• February 9, 2012

And the crowd goes wild!If this is “warm greeting” from a “cheering crowd,” we are eager to see what a “terrified reception by conscripted child slaves” looks like. After this photo was taken, these kiddies went back to renovating his Girdwood mansion, again, for free, because Ted Stevens is a sadist. [AP via Washington Post]

{ 52 comments }

InsertSnarkyReferenceLater August 5, 2008 at 10:59 am

i doubt even larry craig could get as warm a greeting from those clearly terrified children.

AngryBlakGuy August 5, 2008 at 10:59 am

…did he steal Fidel Castro’s uniform? And now that I think about it; is that Elian?

AfghanVet August 5, 2008 at 10:59 am

IS that an SS uniform he has on? Is this some weird Alskan Sound of Music scene?

SayItWithWookies August 5, 2008 at 11:00 am

That’s “warm for Alaska.” Remember To Build a Fire? You know it’s forty below when your spit is frozen before it hits the ground.

ManchuCandidate August 5, 2008 at 11:02 am

The ghost of Nicolai Ceausescu, TASS and Kim Il Jong approves.

JamesMichaelCurley August 5, 2008 at 11:06 am

In Ted Stevens, never has the term “Big Dipper” been more accurately applied.

BadNewsJack August 5, 2008 at 11:06 am

Denial is an ugly thing.

shortsshortsshorts August 5, 2008 at 11:06 am

Crooked old bastard. Why isn’t Alaska in the axis of evil yet?

AngryBlakGuy August 5, 2008 at 11:08 am

…I wonder how many Valiums they had slip into those kids Kool-Aid to get them to stand next to a zombified corpse?!

Darehead August 5, 2008 at 11:08 am

Pity the child slaves being pimped out for their master.

“But, tears were not the things to find their way to Senator Stevens’ soul; his heart was waterproof.”
–Charles Dickens.

Political Addict August 5, 2008 at 11:09 am

A lot of conservatives have their long knives out for Stevens. The folks at National Review have been ready to kiss him goodbye for some time.

AngryBlakGuy August 5, 2008 at 11:09 am

[re=51958]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: …along with W.Virginia and Texas?!

AfghanVet August 5, 2008 at 11:10 am

You know someone in civilian government is guilty when they start wearing clothing that is distinctly military in style. Maybe he is going to start a coup?

freakishlystrong August 5, 2008 at 11:11 am

“Children of the Forlorn”
Somebody think of the Children!

NotUrEvryDayWEzl August 5, 2008 at 11:11 am

[re=51958]shortsshortsshorts[/re]: It is. If you draw a line from Basra to Pyongyang, you hit Juneau. Seriously.

AfghanVet August 5, 2008 at 11:11 am

[re=51964]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: Kansas, not West Virginia.

Uncle Al August 5, 2008 at 11:12 am

Hang in there, Ted. Don’t let them take the nomination away from you. I think you can stay in the Senate even if you’re in prison.

Gopherit v2.0 August 5, 2008 at 11:16 am

It’s apropos to see Ted dressed like a Third World Dictator surrounded by his “adoring” constituents. Alaska is a Banana Republic without the Bananas.

Canuckledragger August 5, 2008 at 11:17 am

Pitch for a new reality show: “Cellmates” starring Ted Stevens and James Trafficante. The hook is that they’re both “innocent.”

Servo August 5, 2008 at 11:19 am

Oyster flavored ice cream would get bigger smiles on those kids.

Not_So_Much August 5, 2008 at 11:21 am

Jeebus. You’re 84, batshit crazy and corrupt as shit. Stop scaring the children and start re-enacting “Into the Wild”…

Doglessliberal August 5, 2008 at 11:26 am

[re=51960]AngryBlakGuy[/re]: He told them he’d eat them. Or that he’d cut off their families’ oil checks from AK, which might actually have been scarier.

magic titty August 5, 2008 at 11:28 am

What’s with the jumpsuit?
And why are those children afraid for their lives?
Will they be walked out to the Wicker Man after the huge great speech from Big Chief Anchorage?

WadISay August 5, 2008 at 11:28 am

If I were Ted Stevens, I would be doing a little thinking about whose bitch I wanted to be in the federal pen.

Terry August 5, 2008 at 11:32 am

They had to fill the stage with children in order to make Uncle Ted seem taller than your average hobbit. Eeeeevil hobbit.

Doglessliberal August 5, 2008 at 11:32 am

[re=51994]WadISay[/re]: Eh, Bush will commute his sentence, just like he did Scooter’s. The Moran in Chief has nothing to lose at this point.

Servo August 5, 2008 at 11:34 am

[re=51993]magic titty[/re]:
Those kids realized that without Big Daddy Ted bringin’ home the pork, they’re only future is on crabbing boats in the Bering Strait.

V572625694 August 5, 2008 at 11:36 am

[re=51966]AfghanVet[/re]: Stevens and Inouye could lead it from their wheelchairs. Oh, and that other master military porkmeister, Ike Skelton, who actually uses a wheelchair.

magic titty August 5, 2008 at 11:44 am

[re=52001]Servo[/re]: But they can make upwards of $10K per summer on those boats. It’s just like the Amistad, except colder with no uprisings.
It’s only six hours of shackles and lashings per week.

