Wonkette
Remember last week, when we posted some cartoonist’s Twitter about how the august Capitol Hill publication Roll Call was doomed? Well that was all a bunch of bunkum, and that’s the last time we’ll rely on some artist’s 160-character “blurps” or whatever they’re called for all our insidery publishing news. After the jump: Roll Call publisher Peter Cherukuri puts the rumors to rest.
Contrary to rumors posted on Wonkette and on Twitter, Roll Call is thriving and not at all at risk of shutting down. It’s unfortunate what is happening to consumer newspapers and other media outlets around the country but fortunately for our amazing employees, readers and advertisers, the state of Roll Call’s condition is healthier than ever.
With our singular focus on Congress since 1955, our revenues and business opportunities continue to grow. In August, we completed a $43 million acquisition of the highly respected grassroots technology company, Capitol Advantage, on the heels of a previous acquisition of the legislative tracking company, Gallery Watch. We are hiring across the board in editorial and business positions. Advertising and subscription revenues are strong. Our parent company, The Economist Group, is in full support of our business strategy and looks to us for significant expansion. Suffice to say, our prospects for 2009 and beyond are extremely positive.
Thank you for the opportunity to put to rest this rumor.
Sincerely,
Peter Cherukuri
Publisher
Roll Call Newspaper
Now everybody put down your riot gear and get back to work.
But rumor has it that Peter Cherukuri is a chronic liar (and a tranny, which is neither here nor there, but I think Wonkette readers should know this). So take all this with a grain of salt.
Aren’t things on Twitter called “Twits”.
I don’t mean the messages, I mean the user base.
That’s his story and he’s sticking to it.
I’ll share my hobobeans with them in the unemployment line.
So a rumor on Wonkette is important enough for Roll Call to notice and refute. I think that is clearly a sign Roll Call is in trouble.
So Hopey and family are here now. I am getting ready to go and kneel in front of the Hay Adams(sorry, I misled people here by saying they would stay at the 4 Seasons instead of the Hay Adams) and wait for the Presidential blessing.
This, of course, does not change the fact that the only people who read “Roll Call” are the people who work there. Well, some of them. In the bathroom.
…but fortunately for our amazing employees, readers and advertisers, the state of Roll Call’s condition is healthier than ever.
The Soviet Union said the same thing just before it folded, too.
Hmmm… this kinda reminds me of something …
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CXl1GkWWGmA&feature=related
WadISay: Are you suggesting Roll Call will soon be publishing articles about the record tractor production in DC?
We are hiring across the board in editorial and business positions.
This translates to: our employees are jumping ship faster than Kate Winslet’s socialite fiance did in Titanic.
Teh Wonkette should send Roll Call some Truck Nutz as a peace offering.
Failure is much more interesting than success. I demand to be made interested!
When a publication sets about to quash rumors that first appeared on Wonkette and Twitter, that organization is clearly reeling in death pangs.
“Cherukuri Girls” was a kick-ass Gwen Stefani song.
facehead: I think that guy works for Norm Coleman now.
allainjules: Nicolas read your article and is offended by what you said. He wants his fur handcuffs and ball-gag returned. And no more Twitter messages from Carla for you.
They’ll be dead in a week.
Roll who?
There was a letter from the CEO in our company’s most recent newsletter which bore a striking resemblance to this one, about how our company was built for times like this. Of course, I’m laid off as of January 1. Good luck fuckers! I wouldn’t put that riot gear all the way away just yet!
Everything on Twitter is true.
So now I’m finding out that all of the information I read on Wonkette is less than true? Does this mean there isn’t really any sale on Truck Nutz?
When Roll Call does fail, at least we’ll get to blame Wonkette for posting scurrilous rumors that thus caused a crisis of confidence in Roll Call and then it’s destruction. This is the exact same thing that happened to the stock market, Wonkette posts about someone’s Flickr page that might suggest the housing market is unstable and then our whole economy collapses.
http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/
allainjules: Mais nous ne faisons pas ne parlons pas français.
(obviously)
Special Agent Jack Mehoff: Not to be such a Gloomy Gus. As you join us at the smoky camp fire in New Hooverville, know that Mitch McConnell has our back:
http://www.cqpolitics.com/wmspage.cfm?docID=news-000003002729&parm1=5&cpage=2
“McConnell, appearing Sunday on ABC’s ‘This Week With George Stephanopoulos,’ voiced concern about reports that Democrats might extend unemployment benefits again and offer health care benefits for the unemployed.”
Fucking bastard socialists demrats. Next thing you know, they’ll be proposing something called “Food Stamps” and then where will we be?
Lascauxcaveman: Excusez moi. Non speak pas la langue de Quebec.
Boy, if I was an investor, that statement would reassure me.
Kev-O-Tron: Stop talking like that. Next you will be claiming that Dick Cheney doesn’t feast on the blood of the innocent.
S.Luggo: If you can trust the translation widget on my iMac; yeah, that’s pretty much what I said.
Lionel Hutz Esq.: I’m concerned that Obama might not actually be a half-breed muslin as well. This is scary.
But the rumors about Peter’s first marriage, as reported in the NYT are still swirling. This whole Role Call rumor is all just a Rove-style plot to distract us from the real question about the divorce.
http://www.nytimes.com/2007/09/30/fashion/weddings/30LENZNER.html?_r=1
The rather NSFW link to Daryl Cagle exactly expresses my idea of Daryl Cagle. Whatever differs from it, to the extent of the difference, is no Daryl Cagle.
You can’t even view the cartoons on Roll Call without being a subscriber. Maybe there isn’t any content, it’s just a shill for the Aerospace Industries Association. The Washington Times, at least, is bankrolled by Rev. Keith Moon or whoever and will outlast the Republic.
Kev-O-Tron: Well, clearly he is not a half-breed muslin. After all, we know that his supposed mother was in Honolulu faking his birth paperwork so he could be president while he was being born in a mosque in Mecca. That means he is a full-breed muslin.