Wonkette
MAIN STREAM MEDIAS: Here, after we’re already bored of the story, are 53 news articles about the mill worker John Edwards and his weird Beverly Hills hotel bathroom adventure and “Rielle Hunter” and Adultery and bastard children. [Google News]
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BORING. I’m going drinking to make some scandals of my own. No bastard children though.
If only he had the bathroom adventure with the other Hunter…
Duncan!
I bet they were just swapping hair care tips as opposed to bodily fluids. I mean really, can you imagine little Johnny Edwards doing anything that would mess up his coif?
Look, I still say that if you look at her picture, Bill Clinton is perhaps the only man in America that would hit that. Oh, and I would have a lot more respect for John Edwards if he would use that as his defense.
I think Mittens and John Edwards should have a barber duel, a la Sweeny Todd.
This would make the alleged love child the bastard of a son of a son of a mill-worker. And a rich divorcee.
Ugh, sorry, to many sons. That would be the bastard of a son of a millworker. And a rich divorcee.
It’s a good thing we still have our head Wonkette to keep these MSM wankers honest.
This story is more overblown than a swanky haircut or worse — a three-time losing NC Senator getting a buzz cut up against an antique Brazilian cherrywood plant stand at a boutique hotel. Like the BH doesn’t have a beauty salon down there in the basement…
Just who is this John Edwards guy and why does it matter? I have lost track of Obama’s flying unicorn between Paris and London, and goddammit, I am upset. Help me here.
I’m sorry, I don’t believe it. There is no way a man with that good of hair is not gay.
Er, I think your frienemies over at RedState called you a “right wing blog.”
Did I miss something?
I’m so proud of wee Johnny. He proved what a Democrat he is by having an affair with a lady. A pretty lady! And he has proof!
John Edwards had an affair with Tommy Shaw of Styx! Domo!
Since it is evidently not a black love child, I am not innarrested.
Hey, Björk wrote a song about Rielle Hunter!
http://youtube.com/watch?v=AfwBoumNpmc
Packherd: Here’s the quote:
And to date no mainstream paper has seen fit to cover the story beyond reporting on the fact that the ::gasp National Enquirer has reported this and ::gasp right wing blogs, like PuffHo (not a typo) and Wonkette, are talking about it.
Jim, now you can die happy. Of course, as a newly-crowned Republican, you’ll die lying in bed next to a naked, underage, Thai prostitute, but at least you’ll be happy.
loquaciousmusic: Bjork scares me. I am scared now.
Happy Fun Ball: You think that’s scary? Have you ever seen the one where Twizzlers come out of her ta-tas?
http://youtube.com/watch?v=LVHpBCjUu8M
loquaciousmusic: Really? I would probably watch that a few times if it was out there to be found. Did you ever see the suicide video that Bjork stalker madea few years ago, where he painted his face all creepy and the blew his brains out on camera as a tribute to her? Now that’s devotion to a cause! I’ll bet Jody Foster was jealous.
BOO! Especially when a “GOP operative” got caught in a prostitution sting in St. Paul (test driving the car before the convention?).
http://www.startribune.com/local/25880574.html?location_refer=Most%20Emailed:Homepage:8
No word if he was soliciting a woman, but if so it could be the man-bites-dog story of the year.
loquaciousmusic: I didn’t notice the link at first — thanks. Yep, she scares me.
SSSSSSSSSSSssnore. I wonder if NotUrEvryDayWEzl got laid tonight.
Yeah, but read down the article titles. “Alleged” “alleged” “alleged” “alleged” “confirmed…by Fox News.”
ronaldpagan: Actually, all that FauxNews is confirming is that Edwards was chased by a couple of National Enquirer reporters. The FauxNews story says that the lady’s kid belongs to one of Edwards’ staffers, but not to the former senator himself. Of course, the FauxNews story is written in a way to constantly repeat the Enquirer rumor without actually confirming or debunking it, but that’s Faux for you.
I almost feel bad for Republicans if this is the best they can come up with to bash Democrats with anymore. Almost.
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: I have been drinking (I have exceeded my 1 drink maximum) and I have a bag of plums and a fabulous new pair of chocolate brown bikini panties (size small) to show for the night’s revelry. Life is good.
Odd majors aren’t mentioning this story,,, but neither is Rush Limbaugh!
Too much information. Too much. Please kick to the FISA court. It will be like it never happened.
I am tense and nervous, and I can’t relax.
Meanwhile, mere weeks before the Republican-Ron Paul smackdown, a Minneapolis Republican by the name of Peter Schlong, or something like that, got busted for soliciting a prostitute.
Note to Al Franken: USE your comedy.
