Wonkette
SECURITY THROUGH TYRANNY! “As our economic system continues to collapse and it’s increasingly evident that the federal bailout of Wall Street has done nothing to calm investors or businesses, we have to assume the new police state will be put into place sometime this month, before the presidential elections, and that John McCain will become our new crazy old dictator guy. Will it really be so bad?” [AOL Political Machine]
oh. i don’t know. ask JEFFGOLDBLUM.
Pssh, like Cheney would let McCain run the coming police state.
All hail emperor Dick Cheney!
Can I get Jackboots in blue suede?
Okay, but if we invade Poland, can I get some good kielbasa?
You’ve convinced me Ken. Fascism is the only way to protect our freedoms.
Especially if this entails Mooslini in thigh high leather boots and tight, form-fitting black uniform. That’s change I can believe in.
Ken, have a happy, on me:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SfK9V24JFkE
Wow, nice Glamour Shots pose Walnuts!
facehead: In the new economy, those animals will be dinner.
Terrifying police states provide ample opportunity for hot rebel sex in underground tunnels.
Gee, who’da thunk that the administration that told us the Iraqi army was about to get into boats and sail to America and attack the east coast with remotely-guided airplanes spewing chemical weapons, that wanted to cancel the 2004 elections ’cause we were at war, and that said if you vote for Kerry we’ll get hit by the terrorists again would possibly stoop to exaggerating threats to further their own ends? I mean, you think you can trust an evil overlord and then — poof! The smoking gun that becomes a papier-mache replica of a mushroom cloud.
Will it really be so bad, you ask?
Fuck, Yes! I answer.
When did the Age of Aquarius turn to shit?
Okay, so I’m planning an insurgency.
There will be the Jesus insurgency. Not me. I’m not a Crusadey type.
I think I might fit with the Vaguely Bored insurgency.
Stupid and Drunk insurgency? That’s worth a try.
But probably, I’ll wind up in the It’s All Hopeless, But I’m Gonna Make You Pay Muthafuckas insurgency.
Yeah, that’s the ticket.
facehead: snif, that made me cry, why can’t the world be a nice place?
SayItWithWookies: yeah regarding the bailout - why the hell would anyone believe ANY thing from the mouth of george bush (even if we can’t see cheny moving his mouth?)
Delicious: I LIKE STUPID AND DRUNK
I for one welcome our frail, tumor-faced overlord.
edgydrifter: I have to agree, but only because Childers said nothing.
For all you grumpy-guses out there (i.e. Ken), who are always worried about the “economy” (what a funny made-up word!) and “the police state” (come on now, why shouldn’t the police have thier own state?), I give you:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9tpsHzO1siw&feature=related
(for those who love all wordz ending with a ‘z’, check the name of the person who posted this)
Just the other day a guy at the Halethorpe station was passing out fliers from Lyndon Larouche, stating that Booschey is mobilizing the military inside of the US in order to enforce the bailout. So I says to myself, “Self, why would they need an army to enforce the bailout?”
So, then I get an email from the American Freedom Campaign about Booschey mobilizing the Army inside of the US, and how this is a slippery slope toward an ever more police-y police state. Not that we’re not already living in one j(ust ask the pepper spray soaked protesters from the GOP Con-Vention.)
So I says to myself, “Self, still, even though the “Enforce the Bailout” clap-trap sounds like total bullshit, why do they need to mobilize the Army INSIDE of the United States?”
The answer?
We’re all fucked.
http://www.breaknutz.com ????
But, then again, I hear they’re perfecting the recipe for Soma.
As long as my kids aren’t allergic to it, I guess it won’t be THAT bad.
(Seriously, though, it looks like out fuck-ed-ness is gaining altitude on the fuck-ed-ness scale.)
What about that sheriff appearing @ the Palin rally in uniform??? isn’t that unethical?
The police (actually, private firms such as Blackwater & Wackenhut) will be the only economy sector that expands under McCain/Palin. What isn’t privatized will be sourced to ‘faith-based’ (vastly nutjob Christian) firms. At least in the vast Alaskan wilderness you’re still permitted a small amount of cannabis to blunt the cold winds (of fate, if nothing else) but prayer groups for the masses will be our only solace.
Sarah will be shooting wolves from black helicopters.
Hey, not that it would, but on the outside chance that the site goes down tomorrow night during the debate- although I’m sure those servers are super awesome ready- here’s the address for the chat site:
http://wonkette.chatango.com/
God Forbid.
TeddyS: Wolfmeats might be staple of our diets in a few years. Palin’s very forward thinking as far as world food supplies go.
Now that the good old USA is no longer a G8 industrialized nation, it is only fitting that the world’s newest 3rd world country have a police state. After all, a banana republic ain’t a banana republic without some social order. Hail, Ivan McCainovich! Hail Saralina Polinski! Dude, who drank my vodka?
America is starting to go down the tubes? Time for me to start working on my stand-up comedy act:
In China, you take loan from banker.
In America, banker take loan from you!
It’s far from perfect (I still need to translate the act into Mandarin and Cantonese), but I figure I’ll have an act ready to go by the time China develops its own Branson.
“Ken Layne is the managing editor of Wonkette and a famous optimist.”
Good because I thought I was the only person ready to trade my 401K in for a pallet of ramen noodles and head for the bunker.
