Wonkette
CONSOLATION PRIZE: Of all the secretaries of commerce in American History, the only ones anybody has ever heard of are Herbert Hoover, Ron Brown and Norm Mineta. The first is known for making the Depression, the second for being killed in some random plane crash, the third for … doing 9/11? [U.S. Secretary of Commerce]
Oh Jesus, Cashill. You have but not one leg to stand on, you hack.
Wikipedia is truly the greatest source of knowledge on the planet after our beloved Wonkette. Where else outside a hallway in the Commerce Department building in DC would we be able to find a grouping of portraits of all the secretaries of commerce going back to the stone age?
Whatever. Being in the Administration of Hope is still better than being Governor of New Mexico.
Great. Now some wetback is in charge of promoting economic growth. Grab your wallets ladies and gents - the illegal immigrants are coming to a neighborhood near you!
But then he has to live in the Chamber of Commerce, and hence must be very important.
Also, there might be sniper fire.
Shut up guys, I’d KILL to be cashier at the White House.
wx insider: My snark-sense appears to be on the fritz this morning, ’cause that just sounds offensive. Please tell me that was sarcasm and not a channeling of Lou Dobbs . . .
wx insider: that’s “stately, plump wetback” to you, Sir.
wx insider: Of course they are; it’s not like you’re trimming your own hedges.
Norm Mineta’s middle name was Yoshio? That’s gotta be worth something. I’ll also note that there was a Juanita sometime way back in that list, so it seems that like landscaping this is a job for which people are usually thinking they need to get a Mexican.
Let’s hope Richardson can do better than Hoover in an economic crisis. Or the incumbent, someone allegedly named “Carlos Gutierrez.” Shouldn’t the SecCom have an Amurrican-sounding name like, say, “Bill Richardson”?
And are we happy with the job Secretary Gutierrez is doing? He’s certainly keeping a low profile while the whole financial world collapses.
Oh, right, he’s a loyal Bushie.
NoWireHangers: NM is actually a very nice state. It’s sort of an even trade for him. Now Napolitano going to DHS, THAT was a trade-up. And I hate her for feeding us to the local republicans.
V572625694: There’s been no commerce for him to be secretary over, so it makes sense that he has nothing to do.
Also, he’s afraid that Paulson will steal his wallet and send it to Goldman Sachs.
Talk about over-qualified. Let’s hope Richardson doesn’t get so bored that he has to start any new hobbies like crack or interns.
4tehlulz: Plus he’s a Cubano, son of a plantation-owner refugee from Castro. Can we please get these people out of our government? ‘Cause there’s some awesome beaches in Cuba.
Henry Wallace was also S of C. FDR gave him the job as a sop for kicking him off the ticket in ‘44 and replacing him with Truman. Getting him confirmed was a bitch. Getting the Dems to nominate him as VP in ‘40 was also a bitch. In fact, trying to appoint him to anything was just about damn near impossible - except for Secretary of Agriculture (where he used a Ouija board to set the price of corn - or something like that). Let’s face it Commerce is for losers. Let’s all have a moment of silence for Bill Richardson because no one is ever going to hear from him again.
The first order of business for Richardson is a new “business climate thermometer” based on the famous South of the Border signs in I-95, featuring the Secretary in a sombrero and Frito Bandito mustache:
“Beel sez: “Chili tonight, but MOCH better TAMALE!”
Oh and I forgot Harry Hopkins. He left Commerce to go onto being FDR’s right-hand man - which was sort of like sitting at the right hand of God (on wheels). A promotion for sure.
V572625694: Pretty sure Guttierez was hired on the basis of his chili recipe. The Bushes love the trappings of Texas culture.
wx insider: DEY TUKER JERBS!!
well that’s not so bad. i thought latinos only got HUD secretary positions, so it’s a step up.
Market began tanking as this information got posted. Coincidence? I think not. Very brief honeymoon, in any event.
I am also forgetting Maurice Stans, who was peripherally involved in Watergate and was indicted in 1973 for perjury and obstruction of justice, but was acquitted the following year. Boy the Commerce Department is the Bermuda Triangle of the cabinet. Let’s all form a prayer circle for Richardson. Why does Hopey hate him so much?
Serolf Divad: Oh, hey, and let’s not forget wapedia.mobi so you can take Wikipedia wherever you go :). Like trivia night. Not that I would cheat, of course, being an honorable gigolo of the highest caliber.
Well, it gets this fat mess out of New Mexico (which will now have a woman Gov by the by). Commerce is kinda like “Vice President of Pahr-tay”. You can do what you want and no one really knows/cares. Plus, he’s in charge of NOAA (!) and the Census (important in 2010) meaning he can call down hurricanes on Orange County during the dicennial count, therby lowering the numbers of Repubs in that goshforsaken heckhole. Not a bad gig for a guy known primarily for a)drinking his weight and b)getting M Lewinsky a job in NYC.