Wonkette
PHIL GRAMM: POOR PEOPLE SUCK! “There wasn’t ever a bit of evidence for such an absurd claim, but it didn’t matter. If you repeat a lie often enough, in front of an American Flag, it becomes true for people too dim to know better. After all, it was Patriotic, and only communists and homosexuals would be against Patriotism.” [AOL Political Machine]
NATION OF WHINERS
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I disagree with this article. I don’t think someone close to possibly the future president would ever say something remotely close to that quote. Why would anyone jeopardize their career and their credibility with a statement like that?
Gramm, cracker.
All I know is that real men don’t eat quiche. That is literally all I know.
Judy Kim: Are you lost or something?
I am Gramm.
Gramm I am.
I do not like poor folks, god damn.
No, everybody’s got Phil Gramm wrong. He said we’re a nation of winers. As in winers and diners. Because every American he happens to meet wants to buy him dinner and lots of wine. And send a hooker up to his hotel room. So we must be doing just grrrreeeat!
SayItWithWookies: A question about terminology. I’ve been called a wino, which I understand is because I buy and consume too much wine in a selfish manner. Am I to understand that a winer is a selfless individual who buys wine for someone else? Because that just sounds dumb. WAKE UP YOU WINERS! Start drinking for yourself! Things are much better that way.
Notnotlickingtoads: shhh. if you ignore her, she might just wander back out…
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: Phil Gramm doesn’t understand why so many good Americans want to wine and dine him. Maybe it’s because of his patriotic effort to cut taxes for the rich, or to eviscerate publicly-financed healthcare. Regardless, they do. And over dinner they often have frank and opend discussions about subjects that good Americans are in favor of — for instance, decreased regulations of hedge funds, or the elimination of open bidding on government contracts. The kinda stuff we all like to talk about over a beer.
Phil Gramm’s not going to question the motivation of such good Americans. He simply cherishes this type of interaction with his constituents. And those whiny motherfuckers who think otherwise can go fuck themselves.
Dixie Chicks have a new tune, “We’re proud to be the Cool Whiners’ Daughters.”
irisheyes: But what if her Nigerian uncle needs help transferring a large amount of money out of the country? I think she should stay. Just in case.
SayItWithWookies: I hear the naira is making gains against the dollar these days, so I concur.
So amusing, the responses on AOL. We are a polarized country, and don’t so much argue as talk past each other. Gramm’s the same total shitheel who… (I just erased a couple hundred words of rantage nobody needs to read)… the big question here is, what is there about Phil Gramm that’s FUNNY? I’m kinda at a loss here. There’s the “on steroids” formula (like the “in bed” formula of days gone by): one could say, Phil, Gramm is like Elmer Fudd ON STEROIDS. Boffo? No? No. Still not funny. No, no fart jokes either. Help me please, I’m dying here.
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: Hell, the ngultrum is making headway against the dollar these days. Maybe we should invest in yetis.
There sure are a lot of dumb people at the AOL site.
S. Cullen Bonz: Plus marshmellows and chocolate, gimme some smores!
It’s simple — he cribbed from South Park. Poor people smell like sour milk. But when they kill them, they are “you bastards!”.
Something to do with the Discardedstution. Unclear about that last, but South Park is usually right. Come back, Chef!
Wiener.
Nation.Of.Wieners.
Jeez!
Ken, oh Ken!! The last time you expounded on the downward spiral of Americans’ fortunes, you sent Tits_LaRue heading for her lead-lined bunker and we haven’t heard from her since! A few others confessed depression and are, alas, no longer snarking with us.
Hwaet! Are we become a Nation of Layners???
WonkaBee: I hope our Missing Friends are just having a summer vacation like Rich Elitist Liberals sometimes enjoy, in Afghanistan.
contentsunderpressure:
Oh, I’d love to be a Wonkeratti wiener,
That is what I’d truly love to be-ee-ee
Cuz if I were a Wonkeratti wiener
Bilderburgers would be afraid of me.
Winner! [sp?]
