Wonkette
TRUE RUMORS: Last week our Liz Glover was running from the demon clutches of Dick Cheney, and this week she’s … leaving us! For the Washington Times. For realz. All the more reason you should RSVP now to the Wonkette 2009 Inauguration Ball at Liz Glover’s Capitol Hill yoga circus. We will have much more about this Stunning Personnel Change, including a Farewell Video from Liz, but for now we post this because those slimeballs at Fishbowl DC somehow heard the secret news. [Fishbowl DC]
Well, somebody has to squeegee off Tony Blankley after the steam room.
Congrats, Liz! Healthcare awaits! Yoga, girl! Er ‘you go’. Whatevs.
Liz, I’m sure I’m not alone in thanking you for: 1) amusing & informative videos, and 2)being more adorable than we deserve. We will sorely miss you here!
I didn’t know Liz was a Moonie.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that. The Moonies have some kick-ass weddings.
Say “hi” to the Moonies for us, Liz! We’ll send flowers after your mass wedding day, after you are married off to a random Korean.
I will never understand these ambitious whippersnappers. Wonkette should have been plentyy enough FAIL to stake a future on…
FMA: total jinx.
The Washington Times? Is that a typo? Oh dear…
Sounds suspiciously like real work. Congratulations Liz. May your next paycheck be greater than the last and don’t drink the Kool-Aid.
The Times?! Are they even toilet trained over there? Be sure to ask them fun questions like “Who keeps this goddamn rag afloat?”
FMA: Atheist Nun: Healthcare is healthcare and not to be confused with poultices made of mashed hobobeans.
Liz Glover working for the cross-hating Rev. Moon? Say it ain’t so, Ken.
Ken, I thought “Truemor” was the accepted term for this type of thing. Plz confirm. Kthxbai!
Who is Liz Glover?
Hey, Liz, maybe you can help Tara Wall (a female version of Michael Steele/Ken Blackwell) see the light on Barry. She’s a bitch; hope you don’t accidentally key her car.
Well Liz, have fun at the Wash Times monthly demon-moran orgies. I hear many members of the ed page are hung . . . hung like republicans.
Monsieur Grumpe: After the Cheney thing, I thought we would have to send Liz someplace to be de-programmed, but to the Moonies…wtf?
I take this as a sign that the economy has recovered.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Our little Liz is growing up (sniff) and Mooning us.
Just remember dear, the Bird is not considered a proper greeting among Koreans.
Monsieur Grumpe: Or vice versa.
WT??? Wow, she’s got gutz.
WadISay: +1. And you thought Darth’s powers would fade after the Inauguration.
Once you are in his orbit, you are toast.
We are all Koreans now.
Does this mean I’m gonna have to start reading the Muniez paper or will our esteemed Wonkette editor’s just post it? Because I don’t need any(more) Taint on my computer.
Hey Liz, how about one more heavy-breathing dog-on-microphone tug before you go?
WadISay:
Re-de-programmed?
Liz’s next step up the ladder: quill sharpener at the National Review.
Tommy Says Ira G is a Tool:
Damn Jedi Mind tricks.
Monsieur Grumpe: Debugged :p
Monsieur Grumpe: I think this would be a great time to buy a house without a down payment or proof of income. Don’t you?
Oh, noes! Liz!
We’ll miss ya. I’ll especially miss *sniff* your beaming smile distracting us from anyone else in your photos.
(Um, it *is* a bit suspicious that the last we see of Liz is a photo with Dick Cheney. Anyone else smell a cover-up/conspiracy on the part of our ‘trusty’ editors? Hmmm??)
Texan Bulldoggette: She’s kinda hawt in a Smitty comes to the White House and sees Caribou Barbie in a towel and Tara in a maid’s outfit. Reverse oreo after the half-jay.
Wow! Liz, I googled your sis. You’re lucky she didn’t strangle you in your basinette.
*sheds tear for hot videographer who got a life*
Liz Glover’s a fucking valuable thing, you don’t just give her away for nothing.
i haz a sad. who’s gonna take pictures of drunk LNSers now?
Liquid: “(Um, it *is* a bit suspicious that the last we see of Liz is a photo with Dick Cheney. Anyone else smell a cover-up/conspiracy on the part of our ‘trusty’ editors? Hmmm??)”
That, and the fact that Cute Overload beat the Ken and Jim selection of F***YouPenguin makes me think that this departure may have not been so voluntary. Hmmm, indeed!
Aren’t they hiring at NewsMax.com? Or at Alex Jones’ show?
Anyang!
It’s a great time to join The Washington Times, too!
In the past year:
–The Times fired about 20 to 30 people, including a former Features Editor (who had a positive reputation in local arts circles), their longtime Society Reporter (who has a huge positive reputation in town), their longtime Society Photographer (a great photographer), a longtime reporter and editor on the Foreign Desk who worked at the paper for more than 25 years, a longtime National Editor who worked for the paper for at least 20 years or so, a longtime Photo Editor, with at least 10 years there, and a longtime, much-respected, revered journalist who worked in journalism on and off for 50 years–until he was fired by the Times;
–Stopped printing its own paper, shut down its state-of-the-art printing press, fired all the press production workers, and outsourced the printing of its paper to another newspaper;
–Pushed its two top editors out the door;
–Stopped publishing its Saturday edition;
–Saw several editors and reporters resign in disgust;
–Recently uprooted its entire editorial page department, with a top-ranking official saying he wants the paper to be a leading conservative voice.
But she’s so hawt!
thefrontpage: Sounds like you got the inside scoop on that rag.
thefrontpage: So they just offered Liz her own desk and a yoga mat and she took this gig? She should have held out for the free trip to Korea and an arranged marriage.
Washington D.C. has a social scene?
TGY: Truth. I’d work for the mummified Mongolian corpse of Genghis Khan if he was offering a decent health care plan.
I don’t visit the washingtontimes.com because it infects your computer with Moonie cookies that allow the Reverend to watch you while you masturbate to internet porns.
thefrontpage: Imagine the further downsizing when this crappy administration leaves(PLEASE BUSHIES, Hurry up and GO!)
The Bikram yoga should have been the first tip off she was a Moonie. Still, Moonies are really loose, right?
I am a latecomer to the scene (last summer) so I’ve only seen enough of Liz Glover to know she is hawt and too cute for words and frightened of nothing (Cheney photo.) Good luck to you, Liz.
Fuck the Washington Times, I gotta congratulate the woman for getting a Thelma and Louise shot with Magneto! Nice work, dude!
Bitch, are you fucking kidding me??
That is not snark. Oh my f’ing lord, fo real??
Well I am gonna trash that yoga joint tomorrow.
Now I hate Iiz Glover, so much more fun! Why so sad?
Liz at The Washington Times? Seems that Liz has discovered a lower common denominator to show her talents than at Wonkette. So much for her prep school education. Let’s hope that, at least, the school doesn’t try to claim money under TARP for a sudden despreciation in investment.
Washington Times? I told you, people: she got snatched by Dick Cheney’s spirit! She’s one of them now. Quick, someone get the silver bullets and the garlic. We need to exorcise the neocon out of her!
But seriously, Liz: congratulations and best of luck. We’ll miss you.
So, Liz did succumb to Cheney, and he got his fangs into her. But surely she does not deserve to have her lifeless corpse condemned to walk the halls of the Washington Times. I think if you stuff garlic in her mouth, you still might be able to save her soul.