Wonkette
You’ve been waiting for it all day, and here it is: your “Tuesday Fun Link.” Today’s link directs you to “Boycott McDonald’s,” an effort from some terrible thing called the American Family Association. Naturally, these people are not boycotting McDonald’s because they are starting diets — on the contrary, we assume they are all fat fucks who continue to patronize the likes of Wendy’s, Burger King, and “Sonic” on a daily basis. They are boycotting McDonald’s because of this: “It is about McDonald’s, as a corporation, refusing to remain neutral in the culture wars. McDonald’s has chosen not to remain neutral but to give the full weight of their corporation to promoting the homosexual agenda, including homosexual marriage.” And GUESS WHAT? This website has a comments section!!
Here are some of the best (this was NOT an easy culling process):
- “Sorry but my morals outweigh my appetite. It is so sad I can’t enjoy this eatery anymore. Please consider the MORALS and FAITH of what made this country great.”
- “McDonalds - as long as you are supporting the gay agenda my family of 5 will eat somewhere else.”
- “I am VERY disappointed that McDonalds has decided to openly support gay activists and so called “gay marriage”. Our family has been regular customers of McD for 30 years, but we are no longer. When we travel this summer we will be looking elsewhere for food -there are many alternatives.True Christians don’t hate Gays, they only desire to have them acknowledge their sinful lifestyle and and accept Jesus’ forgiveness! We are ALL sinners in need of Jesus’ foregiveness.”
- “When I travel I look for a McDonalds for breakfast now I’ll go to Bojangles”
- “I am 73, my wife is 70 - As much as we have enoyed the golden archers over the years, we will not continue to do so because of your close minded leadership.”
- “My wife, my six children, and I will not be supporting McDonald’s. I do not agree with McDonald’s, as a company, using their financial resources to promote a political issue instead of making fast food. If McDonald’s has money to give… then give more to charity…or help fight the spread of AIDS in Africa, etc., use McDonald’s resources to make a positive impact. I sure am going to miss the Southwest Salad, I was addicted.” [Notice that they all have at least six children -- Ed.]
- “It’s a sad thing when a company like McDonal’s cares more about supporting the gay life stle than Christian families. Well, they won’t get any more business from our family! From here to shining sea we won’t eat at another McDonalds!”
- “McDonald’s, You are suppose to be a family restaurant. I believe that it is inappropriate for you to speak for or against gay issues. Ronald should be neutral.”
- “Please read Genesis 19* God destroys Sodom and Gomorrah* Godly moral values has nothing to do with hate. This is about TRUTH. “The TRUTH will set you free”. GUARANTEED! Then please read 1st Timothy 1:9-11.”
- “I refuse to set foot in a McDonalds till they change their ways,my 7 grandkids said “we are going to Burger King “”
- McD’s, My family in which I grew up (yes, all 9 of us) loved your restaurant. In High School after the big game I couldn’t wait to get to McD’s. My family of 9, my wife and 7 children, will no longer go to your restaurant after your blatant disregard for what God says in His Word against the sinful lifestyle that you are choosing to promote. If you will reconsider, we may also. As for now, say goodbye to our business. Mike”
- “Gay rights? Gives a whole new meaning to “Happy Meal” doesn’t it? Now not only is McDonalds food bad for your health but it is bad for your morals too!!!! We won’t eat there again unless they change their policy.”
- “Have you read the bible? No more McDonald’s for me ever.”
- “I am informing all my children an gran children to Boycott Mcdonalds, that is a total of 22 people”
- “I wanted to leave a comment, but there is no way to type a comment in.”
[Boycott McDonalds]
Comments [Boycott McDonald's]
People: Time to Attack.
You apologize to Sonic, Jim Newell. You apologize right now.
But we all knew Ronald McDonald was gay, right?
I hate McDonalds but I’m going to buy some McNuggets tonight. Maybe the dog will eat them.
You can’t get your dick sucked at Bojangles.
Oh, wait. You can. nevermind.
Ronald should be neutral.
Run, Ronald, run!
Boy, oh, boy, wouldn’t a Big Mac go down well right about now. With a big side of those disgustingly phallic french fries.
So are they renaming the Fun Meal to the Gay Meal? And what is with all the kids these McDonald eaters are having. Just what is in that special sauce anyway?
