Wonkette
Chip Pickering, the Mississippi Congressman who’s retiring to spend more time with his divorced family and mistresses, participated in last night’s annual Roll Call Congressional Baseball Game one last time, for the fans. If you would like a recap of last night’s game that cannot go three words without divining about what it portends for the election, we recommend The New Republic. We’re more interested, however, in an alleged incident that an eyewitness tells us about, involving our friend Chip: that he let go of his aluminum bat during a practice swing in the on-deck circle, letting it soar into the crowd and destroy some man’s face.
Here’s the report:
An interesting tidbit from the Congressional Baseball game tonight. Sometime in the 2nd or 3rd inning, Chip Pickering is the on-deck batter taking practice swings. During one of his swings, the bat flies out of his hands (an almost impossible feat when one is using metal bats). The bat flies into the 4th or 5th row of the crowd and hits a man right on the head. The man stands up initially in a daze, and then realizes that blood is pouring out of his head and all over the people beside him. A doctor, who was in the crowd, immediately rushes to help him. My vision of the next few minutes was impeded. However, I am fairly certain the paramedics came and laid him on the ground. The next I saw, the man, with the head completely bandaged was led, with help, away from the scene and, presumably, into an ambulance. The man looked terrible. He already had two black eyes and his face was yellow.
Interestingly enough, Chip Pickering, after glancing into the crowd for several seconds, proceeded to play the rest of the game. He was celebrating after he hit a home run and at the end of the game. Smiling and joking with everyone else. Not for one second, did he make one move to help or see what he could do after he had clearly injured a spectator. The entire incident was deplorable.
It’s pretty bad even for a CONGRESSMAN to have a new scandal start and be covered-up during a freaking worthless charity baseball game. If anyone knows anymore about this, please send us TIPS to tips@wonkette.com.
On the bright side, he’s still not as big a dick as Barry Bonds.
OK, maybe it’s pretty close.
Well, at least he wasn’t quail hunting….
Years of selective douche inbreeding have finally produced the pure, Platonic form of douchebag.
i think he’s related to mitt romney.
the somewhat less well off side of the family.
The linked TNR article is actually pretty good, and features this whiny comment from an obvious Euro-socialist surrender weenie:
Why is it that all of a sudden half the blog posts on TNR have to be about either sports or sports metaphors? This post is incomprehensible to me.
And TNR clearly does not care much about its female readers.
After a few years, the batee (one who is hit by a bator) may own Mississippi.
Look at the beady fuckin’ eyes on that velocaraptor!
He must be stopped before he kills again
Rather symbolic. Chip can’t control his little bat either.
At least “Chip” didn’t knock out his wife with a slap shot and continue playing like a certain Wayne Gretzky did. But that’s not saying much.
thats not true, i saw him run up into the stands to see the guy. The paramedics were there though and he went back to the game.
Ahhhh… Republican governance, writ small.
This douche sack probably also grew up on squirrel a la popcorn popper.
He was probably also the fat drunk guy at the Ron Paul rally besmirching our image.
He looks like a human pork chop.
I went to this shitshow a few years ago on a Team Wonkette field trip and would have frankly been grateful for a bat to the face. It would have broken up the tedium, and the blow to the head might have caused some short-term amnesia that would have erased the memories of Rick Santorum in tight baseball pants that still haunt me.
ManchuCandidate: I think Chip has had plenty of experience with unconscious women.
What’s baseball?
lumpenprole: Isn’t that what the Europeans call sucker?
Pickering…yes, of the meridian douchbag-pickering clan.
they became quite rich via the family’s famous “darkie candles,”
which were rendered from the not quite dead, but otherwise useless
bodies of aged slaves.
by the time they went out of the candle business in 1947, the family
controlled a huge share of the future toxic waste dumps of mississippi.
their annual debutante balls were the social event of the season
until the unfortunate incident involving his younger sister, magnolia
and the goat.
i mean…offa that picture, it COULD be true.
this dude was in the Borat movie
Haha. Just kidding. I was pretending to be younger than 70.
Now THAT’s pulling yourself up by your own boot straps. I’m glad Chip advocates it. I may ACCIDENTALLY hit him with my car and drive away though.
I know the whole Paultard March on Washington was a great and important moment in Wonkette history, but would it have been completely impossible for you guys to sneak someone into this congressional baseball game? Do they give away tickets or is it given the full Dick Cheney security treatment?
JamesMichaelCurley: If he does wind up owning Mississippi he will wish Chip had killed him.
roundofapplause: Since you left out the part where he proceeded to kick the old man with his steel-toed boots (why he would wear those during a baseball game, I don’t know), I assume you’re an unpaid staffer for Pickering.
Did he get his bat back at least?
Is it just me or does the name Chip just naturally equal douche?
baseball been berry good to Chip.
