Wonkette
Barack Obama is so very fancy that he has three names instead of two or even just one, like Madonna, and like the socialist Muslin alien he is, he will insist on reciting all three of his names in a Klingon-Arabic patois when he is sworn in on Thomas Jefferson’s Koran. This is an extremely disturbing development, especially given that the last socialist sworn into office — Jimmy Carter — only used two names in accordance with his status as a common prole.
During the campaign, Obama’s detractors would often invoke his middle name, Hussein, in an attempt to falsely paint him as a Muslim. Obama, a Christian, doesn’t care.
“I think the tradition is that they use all three names, and I will follow the tradition,” he said. “I’m not trying to make a statement one way or another. I’ll do what everybody else does.”
Well, HUSSEIN BARACK OSAMA, the things that “everybody else does” when they run for president tend to include being white, which you have (half) failed at.
Obama will freak out millions of Americans at his swearing-in when they suddenly discover his middle name is the same that Iraqi dictator’s, and his last name rhymes with the name of the King of Terrorism. This has never, ever before occurred to many of the people who voted against him because he was “scary.”
Barack Obama plans to reach out to Muslim world [Chicago Tribune]
Milhous!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
EPIC HALF-FAIL.
Barack Hussain Osama sounds awfully British, doesn’t it? HMMMM??
Just wait til he rips off the mask and it turns out he’s really the Barber of Baghdad, or the shoe bomber, or Bill Clinton!
Up yours, wingnuts.
A friend painted a lovely narrative recently:
After B. HUSSEIN Obama is sworn in there could possibly be a beautiful camera shot of him and Michelle stepping into the WH as the door closes behind them. At that moment it will dawn on all the wingnuts that there is actually a black family in the White House.
Ears will bleed and temples will burst.
My father married a pure Cherokee
My mother’s people were ashamed of me
The indians said I was white by law
The White Man always called me “Indian Squaw”
CHORUS:
Half-breed, that’s all I ever heard
Half-breed, how I learned to hate the word
Half-breed, she’s no good they warned
Both sides were against me since the day I was born
We never settled, went from town to town
When you’re not welcome you don’t hang around
The other children always laughed at me
“Give her a feather, she’s a Cherokee”
Repeat Chorus
We weren’t accepted and I felt ashamed
Nineteen I left them, tell me who’s to blame
My life since then has been from man to man
But it can’t run away from what I am
Repeat chorus
WOOHOO!
Embrace that inner terrorist, Barry Soetero!
Kev-O-Tron:
And they’ll want to sell their houses but they don’t know where to move. Haha!
Oh, they’re gonna freak when he says “I, Barry Hussein al-Rashid Soetero….”
The Freeps were ALL over this. Basically crowing that it proved their point, and, in the next twisted sentance, that it wasn’t his real name!!!!1!
I, Barak Half-Breed Muslin Obama, do solemly swear . . .
You know, if pronounced and inflected upon incorrectly by the swearer-inner, it will sounds like Barack Hussei NObama. Which will be awesome.
Anyway, is Bill Ayers still scheduled to bomb Barry towards the dais from Chicago, with his ACORN?
actor212: Our tinfoil hats are getting some frequency bleed-through.
9:45 isn’t too early to start drinking, is it? Cause I could use one.
The wingnuts try to paint er-body as the boogeyman, don’t they? Funny wingnuts! Barack Hussein Obama sounds like a delicious flavor of mullato soup!
Today, we are all Muslins.
I was disappointed with the Clinton appointment and outraged at the appeasement of Joe Lieberman, but if he’s going to use the Hussein in his inauguration then, by god, that makes up for everything.
Eat shit, republican motherfuckers.
HNIC.
StephanieInCA: It’s never too early to start drinking. Just think about tomato juice while you slam the vodka: It’s a Bloody Mary, so you’re not an alcoholic, today!
OBAMA… OSAMA… HUM… ARE THEY BROTHERS?
Ah, but you missed the other signs of comparison with “the last socialist sworn into office — Jimmy Carter” (whose grandmother is also Hopey’s gramdmama):
“As the Blagojevich drama unfolded across Dearborn Street in the federal courthouse, Obama lounged in an armchair in his spare black-and-gray office, a scattering of peanut shells from his afternoon snack littering the floor.”
Yes, peanuts are back in the White House, littering the fancy Anglo-Saxon carpeting and staining the fine damask sofas of three hundred years of good Anglo-American presidencies! Except this time, the trailer trash comes from Chicago’s South Side and speaks in a weird Luo accent of ancient Muslin.
