Wonkette
Already known as the worst, meanest driver in Washington, this morning Robert Novak was caught by witnesses driving into a pedestrian and speeding away from the crime scene. Novak was racing down 18th Street through the K St. NW intersection when he hit a much younger man, a 66 year old who was using the crosswalk and had a green walk signal.
The man flew over the hood and over the windshield of Novak’s black Corvette before rolling off to the street. Novak sped away, but was chased by a lawyer on a bicycle.
[David] Bono said the pedestrian, who was crossing the street on a “Walk” signal and was in the crosswalk, rolled off the windshield and then Novak made a right into the service lane of K Street. “The car is speeding away. What’s going through my mind is, you just can’t hit a pedestrian and drive away,” Bono said.
The assault was also witnessed by “a WJLA-TV crew and reporter,” according to the Politico.
The cops got him and threw him in jail forever. Ha ha, not really. They gave him a ticket for “failing to yield” and let him go. The unidentified 66-year-old victim is in the hospital.
Novak once told the Washington Post that he hated “jaywalkers” and wanted to run them all over.
Breaking: Novak cited after hitting pedestrian [Politico]
Novak said he was set up on that McCain VP rumor. He didn’t know the half of it.
Jinx on you and Sara Smith. And, HA HA, this is a plaintiff lawyer’s dream.
I love this:
“‘I didn’t know I hit him. I feel terrible,’ a shaken Novak told reporters from Politico and WJLA as he was returning to his car.”
He didn’t know he hit him? The dude rolled over the windshield. Is Novak blind?
As a self-described “compassionate conservative,” he had to drive away, because there is no such thing as a “compassionate conservative.”
I didn’t hit “somebody”, it was just another peasant…geez…wait…thats a crime?
So much for a Corvette being a “cool” car.
He can barely sit up straight and he drives a corvette. I sort of pictured a large, older model buick.
Wherever evil lurks, wherever darkness strolls, wherever malice rolls in a late-model Corvette, Bono will be there.
“’Learn to read the signs, [bodily orifice]!’”
Nostril?
Doglessliberal: Can you PROVE he didn’t see it? No, no you can’t!!! And don’t be surprised when Novak sues the pedestrian for damage to his ‘vette.
Doglessliberal: Blind and deaf and mentally retarded? I mean, I’m fully aware of the sound that is made when I run over a paper cup. A person’s body colliding with my car would most certainly not go unnoticed.
Novak will skate as a result of Bush’s mass pardon.
What, no ‘leaving the scene of an accident’? Wusses.RuperttheBear: Yes, only the Vice President can assault elderly lawyers and get away unscathed.
as usual, politio’s focus is all wrong.
instead of focusing on the silly, european type girly-man on a bike who had
no business on the street in the first place and could have really
hurt someone by chasing poor novak, they’re slanting their coverage
to make novak, who was only driving on the street for god’s sake, look
like he was in the wrong. sheesh.
right now, novak is in the “victim’s” room reading him a selection of
his best columns.
Combover: “Learn to read the signs, TOENAIL!!” It was me. I do resemble a toe-nail. He was merely being observant.
Novak was clearly being used by the McCain campaign to distract attention from the Obama European tour. And he is REALLY going ALL OUT.
Insensitive prick. The least he could have done is grab a 9-iron and finish the guy off.
Your…just…like…crosstown traffic.
Novak got a $50 ticket for running into a pedestrian? Well, that’ll teach him a lesson.
Did they give him a ticket for “Sabotaging the CIA” too?
Um, I’d hit it.(?)
tsunami: It was Bono of U2. Oh, David Bono. Never mind.
What a pussy. We’re supposed to be impressed because you can hit some nobody with your car and not get arrested?
Call me when you can shoot a rich guy in the face, and then get him to apologize on national TV for all the trouble he caused you. Now that’s a real badass.
Wednesday Bloody Wednesday.
Was the pedestrian a CIA agent?
@Ken Layne:
TOTAL WIN FOR PRINCE OF DARKNESS TAG. My hard working co-workers and I are laughing very hard workinglike.
RuperttheBear: Ha ha, Jim Newell is hard at work on this identical post as well.
Braking is for the elite.
blowhard: You’re not playing the game right. It has to be an orifice. ‘Can’t you read the signs, ear piercing!?!!??’ I don’t think this is coming together.
Sara K. Smith: Great minds think alike. Or small minds seldom differ, whichevs.
dcgrrl: Actually, I’ve been thinking it over, and I think this is like one of those gangster movies where they all start taking each other out towards the end. Next, we’ll see Condi caught in some sort of prostitution scam, David Addington will be informed on and arrested for money laundering, Bob Gates will wake up with a horse’s head in his bed …
Nothing will touch Cheney until the final, ambiguous, scene, though.
This made me almost as gleeful as the news that Dick Cheney shot an old man in the face. Why do the Republicans hate old people so much, and is this why they hate their own presidential nominee? Watch out John McCain!!!
Forget the citation and hit-and-run violations. Bobbie boy was “shaken” because he can forsee the CIVIL suit that is going to take that black ‘Vette of his and give it to the victim, who just happens to be a lawyer. To quote Flounder — This is soooo great.