Oh come on. Ronald McDonald wears makeup for fuck’s sake. We’ve always known he pitched for the pink team.
Stupid fundies. Wait till they find out that Burger King was originally called Bugger King, Wendy’s was actually born as Willie, and you don’t want to know what Sonic uses in their “milkshakes.”
So this is why my ass hurts after a Big Mac. If someone has the time to do it, please fax me a copy of the gay agenda. They forgot to put mine in the bag with the food. Thanks!
You know when someone references “America the Beautiful” in an inane comment on a Jesus site that they are a True Patriot.
The Soviets are putting Gay into our Water!!!!
What a sad bunch of closeted, obese homos.
I just hate when people and institutions are so “close minded” as to be open and accepting of all its customers’ lifestyles.
Godless Liberal *: Sonic is like this fantasy to me because they play the commercials all the time in LA but I have never seen one. It’s mental torture.
I blame the gays for this.
If you scroll all the way down to the bottom of the comments, you’ll see at least one person who listed their e-mail address…
A corporation should promote solid Chris-chun values, like wearing makeup and enticing children to come play in your “play place” and to taste your meat.
You know: good-ol altar boy-lovin’, toe-tappin’, homo-beatin’ GOP values.
Here in California, the state gummint is poised to become the first in the nation to ban restaurants and other food facilities from using trans fats. But the question is, will this hurt the McDonalds boycott and will trans fatties and femmes such as the American Family Association (and other culture war heroes) also be banned? Oh no!!
My favorite comment: “YUCK !…I’ve eaten my last BIG MAC !…….”
Yuck? Not because it’s a Big Mac … but why? They pound the meat with gay dicks? Huh?
So, according to one comment, the Bible doesn’t want people to eat at McDonald’s? Well, I actually agree with that…
“Ronald should be neutral.”
Ronald McDonald is quite clearly an assclown.
medievalist:
Of course Ronald is gay… just watch a video for him playing “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road” if you harbor any doubts.
well, looks like im going to McDonald’s for Lunch this entire week. If I can just piss off one Christian, than I did my part for the day.
VIVA RONALD-LUTION!!!!
WON’T SOMEBODY THINK OF THE CHILDREN?!
Mock not Sonic’s! Burgers, fries and Route 44 strawberry slushies all served by jailbait on roller skates with short shorts! You can’t get more American than that!
Oh, and if it’s a “culture war,” does that mean I get to shoot them?
Oh well, they’ll always have Cracker Barrel.
Well, if they’re not going to McDonald’s, they should go eat some Dick’s http://www.ddir.com/
tunamelt: The bastards do it in DC too…nearest Sonic to me is 60 miles…
Mainly because I can’t be bothered reading about it, how exactly is McDonald’s supporting the gay agenda anyway? Free fries with every gay marriage promotion or something?
“In High School after the big game I couldn’t wait to get to McD’s.”
Dude, if a trip to McDonald’s is the highlight of your day, it’s time to kill yourself.
You’re leaving the archers for the Jeebus. But you’ll be back for the grease, gluttons.
Worst. Political. Activism. Web. Site. Ever.
“Well, they won’t get any more business from our family! From here to shining sea we won’t eat at another McDonalds!”
This is gold, pure and simple.
When I was 4, Ronald touched me in my special area.
Meh, not to worry, they’ll all be dead tomorrow from a collective
coronary~and we’ll all still be gay!
tunamelt: It’s the same way in NYC. But don’t worry, I tried it in the midwest and like all fast-food chains, it tastes like burnt tree bark.
Peter, didn’t I see you eating a big mac?
-no!
Really? It looked like a big mac…
-It was from burger king.
You had a mcdonald’s wrapper in your hand
-It wasn’t me.
Canmon (the Inadequate): Pretty much.
Delicious: At least your area was special … my was touched so much it was just an “area.”
medievalist:
Actually, look closer. He’s a woman…or a transgender.
I chuckle when people call McDonald’s a restaurant.
Wait until they find out that Burger King is Muslim and Wendy is a lesbian.
sp/: mine
Whiskeybaby: Amen. This would seem to be a more effective threat if anyone knew where “here” is.
tunamelt: Sort of like me and In N Out, only with a less sexy name. I see commercials for them all the time, but I have never seen one in my whole life. All I hear is the tales of those brave pioneers who returned from out west, and how wonderful it is, and it makes me all the sadder.