Well, the main difference between the Edwards thing and the Larry Craig story is that LARRY CRAIG PLEADED GUILTY before it became a story. There’s nothing to back up the Edwards thing but the word of a couple of panty-sniffing tabloid reporters.
Atty Gen John Edwards needs to put the vice clamp on NE and FN
well lets face it, his wife is no Mrs. Kucinich
Looking pale in a mens room is proof?
It probably was just Burrito Night at Señor Cantina’s.
Senator Edwards, I’m just about done I’ll be right out, thanks Senator Craig!
John Edwards, snort coke off a transvestite’s tit and come back to us. Your lame old hetero-sex is super booooring.
I hope the scandal involves some sort of hand-signal under a bathroom stall, otherwise this is just liberal hetero-love sex and not part of the Reps “teh Gay Agendas.”
Heterosexual relationship among of-age individuals. I feel sorry for his wife, otherwise, eh. We need the scandal standard that Edwin Edwards had. Has to be caught with a dead girl or a live boy.
Terry: Edwin did know how to make hilarity out of his philandering. As he said of David Duke, “We’ve both been caught between the sheets. It’s up to the voters to decide which sin is worse.” (I’m paraphrasing)
I wonder how he’s doing in the pokey.
i’ll probably never know the truth of that story but i like to think the
best of people. it’s always seemed odd to me though that a man who works
so hard for the poor would be farting through such expensive underwear.
as for his sex life, i’m happy to leave it to him. same goes for his family life.
he seems decent enough from my perspective. except i hate his hair, bitch!
The Independent
Amid scenes more suited to a Benny Hill sketch than the corridors of a luxury hotel, two journalists and a photographer chased Mr Edwards – whose wife Elizabeth is battling incurable cancer – around the building for several minutes.
Any scandal that can be set to Benny Hill music = awesome.
Wake up, people!!!
The story has now been confirmed by a hotel security guard. Amongst the bravest of the brave, security guards are the heroest of the heroest. Remember little Frank Wills, without whom we might never have known of Watergate? Putting his own life in jeopardy, he removed pieces of tape from a doorlock. TWICE! Brought down a President, singlehandedly.
On the downside, there is the security guard who murdered RFK, but that story never got any MSM traction either, because it wasn’t “confirmed” by a security guard. [You see how that works?]
But this story has been confirmed by a security guard, so go ahead and cue the Benny Hill music and the stentorian intonations of Brit Hume. Preferably to be run simultaneously. Because the only thing that could possibly make Brit Hume sound like a bigger idiot would be to hear him drone his drivel whilst wacky Keystone Kops bird-dance muzak tweets in the background.
I hoped I could be the first one on here to say that Ann Coulter is a foul and ugly woman. I am happy to see no one beat me to it.
Apropos of very little, Ann Coulter is a foul and ugly woman. Thank you.
Canuckledragger: What was that stump speech Edwards was prone to making, something about two America’s or was that two sets of families?
Canuckledragger: So. basically, this means Mr. Edwards is a poor tipper.
I for one, welcome our well coifed new overlord.
My new avatar in his honor
WagTehGod: Doesn’t look like the kind of man who would need to hire a prostie to get his rocks off, eh?
[Long pause.]
That said, he’s big, but not hairy — though few Asians, particularly East Asians, are — so he’s not a bear, at least. Prolly was soliciting for some Nordic minx to service him, then. So, straight.
Q2: That’s for me to know and my consort to let out of the bag.
Wagamuffin: Nice haul! I, on the other hand, have no trophies.
My Ma loves Benny Hill and she’s no Bitter. Maybe this whole mess is a good thing.
Consort? Bag? Yeah, he got laid.
HedonismBot: Ann Coulter is not a woman. A foul and disgusting swamp thing. A reanimated corpse of an anorexic teenager. Not, I repeat, NOT a woman. That’s an insult to my gender and I resent it.
wonk_the_heck: You make it sound like such a passive endeavour. I assure you, it most certainly was not.
wonk_the_heck: Laid while using a plastic bag? Sounds kind of Republican.
tunamelt: Norm Coleman’s basement apartment sex dungeon for breath play. Richard Simmons was there.
I left early.
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: Just another Saturday night, I see.
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: then i hope you enjoyed the chase.
tunamelt: when i think republican bag i get old bag, teabag and scumbag.
tunamelt: Technically, they started Friday and lasted until about six hours ago. So yes, all of Saturday night proper was encompassed, and it was rather typical. Except for the special guest star.
Funny, I already went drinking today. Twice. I’m blurry eyed, but is that suit pinstriped or seersucker? I can’t be sure I’m not seeing Larry Craig.