Wonkette
A SENATE SEAT FOR CHRISTMAS: “There’s one kind of gift America can give no matter how poor we are, and no matter how many families live in boxcars and eat rats for dinner. It’s the greatest gift the Founding Fathers made available to certain Americans: a seat in the U.S. Senate!” [AOL Political Machine]
My dad was a janitor, so does that mean I get to be Senator of Larry Craig’s bathroom stall? (I hear it’s open)
I see 7 views and no comments, at least from some machine that dictates what I can see. My first opinion? WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN, KEN? YOU MAY be just like, ya know, enjoying some Hawiian thing or you might be driving a force in the Hawaiin desert sunset or drown in desert infhamy? Either way, you fiend, where have you been? And for that matter, why are you using ideas that have trickled down from generation to generation to create a Web Blog Award thing? Be careful. The dirty pigs will eat you alive. They are unforgiving cretins. It is your job to kill them all.
Mommy, why didn’t Santa give me one for Christmas?
And as this shorts shuts his mouth, the fucking gold standard that lasted until our best friend FDR can be blamed for the fucking fact that our money is worth as much as our relatives and we are all currently plotting against them all.
If you aren’t, you don’t understand the severaty of the crisis.
Happy Holidays!
Gift, hell. Blago knows he’s gonna go before an all black Detroit jury. So how can he endear himself to them? By appointing a much beloved black politician to the vacant Senate seat. Of course, Blago may be blocked by that nasty white Senator Reid and his nasty white Senator pals, but AT LEAST BLAGO TRIED, which shows that his big loving non-discriminatory heart is in the right place, not the white place, the end.
Ooops! “Detroit” should have been “Chicago.” But what’s the difference?
This is almost as scary as when Bush was appointed in 2000.
Aurelio: Sheeeeiiiiit, it worked for Clay Davis.
People have been selling their seats since the beginning of time; isn’t it called the world’s oldest profession?
Ah, Boleskine House — that hotbed of historical revisionism. And Nessie sightings.
By the way, didn’t most senators gain their seats by vote of the state legislature or appointment by the governor back in the day? That was the sort of decisive commitment to overt favoritism that brought us the real benefits of democracy — like the Civil War and the many benefits that accrued therefrom. It’s like we’ve forgotten who we are as a people. Sigh.
I heard Ken was out looking for about $3.50.
Economics journal my rear end. Wonkette is into comparative lit, as those recent Dylan and Bellow references clearly indicate.
I knew it was a typo yesterday when that award said you are a liberal blog. Thanks for clarifying this is an Oxford-based economics think tank.
Aurelio: Jury? I thought the Blagger would get put to pasture by a distinguished panel of his peers. Or the mob. Same thing really.
And Burris’ first move as Senator will be legislation for free flea collars and tick baths for the burgeoning population of boxcar dwellers.
The New American Perfect Storm of Collapse and Calamity doesn’t include rat-borne epidemic.
That’ll come in 2012.
Could be Wurris.
Aurelio: Except that it is not Detroit- the news just said the same thing.
Does your seat come with taint?
cal: Apparently, this joke has already been made. Repeatedly. My apologies to all.
MoodProcessor: Don’t forget the recent swarm of earthquakes at Yellowstone, leading one to believe the Great Yellowstone Supervolcano may be getting ready to blow us all into eternal boxcar habitation. Armageddon, ftw!
Hey Ried, I say seat him. He ain’t Plexico fer chrissake.
ALL I Want for New Years (originally Two Front Teeth)
Everybody Pauses and stares at me
These corruption charges, you see
I don’t know just who to blame for this catastrophe!
But my one wish on New Years Eve is as plain as it can be!
All I want to give away
is a Senate Seat,
is a Senate Seat,
Barry’s Senate Seat!
Gee, if I could only
appoint that Senate Seat,
then I could shout out
“Go fuck yourselves.”
Given the hardy circumstances we can all soon expect to live in, I think it will be fitting if in the future all senators are chosen in a trial by combat. This is why I’m planning to move to Connecticut and issuing a challenge for Lieberman’s seat. I can’t wait to stick that cocksucker with a trident.
Somewhat OT FYI on Roland, Roland II, Rolanda (and economics!):
Paul Krugman’s middle name is Robin. His wife’s name is Robin. His first wife’s name is
Robin.
I’m waiting for the 2009 release of Rush’s new CD. the campaign for RNC is still in the air and with the new Saltsman effect, who will get the bump?
a seat in the U.S. Senate
I’m sorry, sir, but your seat is in the upper deck…
Uncle Glenny: The conclusion being that great economists are the product of inbreeding?
Cape Clod: fight to the finish with Throwing Stars of David
Oh Ken, you wacky postmodern relativist, you!
shortsshortsshorts: win to you for your AOL comment. I laughed out loud.
The Obamas move here this weekend. I expect to see all Wonketteers on their knees, heads bowed during this holy event. Because Dumya wouldn’t let them move into Blair House- they are staying at a hotel. The details have not been released but I am pretty sure you can count out the Courtyard Marriott in Burtonsville and the drug and hooker Days Inn in Silver Spring.
finallyhappy: Errrr, could we pass on the kneeling bit? I haven’t quite recovered from my ACL surgery and besides, it looks Muslin.
finallyhappy: I was thinking the drug and hooker all-suites hotel at the intersection of 395 and Duke Street and near the Total Beverage just outside Alexandria. It has the triple benefit of: 1) incredible road noise; 2) drugs and hookers, and 3) construction workers stay there, so you are woken up at 4 a.m. when they all leave for their job sites. The Obamas would be experiencing “real America”!
kapish: It’s Plaxico, I believe, and he’s holding out to be appointed to fill Hillary’s seat. It wouldn’t be the first time Plaxico’s attempted to “fill Hillary’s seat” as it were, if you capiche what I mean, knowwaddimeen? Only problem is his “gun” keeps shooting off down his thigh before he means for it to “go off.” Catchmydriftknowwaddimeen?
queeraselvis v 2.0:
I enjoyed that comment, too… assuming that it was sincere(ly ridiculous) rather than sarcastic. I really couldn’t tell, but I’m going with sincere, because that’s the more amusing option.
Bruno: !!! THINK TANK !!! That’s Us! (I think.)
I’m thinking.
I’m thinking…
I’m thinking there’s a pretty good chance I’m going to get drunk tonight.
Can I just have a stocking full of coal, instead?
Pretty sure all the comments on there so far are from Wonkette readers. They are just too blantantly batshit crazy to actually be batshit crazy.
Mr Blifil:
Senatore Plaxico don’t like you talking about his personal problems.
Be careful.
One phone call from Plax and you swim with the fishes.
To Ken Layne,@ Boleskin House: I’ve dug many of your guitar solos over the years, and those dragon embroidered threads from ‘76 were fuckin’ cosmic.”Diary of a Drug Fiend” still resonates.