Did anyone try to leave a comment? That site is like a comment-eating jungle.
Delicious: Did he leave a grease spot? (Sorry, I had to)
Uncle Al: Exactly. Note how they said “big” game, not just practice, or games. Nono, this was an event, something to buy a corsage for.
Whiskeybaby: It really is…If we showed that person the “other” sea, would their head explode? Let’s find out.
This wouldn’t be so bad if these idiots could at least admit that they are homophobic sacks of shit, instead of the old “we hate the act” “it’s a sin” “repent” garbage.
Here’s a link to the Bojangles website, which btw features gospel music: http://www.bojangles.com/promotions_music.html
“Ronald should be neutral.”
I always thought he should be neutered but whatever.
These people need to take the money they save not eating at McD’s and spend it on condoms.
Guppy06: Oh, and if it’s a “culture war,” does that mean I get to shoot them?
Naw, it’s not one of those good wars.
Just like when my granduncle went to jail for shooting at the homeless back in 1965. Stupid misnamed War on Poverty.
teh_heysoos: So you’re saying we should pay some attention to kfstarnes@sbcglobal.net, “concerned mom”?
WHEN AD CAMPAIGNS GO WRONG:
“Food Folks and Assfucking”
“Bada ba ba Bonor.”
“I’m lovin’ him.”
“Do you believe in Magic, buttsecks?”
“Did somebody say salad tossing?”
“Its what we eat and who we fuck.”
Whiskeybaby: From McDonalds’ inflammatory letter (or should we call it a manifesto?):
“We treat our employees and our customers with respect and dignity, regardless of their ethnicity, religious beliefs, sexual orientation or other factors.”
Can you believe that?! It’s practically written in the blood of innocents.
Cripes if they’re unhappy with the gay clown, wait until they wake up with that freak with the King Mask in their bed!
tunamelt:
wait…i’m in nj and see those ads all the time, but i’ve
never seen a sonic either.
do they really exist? are you sure they’re not gay?
They’re just assuming McDonald’s is pro-gay because of their obviously gay frontman, Grimace. Kind of like Fox News with Shep Smith.
from here to shining sea i will drive through every mcdonalds and buy a pie and a shake and an extra large fry just to thank them for supporting the gay lifestyle and pissing off the fundies
tunamelt:
Welcome to the jungle
We got fun ‘n’ games
We got everything you want
Honey we know the names
We are the people that can find
Whatever you may need
If you got the money honey
We got your disease
Thanks. Now I have visions of reproducing fundies appearing in my mind with Guns N Roses as a sound track.
i love that these dickbags are weighing their “morals” against stuffing their inbred faces with fried animal carcass.
I’ve been trying to leave a comment here but I keep laughing too hard.
Alright, I’m re-scheduling my evening commute tonight to make sure I hit up McDonalds.
I am informing all my children an gran children to Boycott Mcdonalds, that is a total of 22 people”
Jesus Christ, this is the freakin personification of the opening 20 minutes of Idiocracy. …
Quick Wonketeers, start breeding. The future depends on it!
I always wondered what was in their milkshakes that made them so good.
Truculent: Gay Agenda Go Nuts (as it were).
fried animal carcass they’ll glad inhale at another non-fag food establishment.
ForTheTurnstiles: Probably hasn’t has much attention paid to her in a loooooooong time if this is what she worries about all day.
Bojangles? THAT’S NOT RACIAL TRANSCENDENCE!
tunamelt: Same goes for New York, actually! Which is weird, because they keep running these vaguely hipster mumblecore commercials that seem designed for Brooklyn.
Who else wants to pool all our money and open a chain of God-Hates-Fags Burger’s? If this website is any indication, there is a huge market for it (assuming that each post on that site reflects one family, and each family is composed of about 17 people, and each person in each family eats the amount of burgers of roughly 6 average persons).
ForTheTurnstiles: What you do with that e-mail address is entirely up to you…but, she posted it…
If I had a family of 5, and I was commenting on a Christian gay-bashing web site about how I’d no longer be able to take them to McDonald’s for dinner, I think I’d have to shoot myself.