A Corvette? What’s he compensating for?
And then Novak and droogie Chip Pickering went off to the milk bar to celebrate another spree of ultraviolence.
As someone who knows a few of his relatives, I can say he’s not really “liked” in the fam. “Liked” at all, actually.
Well, if the evil conservative douche “journalist” gig doesn’t work out, he’s now qualified to work for FEMA.
can we finally beat Novak to death with his own cane? i mean, come on, it’s so overdue.
4tehlulz: Yea, but Novak refuses to recognize him as such.
Was the pedestrian a D or an R?
Christastic: you know, you might be right. he surely can find a lawyer in this town to rep him in that case.
Boy, when Bob Novak throws somebody under the bus, he really throws somebody under the bus! Wokka, etc. I envision that when Cheney is no longer Veep, they will have some sort of “Most Dangerous Game” weekend on an island somewhere off the cost of Kennebunkport, where they sight in their guns on the elderly.
Aurelio: yeah, he’d probably have offered more as a bribe to make it go away.
Novak’s Corvette was chased down by a bicycle?
Oil prices may not be why Detroit is losing money.
Mahousu: I was thinking he might be on the payroll of oil companies and hired to take out people who bike to work.
shortsshortsshorts: Then I insist you check out the ALT tag on the photo..a doozy, and I’m not even trying to not laugh…Jesus…
Is everyone sure Novak was driving? I would have assumed he’d have backed over a victim. You know, just to be sure.
Okay, now for the mental image of the day: Sorry, King of Douchebaggery, no more road head for you if you can’t look out for
pedestrians.
The cops should dust his windshield for faceprints.
Has Novak leaked the name of the pedestrian yet? Does it rhyme with flame?
this closet homo needs to spend some time in the joint.
edgydrifter: From the article: “[Bono] said he chased Novak half a block down K Street, finally caught up with him and then put his bike in front of the car to block it and called 911. Traffic immediately backed up, horns blaring, until commuters behind Novak backed up so he could pull over.” Bono has more balls than I do. Or maybe he didn’t know he was dealing with the devil himself.
freakishlystrong: YES. AWESOME.
Shouldn’t car accident stories be about Lindsay Lohan or something? DC really is Hollywood for ugly people.
Given a ticket? That’s all? In Washington State that is a felony hit and run injury accident case. He puts a guy in the hospital and just gets a ticket. Any other regular Joe would have gone to jail.
KeithinWash: Not if that regular Joe was wearing diapers.
Someone needs to tell Robert Novak not to mistake Jimi Hendrix lyrics for driving instructions:
You jump in front of my car when you,
You know all the time that
Ninty miles an hour, girl, is the speed I drive
You tell me its alright, you dont mind a little pain
You say you just want me to take you for a ride
KeithinWash: We are dealing with DC, where assualt within an AK-47 amounts to violation of the noise ordinance.
It would figure Novak drives a Corvette: Not one of the great ones like the Stingray from the 60’s, but a wholly ineffectual, overly-designed, useless piece of Detroit shit that can’t hold a candle to any real sportscars today.
Novak was driving an AMERICAN car.
Bono was probably riding a French bicycle.
Who are you gonna believe, a cheese eating surrender monkey,
or one of Tom DeLays close personal AMERICAN friends?
Damn jaywalker.
[/sarcasm]
Combover: It was “cunt.” He was pandering to McCain at the time.
At least it was a corvette, ideally shaped to scoop up and discard a pedestrian a few feet in either direction. (I actually had this happen to me once.) Had he been behind the wheel of an SUV… thunk, squish.squish.
What’s the difference between a porcupine and a Corvette?
With a Corvette, the prick is on the inside.. tada!
S.Luggo: maybe in your DC, but I have seen people ticketed for jaywalking and littering here, they boot cars for being parked too close to a corner, and be sure not to get towed for parking in a street-sweeping zone during the wrong hours because you might never see your car again. Hitting a liberal traitor who hates America because he rides his bike and does not burn gas is, however, A-OK if you are an Evil Repubican Gnome.
I had always wondered what kind of people bought corvettes
Upon regaining consciousness, the victim was reported to have said, “Now where is that marvelous ape?”
ReelectTilden: DC really is Hollywood for ugly people… ha!
KeithinWash: You forget that that is the OTHER Washington. And anyway, in Seattle we have the famous rabbi who hit several bicyclists but never had his license taken away until he finaly smashed into and killed a pedestrian.
The police out here, I tell ya. Well, and there.
Shit, when I got a dui, I paid $1,000 and got six months suspended and I didn’t hurt anyone.
I read this first line as “Already known as the worst, meanest coach in wherever the hell he is now” after I saw the picture of Larry Brown you have posted.
What’s all this twaddle about some Novak guy, again?
Hey look, this tired shriveled-up prick of a homo (sapiens, that is), is another ass-wipe taking up space. It won’t be long until…..WAIT, HE HAS CANCER OF THE BRAIN!! There is a God! Well, the surgery will obviously be microscopic. Hope his surgeon is a right wing nutcase who graduated from a South American “medical school”. Please God, let him die bfore he can vote for McNutt! Please, oh please. I promise I won’t mention Laura Bush killing her boyfriend, again!