If you crave true chat pandemonium:
http://wonkette.chatango.com/
I am facehead and I approve this chat room.
irisheyes: much thanks irish eyes
TJBeck: I can see it now. Two weeks from now, Cheney will address the nation. He will tell us that a month before, Bush had come to him and asked him to search for the best person to run this country given the terrible shape we are in. Dick searched and searched, and realize, in the end, only Dick could lead. So he and Bush are now announcing the suspension of the Constitution, and that Dick was in charge. He will then announce that he was bringing in Haliburton to run everything, “since they have experience in things like this.”
He will then rip the head off of a puppy and drink its blood, laughing maniacally. FOX News will be the only channel you get on TV. Hannity will call it a brilliant move, while Linbaugh will say that it is about time someone returned to the Conservatism of Reagan.
Security through trannys???
Just saying, I for one welcome our new overlords.
http://www.alternet.org/blogs/peek/99433/incredible_documentary_footage_of_mass_arrest_in_st._paul/
Am I the only one starting to feel sorry for Walnuts? He’s really become a pathetic mockery… He’s going to be like Dukakis or McGovern after this…
grendel: That’s insulting to Duke and George…they weren’t scum like Walnuts!.
mookworthjwilson: How about like Nixon, minus the breakin?
THIS is a McCain / Palin Afterlife
http://athyrius1.deviantart.com/art/Palin-McCain-Dark-Ages-97398612
HIS NAME IS GRAND PA NAUGHT DICTATOR.
There’s a possibility of a standing army fucking every one of us in the place. The place where only daddy understands, until damnation time. Damnation will commence on July 4, 2012, when we all rejoice at the local IHOP.
Ken: How do I reserve a spot in your tent city?
shortsshortsshorts: Trying to get banned again?
Also, I wish some of those commenters in that AOL thread opened accounts here. Their input would be much appreciated.
mookworthjwilson: tyrannical tranny’s
shortsshortsshorts: If you get banned again, you are on your own.
tunamelt: If you get banned, it’s related to daddy, who cannot console you right now.
shortsshortsshorts: is that like the drunk dozens shorts?
Your daddy’s so ugly…
Rodney Badger: I love posting comments on AOL that I think are way over the top and then reading them in context. My comments can never out crazy the crazies, no matter how hard I try.
shortsshortsshorts: My daddy buys me ice cream, after, Shorts. What are you gonna do?
tunamelt: Spike your ice cream.
Palin wants to spoof Fey on SNL
This is coming from a pitbull who watches SNL with the volume down. Fey doesn’t exactly go off Palin’s own script, so I’m not sure what she’s going to spoof. She’ll be booed out the studio anyways.
Here’s a tasteless Sarah blingee
facehead:Of course Sarah Palin would have grabbed her AR15 when she saw this:
http://www.roundmountaingroup.com/images/racoons.jpg
Johnny Zhivago: The best shall remain http://www.pathetic.com/ … where dreams go to die
Here’s what John McCain needs!
http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_GOA1dlyi0Zc/SOpQ_9-vpuI/AAAAAAAAADc/TCZj6V3UZJs/s1600-h/thorazine.jpg
wow, the comments here at wonkette are so much better than that aol place. I mean they don’t even have any truck nutz!
Chuck Fildren: Behold the glory that is TRUCKNUTZ!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=48_rdb-WRt4
I think there’s a good chance I will be allowed to keep all three of my jobs. That being case, even with my crushing debt & tiny apartment–I will be doing better than many of you…
bahahahahahahahaha.
HuskyMescan: The only way I could tolerate the real Sarah Palin on SNL is if they ask her to do a walk-on and ambush her with real questions.
I have a hard time seeing Tina Fey agreeing to do an embarrassing real-person-standing-by-impersonator. The only one of those I can remember being funny is Norm MacDonald and Bob Dole.
Lol, you guys are saying that like the Republicans actually have the competence, popular support or unused military assets to actually run a police state.
UglyLoser: “I have a hard time seeing Tina Fey agreeing to do an embarrassing real-person-standing-by-impersonator.”
What about Eddie Murphy and Stevie Wonder? Murphy criticized Wonder, “no, man, Stevie goes like this….”
A Palin/Fey skit might be that Fey wins a contest to take the Vice President hunting. Fey gives her tips, like, “that’s OK if you’re just hunting quail.” At the end, Fey hangs her from a tree, with hand cuffs on each ankle and over the lowest branch. And then, Fey doesn’t know Palin’s safe word. So Sarah keeps screaming, “WALNUTZ!”
Sabre_Justice: Lol, you guys are saying that like the Republicans actually have the competence, popular support or unused military assets to actually run a police state.
When has that stopped them before?
Sabre_Justice: ha ha ha! Too true. They don’t have the competence to hand out bottles of water to hurricane victims. How are they going to mobilize nationwide marshal law?
Worlds End: Damn Hippie park hoggers…
I posted this a while ago..it made me shudder and I am now cowering in fear…Viva la Revolution!
villageatrois: If they kiss onscreen, it’s epic win for the GOP.
dano: Well, the difference is probably that they don’t have any real interest in handing out water bottles and saving poor peoples’ lives and shit, but they’re *very* interested in finally taking over the country by force as they’ve always dreamed. They would, admittedly, probably fuck up big somehow, but not for lack of enthusiasm.
Yaaaahh! Oh, wait, I thought that said “Security Through Tranny.” But it didn’t. Very different, that. At ease.
UglyLoser: Yeah, I don’t think Fey would agree, but then again , it’s all about the benjamins with NBC/GE.
how can there be work camps, when there is no work?
capitol hillbilly: Absolutely WIN. WIN WIN WIN. You may have my first child.