Two all-beef cakes, special “sauce”, poppers, condoms, KY, disco on a rice queen’s bun…
I haven’t set foot in a McDonald’s for like, twenty years
and even then just to pee, I think I’ll go back to peeing there
exclusivly
Whiskeybaby: Here’s what’s got them all wound up
“The American Family Association is furious at the fast food chain for promoting “the homosexual agenda” by refusing to condemn McDonald’s Vice President of Communications Richard Ellis’ decision to serve on the Board of Directors of the National Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce (NGLCC).
As a corporate sponsor, McDonald’s donated $20,000 to the acclaimed business group that works to put gay business owners in touch with large corporations.”
http://www.gfn.com/recordDetails.php?page_id=19§ion_id=56&pcontent_id=226
How DARE they.
Keram2: teh_heysoos: Evil!
Godless Liberal *: Oh, In-N-Out is freaking amazing. It’s a religious experience, right down to the Bible quotes underneath the cups. But even better is Fatburger, aka In-N-Out for black people.
Tonight only at McD’s - Tossed Salads, 2 for 1.
And they’ll be sharing the recipe for secret sauce.
oh yeah, and the Fry Guys are gonna gang-bang Mayor McCheese.
If they spent more time reading books and less time breeding, then they’d probably all die from head injuries, which is what God would have wanted.
Not only does McDonalds refuse to remain neutral in the culture wars - so that American Families and Republican Homosexual Congressman can make our Internets and The Google safe for democracy someday - but McDonalds also refuses to remain neutral in the gender war, the race war and the disabilities war? Or that McDonalds has a BLOG?!! http://csr.blogs.mcdonalds.com/ and http://www.mcdonalds.com/corp/values/people/diversity.html
YUK! and double-YUKKY!!
Can we please put a special punitive task on anyone who has more than three kids in their life? I mean, sure, the world needs more ditch diggers, but we have Mexicans dig our ditches, so what’s with all the breeding?
JeffGoldblum: We’d rule the Oklahoma fast-food scene!
I call bullshit. If these people have kids they will be buying the kids meal in less than a week when little Joshua and Mary ask them why they aren’t going to McDonalds anymore.
“Well honey, it’s because they support gay people.”
“What are gay people daddy?”
“Well, that’s when a man loves another man.”
“You mean like Jesus loves you daddy?”
“Well, ummm, no…not like that.”
“Well then how.”
“Ah…forget it, who wants fries and who wants apples with their happy meal?”
John “Noob” McCain:
“I wanted to leave a comment, but there is no way to type a comment in.”
Please consider the MORALS and FAITH of what made this country great.
Slavery and genocide?
It’s a sad thing when a company like McDonal’s cares more about supporting the gay life stle than Christian families
Chick-Fil-A will be more than happy to take your business. And your family might even drop a few pounds because the have the lowest calories fast food in the business.
I haven’t been this conflicted about picking a side since the Scientologists had a beef with the Germans.
I submitted this comment:
“Does this mean I have to stop cruising for sex in their bathrooms?”
If any of MacDonald’s army of IP lawyers is reading this, the “Boycott MacDonald’s” people are using your “M” logo, I assume without your consent. Unleash the hounds.
JeffGoldblum: Those seem like pretty reasonable estimates. I’m in.
jagorev: “punitive task”? it’s spelled TAX, you stupid obese breeder person.
FunkyPalmettoBug: Winner!
Their milkshakes bring all the boys to the yard…
Ooooh, looky:
“McDonald’s is only one in a long line of companies that have been targeted by the AFA. They’ve already boycotted Sears, Kohl’s, Kmart, Target, Old Navy and IKEA, citing the company’s support of “the homosexual agenda.”
So where can these brave Americans go to buy Twinkies, Bud Light, and Q-tips all in one place? (Where would Jesus shop?)
Grease….lube….makes sense to me…
For the uninitiated, a Sonic locater:
http://www.sonicdrivein.com/locator/viewSearch.do
If the burgers aren’t your thing, they got hot dogs and chicken (along with lefty elitist salads and such). They’ve got half-priced drinks in the afternoon, drinks that range from frozen fruit slushes to add-your-own-flavor sodas, onion rings from actual onions rather than those perversely uniform things that BK sells, sell breakfast all day, dispense ice cream in unconscionably large sizes, and the aforementioned, jailbait, skates and shorts.
RONALD AND EVE NOT BIG MAC AND STEVE!!!