The little Chippy better be careful, people are allowed to carry guns in DC now.
jagorev: I’d make a bad ‘Chip shot’ joke here, but unlike TNR, I care a great deal about my female readers.
Chip is a healthy young psychopath.
jagorev: Yeah, he ran up into the stands. But only so he could prison-rape the victim while he was down and bloody. Upon completion, he was immediately nominated for Chairman of the RNC…probably.
I’m sure Chip at least checked to see if the man was a contributor. I mean, C’MON PEOPLE, he’s gotta set a GOP example of having those in office not care about those who aren’t at least “Aces” level, right?
Not_So_Much: Rape and assault are fine if you’re a southern Republican and you’re doing it in the name of exorcising demons (cf: Bobby Jindal).
loudmouthredhead: “Aces” level? I think you mean “Four Whore Diamond” level.
Where is that marvelous ape?
At least he came equipped with a hair helmet.
Honestly, if you’re such a slap dick that you lose grip of the bat in the on-deck circle, YET are superior enough athletically to hit an inside-the-park home run … then Congress should enter its team in the Special Olympics.
Hey, people, all Major League Baseball tickets clearly state that “bats and balls may enter the stands at high speed,” and that patrons should watch out for that. Says it in 5-point type, on the back. If people can’t be bothered to read and memorize that warning, and apply it to half-assed charity games, then Chip can’t very well be expected to care about them. He’s all about personal responsibility.
OK, here’s the real story, since I was sitting in the seat directly behind the guy:
Bottom of the 5th, Pickering is on deck, bat slips out of his hands and hits a guy in the third row. I lean over and ask if he is okay, he says yes and doesn’t realize he is hurt (shock) but blood starts dripping down his head. He tries to stand up, dazed, but I make him sit down and grab a blanket from the row in front of us, holding it to his head to help staunch the bleeding until help can arrive.
Pickering stands right by the entrance to the stands looking on but attending physician arrives along with other medical personnel. Pickering is not a doctor and rightly steps back, as do I who am only trained in first aid. Pickering stands watching and only once he sees the fan is being taken care of does he go back the game. Paramedics lay the guy down, ask him if he can hear and see okay and guy responds in the affirmative. He didn’t get blood anywhere but on me, but that was because I was holding the blanket to his head.
Paramedics wrap his head in bandages. Bruising is definitely already forming but doesn’t look like anything is broken. He walks up the steps and out to an awaiting ambulance with the help of one of the paramedics, if a little wobbly.
I’m not sure why this is scandalous–it was an accident and fans should know they can be hurt, especially sitting so close to the field. This was clearly not his fault. Only sad thing is the guy who got hurt had never been to a baseball game before–I gave him a rundown of the basics during the first inning. Hope he isn’t scared off baseball for life.
Ah, but there’s no joy in Mudville,
Mighty Chipper has fucked up.
In response to Cinderella’s note:
I was at the game as well and was sitting several rows behind and to the side of where the man was hit. I don’t remember exactly when the incident occurred, but I do remember it was in the middle of the game. I think the outrage, at least from the section where I was sitting, was that Pickering could so quickly go back to playing the game after he may have just seriously injured someone. Whether or not the man looked like he might be ok, I think most people would stop what they were doing to ensure they were doing anything they could do. I don’t care if he’s a doctor or not. While Pickering may have seemed a little upset in the couple minutes following the incident, he had a responsibility to come over and do everything he can to help. He could have talked to the people sitting around the man. Find out who he was and where he was being taken to. It seemed utterly callous and inappropriate for him to get right back to the game when he realized the man wasn’t dead. Not only that, but the image of him laughing and enjoying himself made that point even clearer It was clear where his priorities were. I agree that I don’t think this is a scandal. It’s just actions that are in very poor taste for anyone, especially a public figure. The original report had some details about the innings wrong and was blocked from much of what happened after the man was hit, but I don’t read anything \ that was incorrect. Pickering stood there and did nothing after hurting someone accidentally. He continued to played the game and appeared to have a great time. His reputation as an asshole is reenforced. case closed.
And seriously, whoever argues that it is somehow the responsibility of the spectator to expect things to be flying through the air if they attend a baseball game clearly did not understand the situation. Pickering was in the On Deck Circle, meaning that the spectator would be focusing on the the pitcher and the batter. That point would be valid if the person batting lost control of his bat or hit a ball into the stands. However, the spectator was watching the game, and should not be responsible for a flying bat coming from an individual who isn’t technically in the game at that point. In 20 years. of playing competitive baseball, I have never seen a person lose control of the bat (especially a metal bat which has a rubber grip) while on deck. Whether or not the spectator understood the game or not, it was not his responsibility to protect himself from flying bats from anywhere but the batter.