Wonkette
POWER LINE THINKS IT CAN MESS WITH US: The loser mcloseralots at Power Line have urged their readers to play the car game constantly: “Here’s the thing: so far, Power Line readers are doing very poorly compared to some other sites. Wonkette, actually, is in the lead, and they’re crowing about it, although they also acknowledge that it may reflect poorly on the employment status of their readers.” Oooh, burn! Power Line is now in second place, with approximately one-seventh as many points as us. Keep an eye out. Nate Silver’s Eco Drivers still fucking suck. [Power Line]
Kos readers are currently 57th, but they have written 212 well researched diaries about it.
I might have found a car I can drive while I smoke muh rocks.
Suck it, Nate.
You know, we score another 38,000,000 points and EcoDrive USA sends a pair of green TrukNutz.
Drive on!
lulz….from the link: UPDATE: In the brief time since I did this post, PL readers have surged into third place in the “Ecodriving” standings.
Powerline readers’ll never catch us — they’re all too busy fighting in Iraq. Christ, I can’t even type that without laughing.
Less commenting. More driving muthafuckers! This is all some of us have goddamit.
Here’s the thing: so far, Power Line readers are doing very poorly compared to some other sites. Wonkette, actually, is in the lead, and they’re crowing about it, although they also acknowledge that it may reflect poorly on the employment status of their readers.
What is that, PROPER GRAMMAR? We can’t understand that vomit you spittled up on the keyboard. Let us translate:
Power Line and a bunch of other shitty sites blow WALNUTS! Wonkette has Truck Nutz as large as Mark Penn is fat, and is easily kicking our lame ass. Wonkette readers are good at multi-tasking: they can not work AND play games at the same time. Our readers should only be so lucky.
HA-HA! Get a life and a job, Power Line losers! No, wait, the opposite of that!
As an aside, what these vitural eco-car thingies need is a pair of user-customizable, electronic TruckNutz, obvs.
Perhaps if you took a sharpie to your monitor…
But in Washington State, we no can haz atheism: Missing atheist sign found in Washington state.
I was able to get pushed into the green netherworld outside the games boundaries by another car. I’m going 75mph in reverse in some sort of limbo.
Well in Mayberry, you know we always give the truck drivers an extra five miles an hour so they can make it up Turner’s Grade.
I don’t envy the fact that you read PowerLine, even if it is for your “job.”
I refuse to believe Power Line isn’t a high school journalism class project. The writing is putting me to sleep.
Powerline can’t catch up because their readers all died of splodin’ heads when B. Hussein Osama won.
Ha ha, we’re getting a bunch of neocon pollution lovers to learn about ecofriendly driving.
If there was a game for running down little bunnies and tearing up endangered sea turtle nesting areas with a Monster Hummer, Powerline readers would win hands down.
Damnit - I CANNOT get hooked on that eco-thingy, I have to start working again next week
Pink Floyd: dayum you are older than dirt my friend. oh wait so am i, carry on
Barrett808: Some people I know are getting this card on the 25th.
Add another 35,467 to the total. I’ll be damned if I let some “actual” “serious” website win.
shanemcgowan: Shouldn’t that be Brown People, not Bunnies?
Who is these powerline people, anyway? Has anyone but our Fearlessly Responsible Editors ever even heard of them before Sir Jim the Virginal wrote this article?
I bet the entire readership consists of Dick Cheney. Think about it, have you seen him lately? That’s because he’s a-ecodrivin’!
SayItWithWookies: Nice! I must order today.
Man I suck at that game. I’m not helping our score here, people.
I had never seen or heard of Powerline before and now we are beating them. Ah life is good. What a buch of Dartmouth losers (safety school!)
rev_matt_y: I’ve heard there are whole teams of kids in China who you can pay like $5 an hour and they will play video games for you to get to the next level, get that jewel-encrusted 2-handed sword +5, etc.
Personally, if we start to lose, I think we just hack the damn thing. Or post snide comments at Powerline. (Dartmouth wankers)
For a bunch of drunks who spend all day on the internet we are shockingly competitive.
From the ‘About Us’ section of the Powerline website
“Paul supports Everton FC of the English Premier Soccer League, as well as the Washington Redskins, the Washington Wizards, and the University of Maryland basketball team.”
The English Premier SOCCER Leauge? What the hell is this guy talking about? I immediately get the impression he is one of those guys who tries to act impressive to his fellow ‘mericans because he has a connection to Ye Olde Worlde (e.g., a couple Palin length stopovers somewhere). And trying to look like he really knows what’s going on by supporting a more obscure team.
I could go on and on about this Paul Fussell like characteristic, but I’d just get silly.