But seriously, I’ve been boycotting McDonald’s for years because everyone else makes better food (although I break for Shamrock Shakes).
BobLoblawLawBlog: Don’t even get me started on the Buttburglar.
You forgot to include this gem:
“Even my gay friends admit that investing in a cause is not neutrality. You have become a standard bearer for one viewpoint.”
As you can see, using the “My best friend is black” tactic proves equally effective here.
itgetter: Ikea? Nothing says “gay” like allen wrenches.
AfghanVet: Man, it’s been a while, but I’m pretty sure McDonald’s doesn’t serve apples — unless said apples are deep-fried, salted to all hell, and picked off the dead carcass of an inbred cow at a high-density feed-lot.
Delicious.
Guppy06: None in Los Angeles. Nearest Sonic to LA is in Anaheim behind the Orange Curtain, second nearest is in Victorville, also known as the desert.
But there are like ten in Bakersfield. WTF?
They obviously have never set foot in a GAP, Bananna Republic or Crate & Barrel.
>>So where can these brave Americans go to buy Twinkies, Bud Light, and Q-tips all in one place?
Dunno, lol.
http://www.mcdonalds.com/contact/contact_us.html
Thank you for visiting McDonald’s website. Below is your email which has been submitted to McDonald’s Customer Response Center. While replies to this e-mail cannot be received, should you need to contact us again, please feel free to contact us through mcdonalds.com. Thank you.
Guppy06: Oh God yeah. The ones in SC were episodes of “To Catch a Predator”
But where does Five Guys stand on this important issue? Can the unwashed still safely eat there? (I’d rather they didn’t, of course - that’s one tasty hot dog).
Keram2:
It’s been part of their kiddie menu since SuperSize Me.
tunamelt:
Each time I’m in SoCal I have to go to In N Out at least once.
Canmon (The Inadequate) I, too, swore off the bastard clown’s food years ago, but tonite I may just take a spin through the drivethrough. Perhaps take several bags of those yummy fries to some sort of Bible Study and leave them hidden so that their scent wafts mysteriously through an open window tempting them all to the dark side..
teh_heysoos: ” I will also suggest members in my congregation boycott you as well. Rev. Jim Berlin Chillicothe Free Methodist Church Senior Pastor jberlin@we.rr.com”
”
” We will also let our mom’s group know of your decision and aks them to do the same. Sincerely, Karen Starnes Concerned mom kfstarnes@sbcglobal.net“
Greatest. Comment. Ever.:
“i think whoever made this decision is not thinking very far in the future these gays will not reproduce so this will hurt future sales and if you really want to help someone give the senior citizens a discount also children in gettos could use some free coupons or say the needy i was in a mcdonalds one cold morning having breakfast with my husband i looked over and saw this bum he had a cup of coffee with several pcks of sugar and creamer stirring it in , looking at customers eating wishing for food as i was leaving i placed a $5 bill on his table he said thank you mam i looked back he was at the counter ordering food please wake up and look around you there is need every where this man was some mothers child that had fallen by the way side it is our duty to help such as these helen humphries 1114 4th st se red bay al 35582 e mail address mrhmh@bellsouth.net”
Yes, McDonald’s, take advice from Helen, the woman who doesn’t realize that giving out your home/e-mail address on the internet could be a problem.
This is all part of the homosexual agenda. Make brother-daddy and sister-mama stop eating at McDonalds in order to gay-poison them with arugula and rabe.
I think the site is going to get burned for using the McD logo - just a thought…
Contacting the American Family Association: http://faq.afa.net/
And get a download of their “dirty companies” dossier…”Which companies support anti-family values”:
Anheuser-Busch! (Cindypants, hold on to those shares!), Comcast, Disney, Johnson & Johnson (put down that baby oil, Senator, and come back to the stall!), Viacom, Nike, Merrill Lynch, Ford, Aetna….on and on and on.
Huzzah for “Abortion; Gay, Lesbian, Bi-Sexual, Transgender Agenda; Pornography, Alcohol, Tobacco, Gambling, Anti-Family Media and Affirmative Values!! DOWN with breeding, inbreeding, picnics, barbecues, flag waving and voting! BOO!!
ThomasAllen: I read that as “arugula and rape.”
