PERFUNCTORIES  9:56 am December 23, 2008

by Jim Newell

Inappropriate!POLITICO MUST BE BOMBED TO HELL, RIGHT NOW: “Obama has been photographed several times without his shirt as a presidential candidate but he’s about to step into the White House — so how much skin is too much? There is a fine line, experts said, and this time at least, Obama was on the right side of it.” And in the next paragraph, there’s a quote from an expert! He says it’s normal for the humans to take their shirts off at the beach! And the expert’s name is “Howard Bragman,” which is clearly made up. Ugh. We’re not even going to link to this article. [Mystery Link]

 

Hola wonkerados.

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{ 67 comments }

finallyhappy December 23, 2008 at 10:00 am

What is the mystery link? I am on cold meds so I don’t get it(does anyone?)

Darehead December 23, 2008 at 10:00 am

“It’s normal for the humans to take their shirts off at the beach!”
Not. Good Muslim men do not take their shirts off!

ManchuCandidate December 23, 2008 at 10:00 am

Topless Obama makes the Wingnuts uncomfortable and feeling all throbby.

CorkPopper December 23, 2008 at 10:01 am

The stupid, it burns!

Darehead December 23, 2008 at 10:04 am

And Bitterz are bummed cuz it coulda been a topless Hillary.

BillyClubb December 23, 2008 at 10:07 am

Yeah, I think Bill Clinton showed a little too much skin at the white House, in the Oval Office, with Monica Lewinski. As long as Barry doesn’t cross that “fine line” he can walk around the White House shirtless for all I care.

freakishlystrong December 23, 2008 at 10:08 am

It it was on on Politico then expect the comment:
“NOBAMA IS A MUSLIN, THEY DON’T REMOVE THEIR SHIRTS, ONLY SHOES11!!!1″

WadISay December 23, 2008 at 10:08 am

Topless bathing: is it Lincolnesque? Politico reports, you decide.

Bruno December 23, 2008 at 10:10 am

This is such a double standard. When SnowBilly was basking by the pool at the GOP Guvs convention in Florida, everyone paid attention and we couldn’t see any of her girly bits.

Its time to step up to the plate Snowbilly – if you want to be presidential, start acting that way.

Taonut December 23, 2008 at 10:12 am

If you stare at the mystery link picture long enough you can see the word “Hopey”

nmmagayar December 23, 2008 at 10:13 am

[re=204520]Bruno[/re]: ugghhh! Must use teh brain bleach. Thank g-d i’m teh gay

BarthexDeRosa December 23, 2008 at 10:13 am

There’s lots of pix of Kennedy with his shirt off, poolside. Point is, no matter what their politics, most presidents know when the world doesn’t want to see them with their shirt off. Nixon? Reagan? Either Bush? No, and no thank you.

Bruno December 23, 2008 at 10:14 am

[re=204520]Bruno[/re]: By these standards, Paris Hilton is more presidential than SnowBilly

V572625694 December 23, 2008 at 10:14 am

How does Politico manage to be so boring? It’s boring to look at, boring to read, boring to think about. Do you suppose they have an in-house Director of Boringness who exterminates all interesting information or graphics?

As a regular reader of Talking Points Memo, I know boring when I see it.

PoliticalGraffiti December 23, 2008 at 10:16 am

[re=204509]finallyhappy[/re]: well, im pretty high, and i think it’s moving…or is it?

PoliticalGraffiti December 23, 2008 at 10:19 am
Perot le fou December 23, 2008 at 10:20 am

The mystery link…that’s a penis for sure.

Darehead December 23, 2008 at 10:20 am

We can be grateful that we never saw W with his shirt off. However, one of his loyal retainers guarding our Homeland is named Shirtoff. A befitting name for the team of Bush, Dick and Cuntileeza.

Mild Midwesterner December 23, 2008 at 10:20 am

Muslim men can go around shirtless all they want. Aladdin only wore only a vest and MC Hammer pants.

Miller December 23, 2008 at 10:23 am

Finally a President I can wank to for his policies, power, and looks. This is why McCain/Palin lost, Sarah never walked around showing off the sweater meat.

http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/

shanemcgowan December 23, 2008 at 10:24 am

[re=204511]ManchuCandidate[/re]: Shirtless Obama means nothing to the wingnuts. He’s above age 12.