Speaking of grandmoms, they’re coming along, too, and one is even named Bubba:
http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2008/dec/10/back-in-the-same-nest/
Advocatus_Diaboli: From Simpson Tide…
Russian official: The Soviet Union will be pleased to offer amnesty to your wayward vessel.
American official: The Soviet Union? I thought you guys broke up.
Russian official: Yes, that’s what we wanted you to think! [laughs, communist factories start producing tanks again, the Berlin Wall re-erects itself out of the ground, and Lenin rises from the grave, saying "Must Crush Capitalism, Rrr!"]
But you see he has to say his full name, at precisely the right time when the sun will be reflecting off of Dick Cheney’s head so as to illuminate a never before noticed tiny window in the Washington monument. The light shinning through that window combined with the combined with the historic sonic dissonance of a black man named Hussein declaring himself president will cause the monument to topple over revealing a hidden stairway leading deep underground. Nicholas Cage will descend the stairway and retrieve an enormous treasure of walnuts stored there by our first chief executive as a kind of rainy-day fund. Cage will sell the walnuts on e-bay for 800 Billion dollars which should be just enough to bale us all out.
I would think Barack Obama would be more careful. I’m in the same boat as he is. My mother was white, and I’m smart enough to live in mortal terror of anyone finding out that my middle name is Albert.
V572625694: bloody marys are only good until 2:00pm…they are a brunch drink! (this was my mother’s law — never to be subverted or something)
nice to see my relatives in texas have learned to write! (or in their parlance: right)
SayItWithWookies: You may have posted 15 minutes ago but it’s 1 pm here in Ole Virginny.
You mean “on Thomas George Jefferson’s Koran”, honky.
freakishlystrong: Here is the freepers thread. This is fantastic
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2146115/posts Don’t know how to do fancy hyper linking
I don’t think it’ll be the mentioning of his middle name that will freak people out but more the fact he’s taking the oath surrounded by members of the Nation of Islam.
NotAnEvilLobbyist: thank you.
True fact about “Madonna”: her actual given christian name is “Madonna”. !!
Same thing with “Prince” - His real name is Madonna, too. Or Primadonna, I can’t remember which.
But not Bono, he was born a Chuck or Roger or something…
“As the Blagojevich drama unfolded across Dearborn Street in the federal courthouse, Obama lounged in an armchair in his spare black-and-gray office, a scattering of peanut shells from his afternoon snack littering the floor.”
It’s true: V572625694: bloody marys are only good until 2:00pm…they are a brunch drink!
Time to leave out the tomato juice and the foliage and switch to straight vodka.
I used to go by steven although my family calls me stevie and now i go by estevan. the freepers would assume i’m either:
a) a liar
b) a mexican terrorist or
c) just pretentious
After the oath, Obama’s terrorist friends will blow up DC and kill everyone there. The end.
from Freerepublic:
This story has the potential to make a large swath of the conservative base look like total lunatics. I hope World Net Daily is on the story.
the CHICAGO TRIBUNE is still publishing? I thought
that gov ROD (happy birthday, you nozzle)
bought them with all of his senate bribe $$$,
declared bankruptcy, and buried all of
yesterday’s editions in a GM SUV.
Lascauxcaveman: Actually, Bono’s middle name is Madonna too, which is gaelic for “He Who Will Not Shut the Fuck Up.”
the free republic posts are so sweet. are any
wonketeers commenters on their site?
or do freepers just write to Wonkette Ken
when he is on AOL?
or are the freep posts generated by
chimpanzees or sarah palin?
qwerty42:
oh my fucking god. I’ve never been to freeperland before. Shit, that stuff is scary.
“To: Bluegrass Conservative
” something that he didn’t even control.”
Before you make another uninformed comment like this again, you may want to read up and learn about Obama. Obama was not his birth name. “
I didn’t know this, but I’ll bite. Who can enlighten me with Barry’s birth name?
On that fateful day, at that fateful moment, there will be much hooting and hollering and clumsy high-fiving (we’re white, after all) at Min’s house, as she and her two or three liberal friends (and I am damned lucky to have that many in Tennesssee) watch the inauguration and celebrate.
Go Barry! Go Barry!
NotAnEvilLobbyist: President-elect Obama says he plans to use all three of his names when he takes the oath of office in January, giving voice to a name that was used heard during the campaign except by critics.
Please diagram that sentence.