Okay, so I realize that usually we only comment on those stories fed us by our most glorious and illustrious editorial team. But it’s late on a Sunday, I can’t sleep, so I just wandered over to http://www.hcsfjm.nutjob, and they’ve posted a pretty critical ad of the Annointed Hopey One. Apparently he’s being funded by TERRORISTS! Hello? TERRORISTS! And, once he’s elected, they’re gonna come over here and kill all the starving Ethiopian babies we’ve got. I’m just sayin’
irisheyes: Shhhhh! You want to give away the whole Plan??
irisheyes: While I generally tend to believe everything from the .nutjob domain since it is free of evil corporate influences like American Apparel, I can’t really get all worked up about this since the Africans are always killing each other anyway, so why should I care that Kenyan Muslim Obama has it out for the Ethiopian Jews? I mean, when has this ever surprised us?
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: oh you. I guess I really just needed someone to come along and put it in perspective for me like that. Thanks; I thought I had a night of underground bunker building ahead of me, but perhaps I’ll just go to bed.
irisheyes: Be sure to smoke some hookah first. It’ll put a protective terrorist charm around your house.
Is it possible that he’s referring to the Michael Weiner Savage Nation? My autism is preventing me from discerning this.
Ya but the rest of the Republicans are SOOOOOOO GREAT to the impoverished bitters, that we should give them prizes. You know, like huge contracts and stuff.
Now you whiners are whining about being accused of being whiners. That’s the epitome of whinery.
Aurelio:
The penultimate epitome is Aurelio whining about whiners who are whining about being accused of being whiners, whilst Wookies and .WEzl wittily whine about “wine” being wrongfully written as “whine,” and therefore wolfable as water or whiskey if you will, and not so wantonly wicked as “whine.”
Darehead: Why, oh why, oh why?
Well, you’ve gotta admit, they are kinda stinky sometimes (poor people).
I like it: “Whiner Nation”. Kinda like “Zombie Nation”, except not. “Whiner Zombie Nation”. Nahhh.
Aurelio: I LOVE the Epitomeov Winery! I toured it once, and they let you stomp the grapes and everything! Try their Merlot, available everywhere!
Gramm’s a funny name for a Chinaman.
“There are those who look at things the way they are, and whine… I dream of things far-fetched that never were, and whine not.”
–Phil Gramm (channeling RFK)
I like the larger picture here, if you say something over and over again, (the flag being a nice touch), idiots believe it’s true, how else to explain the last horrible 7.5 years, read those assinine AOL posters, they STILL believe these evildoers…
And I’m a wino,(wina if female?), as well, though, nowadays I get my wine from a box…
Judy Kim: You’re cuter than a basket of kittens. Seriously.
We’re now several generations into a belief that we can get anything we want, exactly when we want it, that sacrifice is for losers, and that sensitivity is elevated over truth. We’ve become drunk on the spoils and world image won by the blood and sweat of previous generations, wasted away our inheritance, and demand that somebody remedy the situation.
We ARE a nation of whiners. Unfortunately, the loudest whiners have no real problems, just inconveniences. The people that do have legitimate grievances usually suffer in silence.
NotNotLickingToads: I am hoping so. Or that I missed her sarcasm. After all, we here at Wonkette believe that America is great BECAUSE people who aspire to be president say remarkably stupid things on a regular basis.
NotNotLickingToads: I disagree with your comment. Someone who would make a comment would never make that comment.
NotUrEvryDayWEzl: I didn’t realize Obama had it in for the Ethiopian Jews. When I worked in Israel, the Ethiopian Jews were essentially imported for use as slave labor (at least those I worked with every day) and it would be hard indeed on our friends in that nation if they were to lose that essential part of their economy. Clearly, Obama must be stopped!
Servo:
In my experience, the folks with legit grievances whine too, but nobody listens.
On the teevee last night Denise Richards whined about how she’s constantly orbited by tabloid photographers.
Judy Kim: I for one appreciate your dry sense of humor.
“We’re the only nation in the world where all our poor people are fat.” — Gramm, 9/6/81