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FRATS YO

Sigma Chi Overlords Will Maintain Grip On Georgia Senate Seat

Blech.At the University of Georgia, a supersecret society of kinky hedonist plutocrats has spent years grooming its minions for high public office. This society is called “the Sigma Chi fraternity,” and both Jim Martin and Saxby Chambliss were members in the early 1960s. To what foul overlords have Martin and Chambliss pledged their undying fealty, and what will this mean for the United States Senate when one of them is elected to represent the great state of Georgia?

Probably all it means is that, 40 years ago, both of these guys liked to drink a lot and get it on with gals wearing cone bras. But still, this is a great opportunity for Sigma Chi to shine on the national stage!

The chapter has declined to officially endorse either senatorial candidate, so lord only knows how voters will decide, without the informed political guidance of a fraternity chapter. Go Bulldogs, etc etc.

SENATE RACE: Opponents share frat connection [RedandBlack.com]


10:47 AM on Thu November 20 2008
By Sara K. Smith
4970 Views

  1. heroinmule says at 10:53 am, November 20th, 2008

    I can’t tell you exactly how, but I predict that Tim Tebow will win this seat.

  2. StripesAndPlaids says at 10:56 am, November 20th, 2008

    Insert Sweetheart of Sigma Chi joke here.

  3. ManchuCandidate says at 10:56 am, November 20th, 2008

    It’s no fun with two frat brothers on opposing sides. It means that neither of them will talk shit about the initiation rites of the other and explain to the public why his particular frat had goats, mentions of Baal, assless chaps, female underwear and corn cobs in its initiation rituals.

  4. God preserve us all from frat boys and their strange fascination with paddles.

  5. masterdebater says at 10:58 am, November 20th, 2008

    I know there is a reason I should care about what goes on in Georgia…what was it again? Other than the red-neckery and rampant inbreeding, I mean.

  6. StripesAndPlaids: Saying something like that implies that there are tons of these jokes and that everyone knows them. Well, consider me the Donovan McNabb of Sigma Chi sweetheart jokes and DO TELL!

  7. bluetom00 says at 11:03 am, November 20th, 2008

    Or get it on with each other. As is the wont of frat children.

  8. Dawn Keipuntsh says at 11:04 am, November 20th, 2008

    Larry Munson should call the election, and tell the winner to “hunker down”

  9. hemlockecho says at 11:04 am, November 20th, 2008

    This Senate race is just like that time Saxby and Jim played gay chicken back in the dorms. They got so close that they made out, and now they have to rematch.

  10. ioksotot23 says at 11:04 am, November 20th, 2008

    fratricide, a soft glow ahead, like the end of a tunnel, the on-coming, the fraternal orders, the spanking in dark secret all male beer garden basements…..didn’t they invent gang rape?….(just youthful indiscretions, really, keg stands and slipped mickeys don’t count)….fillibuster proof—IT’S WORTH IT!!!!

  11. roundofapplause says at 11:12 am, November 20th, 2008

    John Ensign from Nevada is a sigma chi too. How high does the eagle fly?

  12. masterdebater: 60 seats. That’s why you should care. If Martin wins, and Franken wins, Democrats get 60 seats, and then nothing can stop our radical liberal gay socialist Muslin agenda. MUHAHAHAHAHA.

  13. The Cold Sea says at 11:22 am, November 20th, 2008

    Min: Yeah, but televise it first! I’d love me some frat boy teevee.

  14. AngryBlakGuy says at 11:30 am, November 20th, 2008

    …Sigma Chi? Isn’t that the Dojo from the “Karate Kid”?!

  15. thank you for this blog.

  16. PerhapsSo says at 11:39 am, November 20th, 2008

    My brother-in-law is a Sigma Chi guy, so I can without hesitation answer that the overlord would be beer.

  17. The Helvetica Scenario says at 11:40 am, November 20th, 2008

    AngryBlakGuy: Get him a body bag, yeah!

  18. AngryBlakGuy: Strike first, strike hard, no mercy, SIR!

  19. So they’ve both teabagged the other while drunk and passed out? Good, then this losing won’t be awkward for one of them.

    http://thesebastards.blogspot.com/

  20. Hi, Jim Martin, Rush Chairman, damn glad to meet you.

  21. SeminoleInDior says at 11:57 am, November 20th, 2008

    roundofapplause: My brother, I seek true friendship…

  22. thursdaynext27 says at 12:24 pm, November 20th, 2008

    Wasn’t Sigma Chi the UGA frat that got in huge trouble for a party in the early 90’s? I was at UGA from 89-93 and I remember one of the frats (w/ notable politicians as alumni) getting busted for party that had like 3 times the number of people allowed by the fire marshall.

    What I remember most about the incident? Flock of Seagulls was the band. And UGA softened their punishment from expulsion to severe suspension, allegedly at request of those alumni.

  23. Bukkake?

  24. thursdaynext27: Welcome to south-hating librul media town fellow Alum. I’m actually from Athens, so all I can remember about the Frats are the drunken debauchery, date rape, and puking on my home town.

    SeminoleInDior: Don’t think the Sororities get off any easier.

  25. whatever_dc says at 12:41 pm, November 20th, 2008

    at the university of texas when i was there back in the 20s the sigma chi’s were all closet case homosexuals…oops that was the lambda guys. never mind

    and anyway — didn’t georgia get taken over by russia the other day? when did the soviet union allow voting?

  26. StripesAndPlaids says at 12:46 pm, November 20th, 2008

    rmontcal:
    Q: What’s the difference between Sigma Chi Sweethearts and garbage?
    A: Garbage gets taken out once a week.

  27. Capitol Hillbilly says at 1:18 pm, November 20th, 2008

    Sissy Saxby was also the Sweetheart of Sigma Chi.

  28. PeteJayhawk v2.0 says at 1:49 pm, November 20th, 2008

    Sigma Chi? Awesome - whoever wins the runoff needs to throw a Derby Days party at the Capitol. 30-packs of Keystone Light for everyone!

  29. I’m in Atlanta. Get me the hell out of here, please.

  30. thursdaynext27 says at 8:59 pm, November 20th, 2008

    trondant: That sounds right. That next Monday, the question on everyone’s mind: Flock of Seagulls is still together?

  31. josereyes.theroof says at 9:40 pm, November 20th, 2008

    David Letterman will be moving taping to Atlanta’s FOX Theatre for the duration of the period prior run-off.

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