Advocatus_Diaboli: That confused me, so I googled it and found this:
[i]I doubt his real name is Barack Hussain Obama.
It is a fact that his father’s name was : Barack Hussain Obama. For those who are not familiar with Muslim practices, there is no such thing as middle name . When a male is born, he will have a name given to him. If first born that will be the name of his grandfather, followed by ” son of_ (name of father)” then followed by a name that identifies the family. Over time the “son of ” was dropped and the standard for a first born would : (Name of grandfather) + (Name of father) + (Family name)
We know that the current presidential candidate’s father’s name was:
Barack Hussain Obama
Then his male first born’s name would be:
Hussain Barack Obama
It is very likely that the current presidential candidate’s birth name was Hussain Barack Obama and he most likely had it changed legally to Barack Hussain Obama perhaps to make it sound less offensive to “bigots”.
This whole speculation would be put to rest if the candidate would provide 2 things to the voters:
A copy of his birth certificate
and a copy of his transcripts from the school he attended in Indonesia.[/i]
http://www.danielpipes.org/comments/121036
Not sure if that’s the same insane theory the Freepers are going with…
Advocatus_Diaboli: The name on his real birth certificate, you know the one he won’t show us, is Benito Stalin Mao Darth Vader Dracula Hitler, Jr.
Blue Line:
mookworthjwilson:
yes, this is all very scary. I used teh googlez too and can’t believe how much bandwidth has been spent (wasted) on Barry Soetoro, Hussein Barack, etc.
I guess when you can’t make any useful arguments about policy, the next best thing is to create outlandish conspiracy theories, right?
Look, for the last time, his name is BARUCH(Blessed) HUCHEM(means wisdom- yiddishized) OBAMAWITZ. WE have the real birth certificate. He was born in Brooklyn and studied at a yeshiva. His father was from Africa but he was an Ethiopian Jew(he got the name Obamawitz when he came to the US) and his mother was the 4th daughter of the Bobbemeise Rebbe. No more questions- all will be revealed in time.
Obama’s father was non-practicing, so I doubt he much cared about doin’ it Muslim-style. Same way I’m technically Catholic yet don’t go to church unless I’m stealing boys from the priests.
Panderfinder: i signed up and posted on free republic once ala wonkette and they took away my posting privilege (so much for free speech!) and when i tried to post again received a message of “go post your liberal bile elsewhere!”
Seriously, it sounds like some of you chuckleheads just discovered Free Republic. For the uninitiated, just imagine the stupidest thing possible and multiply it by 1000. With comments.
Damnit! Why won’t Barry just release the birth certificate to prove once and for all that he’s Trig’s mother?!
Sarjo: *sigh* Humans should just stop reproducing. It’s gotten too complicated. I mean it. It’s like school: you take something fun, like talking (fucking), and make it into something horrible, like diagramming sentences (children).
NotAnEvilLobbyist: I was reading it but did not want to cause undue Freeperism on my fellow Wonketeers, so I decided not to link, scary shit, no?
norbizness: Sigh..sadly my sister has been one since 2001-I haz a sad…
Advocatus_Diaboli: John Beresford-Tipton
This is just what Revelation fortold! Rainbow Man was right. We must repent!
Advocatus_Diaboli: Harold Washington
american mutt: Or gay.
ZOMG! That photo of Barry being dressed in traditional costume… Tainted Muslin!
Wait wait wait. What the fuck is up with this “Soetero” shit? From where did these crazies get this conspiracy theory?
Servo: Damn fuckin’ right he is.
BarthexDeRosa: bwahahaha
The Station Manager: It’s his step-father’s name. The wingnuts insist that he adopted Barry and raised him as Muslim or some other crazy shit.
Also, perhaps the wingnuts would be happier with an English translation of his name? I believe that would be Blessed, Handsome/Beautiful Burning Spear. How you think they’d like that?
HENNGH!
TexasCowGirl: Well, now I’ve got a title for that Obama themed porno I’m producing.
Servo: Whoa, are you the urban affairs correspondent for msnbc.com or something?
no, this is not the first day I have “read”
twee-republic-dot-com, but one of the
wurzelburgerest days of posting.
a former friend (thrown under the bus
of x-friendship as a result of her
racist conduct during the campaign will
be subcribed to freep as an Xmas gift.
Before he converted, they say he was known as Cassius Clay
Advocatus_Diaboli: you need to check out Joe Plumber’s blog if you want scary
TexasCowGirl:
…and I’m damn fuckin’ proud that I help put him there!