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FORGETTABLE BUSH ADMINISTRATION FIGURES

BROWNIE EVACUATES DISASTER ZONE: Former FEMA head Michael Brown does one thing and does it well, and that’s getting himself as far as possible from natural disasters and straight to a safely distant Tex-Mex chain restaurant for appletinis and “bacon sliders.” Wildfires in Boulder? Michael Brown must be haulin’ ass. [Colorado Independent]


2:34 PM on Thu January 8 2009
By Jim Newell
630 Views

  1. They couldn’t have left him behind for being uppity? Told him to boil some water or something?

    AND HOW ON EARTH DID PEOPLE IN BOULDER LET HIM MOVE IN??? Isn’t that hippieland?

  2. Fivetree says at 2:40 pm, January 8th, 2009

    I think his official title forevermore should be “Vilified Ex-FEMA Director”. Let the vilification begin!

  3. bitchincamaro says at 2:41 pm, January 8th, 2009

    That’s funny. I evacuated a brown disaster zone this morning. Right after coffee.

  4. shanemacgowan says at 2:46 pm, January 8th, 2009

    Painful story. His epitath will read “He sucked like noone ever sucked before.”

  5. Tommy Says Soooo says at 2:46 pm, January 8th, 2009

    For the less insightful, “bacon sliders” are the result of fleeing from a natural disaster. A change of clothes is recommended.

  6. Madaloon says at 2:47 pm, January 8th, 2009

    I didn’t know that he lived so close to me. Now I want to go leave flaming brownies on his front porch.

  7. Obviously, he wasn’t evacuated far enough.

  8. Texan Bulldoggette says at 2:49 pm, January 8th, 2009

    Reminds me of the UPS slogan “What can Brown do for you?” Hmmm….how about hie his sorry good-for-nothing ass back to his Arabian horse farm in OKLA. What’s the matter, Brownie, OK not good enough for you anymore?

  9. actor212 says at 2:51 pm, January 8th, 2009

    bitchincamaro: Dammit! Get out of my head! At least wait until I’ve finished the renovations!

  10. freakishlystrong says at 2:56 pm, January 8th, 2009

    Shit, “Brownie” yet another unintentional Republican punchline…FAIL…

  11. shortsshortsshorts says at 2:58 pm, January 8th, 2009

    What can brown do for you?

  12. bitchincamaro says at 3:04 pm, January 8th, 2009

    actor212: In future, all blog snark involving FEMA shall refererence to FEcal MAtter.

  13. S.Luggo says at 3:05 pm, January 8th, 2009

    In lieu of further bombing, the Israeli government has hired Mikey to supervise relief efforts in Gaza.

  14. Just the frickin sight of that picture with those three fools makes me mad.

  15. V572625694 says at 3:06 pm, January 8th, 2009

    N8Ma: Oh, Boulder’s hippie-land, all right. But they still take any old kind of money — even Katrina-taint, horse-trading, lawyer money — in exchange for real estate.

  16. Lionel Hutz Esq. says at 3:06 pm, January 8th, 2009

    The scary thing is that, after eight years, Brownie is looking like the most competent member of the Bush Administration.

  17. Mista Eko says at 3:06 pm, January 8th, 2009

    Technically, “evacuate” means to empty. Ergo your headline is unintentionally stating that Brown singlehandedly and heroically emptied a disaster area of its inhabitants.

    It should read “In Disaster Zone, Brownie Evacuates Colon and Runs”

    /Above message brought to you by an otherwise useless The Wire Season 5

  18. Mr Blifil says at 3:10 pm, January 8th, 2009

    Heckuva job, wildfires.

  19. Cape Clod says at 3:18 pm, January 8th, 2009

    Hey, if he needs a place to stay, there are a bunch of mobile homes in Arkansas that no one is using.

  20. ManchuCandidate says at 3:19 pm, January 8th, 2009

    Lesson is all this? Don’t fuck with Mother Nature cause that bitch won’t quit.

    She took away his career and made him a laughing stock. Now she’s starting forest fires where he lives.

    What did you do, Brownie? What did you do?!?!????!?

    I certainly wouldn’t want to be his neighbor (I’m glad that I’m a non-white with no sense of entitlement.)

  21. Obamaton says at 3:24 pm, January 8th, 2009

    “and then…well…I was gonna put my finger in it and stop the flooding…but it got bigger…so then I ordered someone else in DC to do it for me…mainly ’cause I realized “Hey, I’m a white dude in the Ninth Ward”…know what I mean…”

  22. mylesfromnowhere says at 3:27 pm, January 8th, 2009

    Master of the Elements! He showed he could handle Air(Katrina) Water (New Orleans) and now Fire…If he moves to New Madrid and kickstarts the fault, he’ll USHER IN THE APOCOLYPSE!
    Good Job Brownie!

  23. Jukesgrrl says at 3:27 pm, January 8th, 2009

    Correction: The hanger reads, “Forgettable Bush Admistration Figures.” We wish.

  24. Time, time, time, see what’s become of him.
    While he looked around
    For his possibilities.
    We were too hard to please.
    Look around, there goes Brown.
    Man, that guy is a lazy, shady whiner.

    Thank you, thank you. I’ll be here all week.

  25. hobospacejungle says at 6:51 pm, January 8th, 2009

    Min: Is that the Simon & Garfunkel version or The Bangles version?

  26. gliberal says at 10:36 pm, January 8th, 2009

    Let’s see him handle that carnage on top of his head. If a little hurricane force wind kicks up, he’s going to look a lot like that Chertoff skull to his left.

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