snideinplainsight[/re]: You made a libtarded statement. There are no liberals allowed on Wonkette. KEEP DAT EIN MIND. Everyone here is a god-fearing, patriotic American. Unlike yourself.

  25. [re=231350]snideinplainsight[/re]: Rethink the dictionary definition of snide. Rethink current blog. Rethink user name. Rethink comment. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

    [re=231345]jagorev[/re]: You’d think with Biden in a position of (relative) power, it would be all TRAINS ALL THE TIME.

  26. [re=231350]snideinplainsight[/re]: Obviously you have never heard of Larry Sinclair. You should probably Google that name, because some SHIT HAS GONE DOWN with this “NOOBAMA” of yours.

  27. [re=231350]snideinplainsight[/re]: I’m gonna donate mine to the Conservopedia bored of directors. It’s my moneys, my choice (I choose life, y’all).

  28. Every President must spend a Trillion. If not on killing people, then on something else, like building infrastructure or bying Truck Nutz. The fucking awful part of the joke is if GWB had bought a Trillion Dollar set of Truck Nutz the World would be in a lot better shape than it is now.

    Yes, you can see I’ve been drinkin’ a bottle of Madeira and some glasses of Pastis thru the night here in Ye Olde Continent. But as you Wonketteers say: because why not?

  29. [re=231350]snideinplainsight[/re]: No hard feelings, just want to thin the herds in case we run out of hobo beans.

    @Jean Hotman: Truck Nutz and death squads made baby jesus why.

    [re=231373]sanantonerose[/re]: Librarian? *fapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfap* and all that. No secksism, also.

  30. [re=231332]wickedlittledoll[/re]: “No it doesn’t end well for the Republicans.”

    How did this not end well for Republicans? Barry bent over for them, chucked out all the favorite libtard parts of the bill, put in lots of pointless tax cuts, pissed off his own party (Rep. Lazio just on Rachel complaining that Obamabots spent more time cuddling with Republicans over this bill than with the FUCKERS WHO WON THE FUCKING ELECTIONZ) and still every goddamn Republican voted against it.

    Go Barry. Next I expect the Bush tax cuts to be made permanent, in the spirit of bi-partisanship, you know. Also.

  31. I hear today that I’m going to get $12 more in each paycheck with this bill. Hurry, please. That will cover a bag of cat litter and a bottle of cheap wine. Watch teh economy get stimulated!

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