Wonkette
Gawker commenter “likebitchisabadthing” sends us this alarming photo from one of them grabber-claw machines at a Friendly’s restaurant. See that weird cellophane-wrapped mummy in the middle, the one that says “John Kerry for President”? What is up with that, man? Is Kerry already planning a coup? See the close-up after the jump.
I’ve spent more than $1204.75 in quarters trying to get that piece of crap out so I could burn it since 2004. I’m beginning to think that the springs in the claw are not as strong as they could be.
Also in the machine: Teddy Ruxpin, Gem, and Talking Urkel.
jeebus, just shows you those machines are rigged and that nobody ever wins anything. bet if you dug down even more, you’d find a cellophane-wrapped Carter bear, wearing a peace necklace and john lennon glasses.
Kerry is trying to muscle in on Ron Paul’s base of Furries, sorry, CosPlay and Beanie Baby Collectors.
I see Larry Craig in the upper right hand corner.
This is depressing.
Looks like ‘Chemical Ali’ left his teddy bear in there too. Hmm….
Monsieur Grumpe: because the foot
Once I get out of Army practice - it’s mine!
Well at least the toys available in the game are fresher than the food served at Friendly’s.
The real issue is not the thing in the claw vending machine, but the dude’s name who sent the “information.”
An American in Toronto:
I thought they were honors from “Hero” Squad.
Didn’t you know Kerry is our shadow Prez; he hand picked Obama as keynote speaker in 2004. Hmm….
Do mine eyes decieve me, or is there a red bear in there with a Harley for genetalia? Is that like TruckNutz v.0.12?
NoWireHangers: And a cabbage patch senior citizen.
A John Kerry for President beanie baby placed in a claw game. It’s hard to see how this man lost. Perhaps enough people did play the Kerry 2004 video game they released for the Atari. The Kerry campaign was so cutting edge.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
I always thought Kerry was a fucking sadist. It’s hard enough grabbing the plush toys in the pincers, but he has to wrap his shit in shiny plastic wrapping? Thank god we got Bush instead. He’d have filled that bitch with crisp twenties, magnetized for easy removal, to provide a stimulus to the local small businesses, like liquor stores.
Do they give free sundaes to losers?
There’s a message here somewhere about not smoking crack.
I think that headline should read “John Kerry Running for President OF Local Friendly’s.”
All the other toys are hiding their identities and mooning the John Kerry toy. Swiftboating claw-machine style.
NoWireHangers: Do I see ALF in there too?
Oh, and the other machine has a Harrison stuffed squirrel emblazoned with “Tippecanoe and Tyler Too,” two James Blaine “Ma, Ma, Where’s My Pa, Gone to the White House, Ha Ha Ha” dolls, and a Goldwater plush mushroom that says, “In Your Heart, You Know He’s Right.”
I saw Hillary and Obama dolls in one of them grabber-claw machines a few days before the election. I assume there was no McCain doll because it would have frightened small children.
There is actually one of these machines in the Albertson’s by me that has a Dwight D. “I Like Ike” Eisenhower doll in it, for real.
I thought that was a loaf of Wonder Bread.
Min: I thought John Kerry was made out of Wonder Bread and slathered in ketchup.
All hail the forever-lasting John Kerry twinkie! You know he actually started out in life as banana-flavored.
Friendlies is now the most boring fun-place in the world. The taint of Kerry has scorned.
This is not a furry, if you lived in a blue state, you should recognize what’s done with abortions.
This Friendly’s restaurant is popular with furries looking to acquire sex partners, I’ll bet.
Underneath the wrapper, you’ll find one of his Purple Hearts.
toastandlove: Picture please!
Funniest plush toy I ever saw in one of those was a General Halftrack (of Beetle Bailey fame) in the piss-smelling lobby of a Sunshine (grocery store) in Sioux Falls, So Dak.
My brother could uneath this behemoth with no more than $2.00. He is a veritable claw game Rain Man.
John who? And what’s a “Friendly’s”? Are they hiring?
Why is he the only one wrapped in Anthrax protective plastic? This is far less mundane than it looks, people.
NoWireHangers: Ah! My favorite hobo sammich. I guess from now on we’ll just have to call that sammich “the john kerry” when we are all dining down by the railroad tracks.
SwiftClaws for Truth