Hasn’t Nate taught you fools anything? You have to normalize for the population size here (”PER CAPITA”) and rank with teams with at least 10 drivers (”STATISTICALLY SIGNIFICANT”). So here are the data (”REGRESSIONS”):
Rank Team Name Total Score Total Players Score Per Player
1 EcoGeek 634475 17 37322.06
2 Nate’s EcoDrivers 521769 14 37269.21
3 AutoblogGreen 2114666 60 35244.43
4 onezero 360961 11 32814.64
5 Treehugger 480654 15 32043.6
6 Power Line Readers 3347442 110 30431.29
7 Political Wire Readers 386989 14 27642.07
8 Wonkette Readers 24101670 878 27450.65
9 TPM Readers 1533415 63 24339.92
In conclusion, Wonkette Readers has a 1.1% of winning this thing by dint of having such a large mass of sucky drivers.
I believe Powerline is “written” by an attorney here in good ol’ Minnesota, where we have a regrettably high pass rate for the bar exam. What’s even more pathetic is that the local mainstream media (please excuse my temporary lapse into Kos-dom)treats them as a contender whenever they report on local political blogs - it’s so important to have “balance” dontcha know.
Borat: If you are a woman, you are my soulmate for alluding to Paul Fussell, who I worship. “Class” is the defining book about America. I have learned so much from it, and continue to.
If you are a man, I may have to reconsider this whole heterosexuality thing.
Sometime next week, after all you IsLameOhFashionist Wonkers finally tire of this online game, go visit the L33t of the free flash games at AdultSwim. I recommend trying: “Five Minutes To Kill Yourself” or “Bible Fight” first.
We’ve got a mandate.
naveed: I’m horny for all things penguin related, but if we are going to get serious about this, we are going to get serious.
As someone pointed out in a previous post, Nate “I feel uncomfortable masturbating” Silver’s team has only 12 people in it — an incredibly small sample size, and thus, not representative of the overall population (of Nate Silver cronies), and is thus no good (in the technical sense).
Another problem is this: the stats above tell us how many players, but it doesn’t tell us HOW MANY TIMES they played. For all we know 1 member from team Nate played the game 440,000 times, and got 1 point at the end of each game.
In other words, Nate Silver drives like an old woman.
I hate those idiots with a passion, but I swear to christ I’m never going on that game again. EVAR.
HughJennicks: 5 mins to suicide does rule.
How do I know im playing as a Wonkette reader and not some daily kos piece of shit?
Dave J.: Class is one of the best books ever written. Although I thought ‘Class X’ or whatever was a bit of a cop-out at the end. I’ll have to pick me up another copy next time I’m back in the motherland.
I’m afraid I can’t help you out in the ladies department, but I could dress up like Snowbilly. I’d love to know Fussell’s opinion on her + her brood. That would be a book that could even top Class.
I cannot possibly play another fucking round of that damn eco-car game. Oh who the fuck am i kidding, one more round….
I would play but I can’t let anything get in the way of my obsessive solitaire playing. I’m old skool like that.
Evidently, according to wikipedia, Power Line is a 3-blogger supergroup that broke off from Duran Duran sometime in the 80’s.
p-Sludge ofTheElves: In German, their name is Kraftwerk.
Ah, Powerline has opened up a discussion thread on ecodriving:
http://www.plnewsforum.com/index.php/forums/viewthread/44675/
I kicked it off clean enough to hopefully get their old college competitive spirit going.
So if you’re bored this weekend, go over there and tell em to Suck It.
Depending on how drunk or stoned I get later I may go back with a few TruckNut$ like posts until I get banned.
Tyrone Biggums: Why is ’surge’ the GOP answer to everything?
Been desperately trying to do a do-over–again and again. Can’t even reach the finishing line. Sorry, I let all my Wonkette team players down by grading the curve downwards!
Like my friend at church Hindrocket of Powerline, I suck at this game, keep scoring zero. But I am enjoying wallowing in suckiness. This is fun. And playing Ecodrive has successfully kept me from grading more English essays. Hindrocket once told me he doesn’t follow popular culture, and when I see him at church today I will remind him that he now IS popular culture because he has tried to rally his Powerline minions to participate in a pleasantly mindless video game. (And what is Powerline but popular culture, anyway because everyone knows the Internets are us, and we are popular, and we are culture.) All John needs to do to ensure that his Ecodrive “surge” is working is to start swearing a little on his blog and writing less perfectly and more snarkily and silly-ish; then some of us Wonketters might be wiling to play for his team occasionally. I suppose Powerline does not need my endless zero scores, though. In the meantime, we are kicking their sorry conservative butts, and I mean that in good way. That’s why, by the way, their site is all black and blue, you know. Those little lightening-strike-thingies at the top of the page are jolts of pain from drunken unemployed Wonkette Ecodrive winners and losers like me. Note to self: Must sober up before church.