WhatTheHeck August 5, 2008 at 11:47 am

Where are the cute animals? You gotta have cute animals and kids (and a boy scout uniform) for a photo-op so people won’t ask hard questions.

Guppy06 August 5, 2008 at 11:52 am

Uncle Ted is to Alaska what Uncle Joe was to the other side of the Bering Strait.

And you know he’ll get reelected again this year.

Canmon (the Inadequate) August 5, 2008 at 11:56 am

I’m having trouble telling all the Republican scandals apart. Is this the bathroom guy, the Abramoff guy, the guy who dresses up as a baby or the guy that got us into Iraq on false evidence?

thefrontpage August 5, 2008 at 12:02 pm

Someone please get this guy, Palin, and all of the other thousands of corrupt politicians in Alaska into a jail in the Arctic Circle as soon as possible so some honest people can try and run this wayward territory.

And who these nimrods “cheering” Stevens and public corruption? What a bunch of morons!

Doglessliberal August 5, 2008 at 12:07 pm

[re=52019]thefrontpage[/re]: they love him! There was an article the other day about Alaskans openly lamenting the fact that if he goes, they won’t get billions in pork anymore. They were shamelessly and happily calling it pork. The article also cited someone as saying his studies showed 30% of jobs in Alaska were tied to pork brought home by Stevens. That sounds absurd, but when you look at the numbers on how much he has gotten appropriated, you believe it.

thefrontpage August 5, 2008 at 12:15 pm

I know all about the pork, Stevens’ career, his background, his pork projects, etc., etc., etc. That is irrelevant now. People need to know that one of the contractors who worked on Stevens’ house turned and told all to investigators, freely admitting that work was done in exchange for favors. Others have also cooperated with investigators and have admitted to rampant corruption in Alaska politics involving Stevens, Stevens’ son, and literally dozens of state politicians. Those are facts. Facts.

So some b.s. pork projects do not matter.

What matters is that morons are cheering public corruption and a corrupt politician. A bunch of b.s. projects become moot at this point.

Who are these nimrods cheering Stevens and public corruption. What a bunch of morons.

Cape Clod August 5, 2008 at 12:17 pm

OK, for public corruption, you trot out little kids from some rat bag day care. For a sexual entanglement, you prop up the heavily medicated wifey. But if you invade a country for trumped up reasons, you just hide in your office and let Cheney snarl at people.

shortsshortsshorts August 5, 2008 at 12:26 pm

[re=51968]NotUrEvryDayWEzl[/re]: You’re totally right! In a triangular axis Alaska is in fact part of said axis. Goddamn snow-loving terrorists.

Servo August 5, 2008 at 12:28 pm

[re=52011]magic titty[/re]:
…and no XBOX or texting.

weirdiowasculpture August 5, 2008 at 12:30 pm

Jeez, the caption says those are his grandchildren! Can you imagine what must take place when they get left alone with grampa in his cabin on a long cold winter night while mommy and daddy are off getting shitfaced at some rubber chicken dinner? Those kids look like PTSD survivors if ever I’ve seen them. I’ll bet half of them wind up on death row.

dano August 5, 2008 at 12:47 pm

I just got great news!!! I’ve been awarded the contract to renovate Ted Steven’s jail cell.

Doglessliberal August 5, 2008 at 12:59 pm

[re=52028]thefrontpage[/re]: my point was, they don’t care of he cornholes moose against their will (the mooses’ will) or drinks the blood of babies–as long as he brings home the money, he can do whatever he wants, including getting Viking stoves in exchange for various and sundry favors.

V572625694 August 5, 2008 at 12:59 pm

[re=52028]thefrontpage[/re]: When every single resident gets a check from the state just for being alive, it kinds of makes them addicted to the government handout. They could have used the so-called “permanent fund” of oil revenue to build all the idiot bridges to nowhere they wanted.

Doglessliberal August 5, 2008 at 1:00 pm

[re=52053]dano[/re]: get paid up front

donner_froh August 5, 2008 at 1:00 pm

[re=52028]thefrontpage[/re]: Try Chicago where politicians have bee re-elected after being convicted of public corruption.

TGY August 5, 2008 at 1:04 pm

Well, yeah, he’s shovelled enough pork into the permafrost to be given a hearty greeting by his constituents.

shortsshortsshorts August 5, 2008 at 1:16 pm

[re=52028]thefrontpage[/re]: As the Republican base loses faith in itself, corruption is now advocated as a platform winning strategy.

yellowdogdem August 5, 2008 at 1:42 pm

Those kids look like they belong to a polygamous cult.”Yes, Father Ted. Whatever you say, Father Ted.”

Doglessliberal August 5, 2008 at 1:53 pm

[re=52077]donner_froh[/re]: but not pubic corruption?

Borat August 5, 2008 at 2:26 pm

those kids look more depressed than they would be if they were in church

sanantonerose August 5, 2008 at 2:43 pm

Baked Alaska!

Mediahohoho August 5, 2008 at 2:54 pm

He’s Republican. He fucked all those kids in the ass vigorously.

Jukesgrrl August 6, 2008 at 2:22 am

[re=52017]Canmon (the Inadequate)[/re]: It doesn’t matter. They’ll all get pardons in January. Diapers and toe-tapping all around!

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