Chad San Marino December 23, 2008 at 10:24 am

Shit, Obama is 15 years older than me and if I had his body, I’d only wear a shirt of you staple-gunned it to my chest. I wouldn’t even own any shirts unless they were skintight. I’d go to work shirtless with a jacket and tie, and my only concession to the cold would be band-aids on my nipples. You do you, Hopey.

actor212 December 23, 2008 at 10:26 am

Wait…it’s NORMAL to strip down to your civvies on a tropical island in the sun?

Exposing your breasteses for all the world to see?

Why can’t women, then?

pourmecoffee December 23, 2008 at 10:26 am

You know Rick Warren would hit that. C’mon.

hockeymom December 23, 2008 at 10:26 am

He’s not naked enough.

shanemcgowan December 23, 2008 at 10:27 am

[re=204528]Perot le fou[/re]: I feel the same way looking at the Mystery Link as I do when I read Michele Malikin.

That Politico column seems to be full of both Bias and Bull.

SayItWithWookies December 23, 2008 at 10:27 am

“Eat your heart out, Sarkozy,” wrote one commenter on The Huffington Post, one of a select few outlets to receive the images Monday.
Heh, heh — Politico won’t grab the pix from TMZ. Babies.

Monsieur Grumpe December 23, 2008 at 10:28 am
ManchuCandidate December 23, 2008 at 10:29 am
Advocatus_Diaboli December 23, 2008 at 10:31 am

God I hate slow news weeks. And I don’t mean that as a shot at Wonkette; just in general, slow news weeks make for little snark. I can barely get excited about the vapidity of Politico.

Waldo Geraldo Faldo December 23, 2008 at 10:31 am

Animal Collective, the Wonkettes? You too?

AngryBlakGuy December 23, 2008 at 10:33 am

…well he certainly looks more comfortable than Michelle!

Madeline December 23, 2008 at 10:34 am

Thanks a lot Wonkette. Between the mystery link and the strobe-esque LED lights that I bought for their energy-saving goodness, I will be queasy and/or having an acid flashback all morning.

Darehead December 23, 2008 at 10:35 am

Monsieur — so that’s Trig’s real mother! It all makes sense now.

Darehead December 23, 2008 at 10:36 am

[re=204549]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: Hey, Burkinis are all the rage now.

P Drizzle December 23, 2008 at 10:36 am

[re=204547]Waldo Geraldo Faldo[/re]: The Jim only talks so much trash about dope-smoking Second Life hippies cause HE IS ONE.

4tehlulz December 23, 2008 at 10:37 am

The fact that Barry won’t allow Michelle to be topless too proves that he is a Muslim.

/No Quarter

freakishlystrong December 23, 2008 at 10:37 am

[re=204544]Monsieur Grumpe[/re]: fjdslf;j fdosidfopa!!@ jfsadkfl;sa

Did that come out ok? I scratched my eyes out….

Delicious December 23, 2008 at 10:38 am

Drudge has a poll asking his Drudgetards who looks better shirtless?

Obama or Putin?

Putin is winning.

Not_So_Much December 23, 2008 at 10:39 am

I like the mystery link more than anything I see on Politico.

Inna-gada-da-vida baby!

AngryBlakGuy December 23, 2008 at 10:41 am

[re=204553]Darehead[/re]: …you should should see the tan lines!

shortsshortsshorts December 23, 2008 at 10:41 am

These are the important issues in this country, which is why we must all be firebombed immediately.

MarieDeGournay December 23, 2008 at 10:42 am

Ugh, that’s so dumb.

m_supercomputer December 23, 2008 at 10:46 am

[re=204557]Delicious[/re]: …oh my god, I thought you were joking, and no. No you are not. Isn’t asking his target audience of self-loathing gay men who think they can pray their orientation away which guy looks hotter shirtless going to cause their brains to implode?

SayItWithWookies December 23, 2008 at 10:46 am

[re=204557]Delicious[/re]: That’s just ’cause the Drudgetards look into Putin’s soul — his shirtless, man-titted, autocratic, baby-eating soul — and get hot. It takes all kinds.

coolcatdaddy December 23, 2008 at 10:47 am

People take their shirts off at the beach?

