Wonkette
EMAIL OF THE DAY:
“from: [REDACTED]
to: tips@wonkette.com
date: Fri, Jul 25, 2008 at 2:19 PM
subject: ASSHOLETTES.COM
ASSHOLETTES. COM — NOW, DOESN’T THAT SOUND BETTER ? ADMIT IT, YOU KNOW IT FITS BETTER WITH ALL THE STUPID CRAP YOU SPEW OUT.”
LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
Read More:
2:23 PM
on Fri July 25 2008
By
Jim Newell
1622 Views
paultard? commenter from the RNC site?
Probably didn’t realize their CAPS LOCK WAS ON!!!
PoliticalGraffiti: The people who fired Doris?
Dear Redacted,
Please clean the Cheetos/Ding-Dong/Moon Pie crumbs out of your jammed CAPS key and your navel, which probably hangs over your desk like the rest of your gut, bursting forth from your sweat-stained wife-beater. kthxbi
<3
The Assholettes
itgetter:
Or Tracy from Maryland. She’s of that… “personal demographic.”
http://www.johnmccain.com/mccainnation/Request.aspx?guid=ce77b511-2d79-4d46-beee-eb03a63c2170&party=ce77b511-2d79-4d46-beee-eb03a63c2170&zip=22201&dist=100&ptype=00000000-0000-0000-0000-000000000000
It’s average Joe and Christian Brother, they’re upset we made fun of their nifty fundie slideshow.
At least he’s concise.
Doesn’t “Wonk” already mean asshole?
For once Iagree with the poster:
for all intensive purposes you loose all cridibilty when you just one-sdedely mawk John McCain. You morans spew rediculous nonsenseabout teh great american soldier John McCain while heaping praise on your muslim idle barak HUSSEIN NObama. You’re web sight makes me want to PUKE!
You know, I think assholettes.com is already taken. I used to have a membership there. As a republican, I do love the butt play. Good times…good times.
Uh-Oh. Someone’s been spending time in the bitter barn. How about a Happy Meal? It comes with a big pair of Truck Nutz and a copy of the Gay Agenda.
Isn’t this the guy with the wheelbarrow, in the McDonalds piece?
oh yeah, also YOU FAGGITS CAN ALL MOVE TO RUSSIA IF YOU DON”T LIKE THIS COUNTRY!!!!!!!!
NumbaOneHotDogEatah: Nono, you’re thinking of the yiddish word “Novak”
I thought William F. Buckley, Jr. died?
Baconcat: Why would me move to Russia because we don’t like Cindy McCain??? OHHHHH…you said c(o)unt-RY…ok…
Are you redacting because you don’t want to have a fun lawsuit like Perez Hilton? http://www.gaylesbiantimes.com/?id=12675
I would normally say you should ignore a post like that. But since they took the time to put it in all caps….
Assholettes? If anything it’s Truck Nutters™
PrairiePossum: Isn’t acquiring the rights to assholettes.com ON the gay agenda? They must still be fund raising to buy it off of that republican PAC.
That’s MISTER Assholette to you, sir!
I really want to know WHY this person is upset, which of the many many DELICIOUS posts was it?
THIS IS INDEED A SPECIAL FRIDAY, THREE WACKY GOP RETARDED POSTS IN A ROW!!!!!!!!!!!
I’ve seen this before. It’s Big Mac withdrawl. The worst part is the Tourettes-like spamming of Web sites. I’d really hate to see what Kos’s inbox is like right now.
Baconcat: Nicely done. But I think a real bitter would have misspelled “muslim.”
Otherwise, a solid three whore diamonds.
Baconcat: Russia???!!! You’re falling behind. Try to keep up. Judging by Obama’s speech yesterday the really trendy assholettes are moving to Germany.
loudmouthredhead: Win. Though I would’ve thought it was the Proto-Sumerian word, “Kristol.”
Assholette! Oooh! It’s making me all warm and tingly.
Baconcat: UCANHAZSTAR!
4tehlulz: And meanwhile, those gheys are getting all the McNuggets they can cram in their mouths!
I thought assholettes were moist towlettes you used to clean off the santorum after a fine ass reaming…
Well, he/she has a point. I say, run with it. Time for a logo change, Editors!
loudmouthredhead: Mouths?
…Assholettes? What does the “asshole let” happen or do?
Ahh…come on…if it wasn’t for asshole like us, shit like him wouldn’t get out in the world.
Ba da boom.
That’s DR. Assholette to you. Please check in for your frontal lobotomy, stat! Oh, wait.
Worst. Cheerleading Squad. Evah.
well, we know it’s not john mccain.
PrairiePossum: oh, how I wish!
As I reread this email, I’m a bit surprised by the lack of spelling errors and basically correct use of punctuation. It seems ALLCAPS is the only internet tradition this person has yet to grasp.
queeraselvis v 2.0: I think that society was also the first to use the word “Corvette” as well, which they defined as a tool to cull the slow and the weak from the peasantry.
Given how this site originally achieved its prominence, our screaming retard of an e-mailer may, in a roundabout way, have a point.
mookworthjwilson: OK, that was a laugh-out-louder. Snort.
Combover: definitely t-shirt material.
4tehlulz: Ok ok, all the McNuggets they can dip?
What, is the RNC “Ask Obama” site not taking anymore submissions?
It might help, [redacted] if, before you post, you have a fucking point.
I was really hoping that that would be a much longer letter.
If we change the name to ASSHOLETTES.COM, we could market the site as a pay-per-view for in-the-closet male Republicans. I’m sure we’d generate alot of cash.
mookworthjwilson: It’s after you get DeLay-ed that you have to sanitize your Santorum. Geez!
loudmouthredhead: where does troyking come in, so to speak?
And I wonder what posting it was that finally drove this person over the edge enough to email?
REVEREND Dr. Assholette, if you’re nasty.
And I like my trucknutzzz chockful of (or covered in) “special sauce.”
And by “special sauce” I mean the baby-batter of baby-faced repuglican interns. And McDonalds-eating fegallim.
Actually, I like it.
I wish there was a double caps-lock, or an uber caps-lock or something.
columnv: BOLD?
“WITH ALL THE STUPID CRAP YOU SPEW OUT.””
…and we’re not done yet, little Paultard.
assholette really did have a nice ring to it…
But, but, I’M A MAN, BABY!!
I’m cool with asshole, nothing new. But the “ette” is making me feel funny in my pants…
Initiation rite for Late Night Shots?
Shit, the angry, all-cap letters are boring me. The snarky, fish-in-a-barrel responses have been equally underwhelming.
(Dieter Voice) Your story has grown tiresome.
can someone please link the “Gigolette” video? I think it’s by Tina Marie.
It is weird. I have been really, really pissed whilst on the Internet
off and on since 1994 and never did I ever use all CAPS.
I have to say in the pantheon of poison-keyboard caps-fests that this site gets, this only rates a “Meh”
It is like this one’s heart isn’t in it anymore. Flaccid.
There used to be standards, that’s all I’m saying.
End of an era. Sniff. Sigh.
Well, that just goes to show how one brave Republican commenter, using simple straightforward language, can halt an entire, evil website in it’s tracks. (Sigh) Now that Wonkette is finished, I wonder what I’ll look for on my computer tomorrow?
brave republican….is that kinda like kohsher ham????
AfghanVet: Sweet!
PrairiePossum: But could they cough up enough money for the site? After all, the South Carolina vacations, with gas prices so high, must take a big chunk out of their paychecks. And the price tags for trips to Minneapolis airport must be terribly difficult to swallow.
On the other hand, erotic stories about Barack’s workout sessions are available free.