What about the obscene bare skin offending the sensibilities of the young ladies?

Next thing you know, women will be wearing short dresses showing off bare ankles or something. Hmph.

thefrontpage December 23, 2008 at 10:48 am

Can you stop with these stupid pictures? It’s like the Peggy Noonan thing–why, and who the hell cares? It’s a guy on the beach on vacation–like tens of millions of other people every week. Do you guys not ever go to the beach? We all love Wonkette–but, really, no one cares if someone goes to the beach. No one cares. Move on! Next news story, please! There’s a lot going on the world.

tribalpottery December 23, 2008 at 10:55 am

Howard Bragman is a famous flack.

finallyhappy December 23, 2008 at 11:01 am

[re=204567]thefrontpage[/re]: Really- something more important than the photo of our hot new president? Looking for News of the boring- ever hear of CNN or NYT?

Naked Bunny with a Whip December 23, 2008 at 11:09 am

I don’t understand this. Where is the spandex costume that Hopeyman wears beneath his secret-identity “Barack Obama” garb?

A Geek Tragedy December 23, 2008 at 11:15 am

Does this mean that Teh Gheys forgive him now?

Nigerian Business Executive December 23, 2008 at 11:17 am

[re=204567]thefrontpage[/re]: Here you go! You’re most welcome!

Nigerian Business Executive December 23, 2008 at 11:18 am

[re=204587]A Geek Tragedy[/re]: Nope

Serolf Divad December 23, 2008 at 11:25 am

Don’t most experts in how much skin you should show mostly work in porn?

norbizness December 23, 2008 at 11:28 am

Don’t forget the White House Christmas card of 1911, featuring naked gastropod William Howard Taft sprawled out on a bearskin rug in front of a fire.

Darehead December 23, 2008 at 11:32 am

[re=204598]Serolf Divad[/re]: Either that or religion.

Hooray For Anything December 23, 2008 at 12:06 pm

To: Politico
From: Hooray for Anything

Really?

sowbelly December 23, 2008 at 12:29 pm

The go to celebrity for shirtless, Matthew McConaughey, will do a spot on Today with body apologist Al Roker.

Mustang December 23, 2008 at 12:31 pm

[re=204567]thefrontpage[/re]: Here here! I care deeply if someone goes to the beach! Hopey in trunks = Ah OOO Gah! BTW Mystery Link = Nausea

AfghanVet December 23, 2008 at 12:36 pm

Putin is not going to allow this shirtless gap to continue. I suspect they are planning a shirtless counter-strike within the next week. If we are not careful we could have shirtless escalation that will bring in the French and then it will be totally out of control.

stopmebeforeitypeagain December 23, 2008 at 12:38 pm

Who or what is the so-called “”NIA-MALIKA HENDERSON”" who graces the pages of Politico, and what does she/he/it — pronounced “sheeeeeit” — want? Has ‘sheeeeeit’ got the hots for Hopey?

What’s the deal with this alleged “Paparazzo”? Is there some scheme afoot to inflame the loins of AMERICA, and weaken our Moral FiberTM?

C’mon, Wonkettes. We must get to the bottom of this.

Bruno December 23, 2008 at 2:11 pm

[re=204680]AfghanVet[/re]: I cannot accept any additional escalation in the shirtless cold war until Kim Jong Il bears all.

Atheist Nun December 23, 2008 at 2:20 pm

‘And in the next paragraph, there’s a quote from an expert!’

Now, this ‘Naked Obama Expert’ job you speak of, can I apply for this on Obama’s employment webpage, or is this more of a freelance position?

Purple Tide December 23, 2008 at 2:38 pm

Answer me this, Howard Brag Man: why does Mr. NOBama not wear an american flag bikini like my muse, the saucy snow-queen, America Lovin’ Sarah Palin. And where’s his gun? And don’t talk about that curly little prawn in his Speedo®. Real Americans don’t trust the sharks to behave themselves.

Min December 23, 2008 at 2:58 pm

That’s what this country needs, dammit! More fetching nudity in the White House!

Jollity December 23, 2008 at 4:38 pm

[re=204539]pourmecoffee[/re]: Everyone would hit that, to be fair.

People who say they wouldn’t are lying.

TGY December 24, 2008 at 12:09 am

According to our press, we are a nation of retards.

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