Too bad Jerry Falwell’s not around to take the lead on this. Just think what he’d make of the Hamburgler. A little man with a funny accent & poor command of the English language (clearly Mexican) burgling America’s beef…?
Ronald should be neutral.
Tis true, Batshit Crazy….tis true…
I wanted to leave a comment, but there is no way to type a comment in.
these fuckers actually think gay people eat McDonald’s? how quaint.
Didn’t their Jeebus tell them not to eat shellfish or wear clothing made from two different fibers, as well as hating on “teh gayz?”
btw, why is everyone going to Burger King? Isn’t he like a pedophile or….
Never mind.
Could we get McDonalds to actually post the homosexual agenda someplace? I can never find the damn thing.
I’m just surprised to hear that McDonalds could be referred to as an “eatery”. That’s just sick.
I always thought those golden arches looked a bit like a bum to me.
And it wasn’t really a Happy meal was it? Was it a Gay Meal?
>>Could we get McDonalds to actually post the homosexual agenda someplace?
1. Eat delicious McDonalds hamburgers.
2. Eat delicious McDonalds employees.
3. Rinse.
4. Repeat if necessary.
I’m hungry after reading all these comments…
Keram2: Nope, they do. It’s a kid’s meal option. Apple slices instead of fries.
the horrible, horrible homosexual agenda raises it grim visage. will it never end? think of the children. and how close-minded McD’s leadership is. But, just for a minute, what is the homosexual agenda — i probably just didn’t get the memo. But then, I missed out on what the heterosexual agenda is as well. And what black/white folks want anyway. no one tells me a gd thing.
What a fantastic website. It’s tough to pick a favorite comment, but it’s hard to beat “I wanted to leave a comment, but there is no way to type a comment in.” They should organize a march on the Capitol.
I’m trying to picture the authors of the bible having a committee meeting about how the homosexual agenda will impact fast food choices in the future. I drink the coffee from there, I’ve unfortunately read the nutritional info and can’t rationalize eating much else. Last week they forgot to put any milk in a latte. But if it pisses of the fundies, I’ll happily stifle my elitism and drink a black latte.
Count me in as having some McDonalds on the way home!
I had to try and leave something but I don’t think it will make the page:
“McDonalds, I will no longer eat your amazingly yummo straight sex fuel until you stop supporting the gay agenda to be able to see hospitalized partners and share medical benfits. Until the McDonalds corporation sees that letting people who like people with the same girl/boy parts live normal lives is sick, evil and wrong I will use all the money I used to spend on your food to buy Truck Nutz and Wendy’s food. Old Dave Thomas may have been a creepy old man but at least he wasn’t down with heine pounding. Yea-Haw. McCain 2008!!!”
If these people do not eat at McDicks, how will they ever get enough proties to continue popping out half-wit waterheads with their siblings? Why, they have cut off their noses to spite their faces.
AhojChris: Same problem, which is why you must go here:
http://sfbay.craigslist.org/sfc/clt/756244827.html
Oscar Folsom Cleveland: Can we get a list of companies the AFA approves of, for us socialist faggot Wonketteers to boycott?
Just once, just once I want a company like McDonalds to stand up to these people, a la South Park, and tell them to go fuck themselves.
I swear their stock would increase 20% in a day and the lines the next day would be around the block.
And, yeah, I can’t really stand entering a McDonald’s anymore (living in NYC has spoiled me for fast, convenient, tasty food options), but I’ll drop by on the way home today and pick up one of those “southern-style” chicken sammiches they’ve been advertising. It’s the least I can do to advance the destruction of civilization.
When exactly was it that the people who didn’t know nuthin’ suddenly determined that the nuthin’ that they knew was *somethin’*?
Oh Jesus, John Waters was a goddamn GENIUS.
What? This didn’t immediately bring up Pecker, and his opening at the local eatery full of shots of men kissing and stuff? Said the patron, “c’mon honey! Let’s go eat somewhere where they don’t serve GAY milkshakes!” Or something.
That, plus the gratuitous teabagging, the man-hating lesbian stripper, and the important lesson that Pubic Hair Causes Crime. Man, these people brought back some fond memories.
Full of Grace!
weirdiowasculpture:
Step One: decades of ignorant wingnuts persecuting you and lack of equal access to rights and services.
Step Two: ????????
Step Three: Profit
That or being really amazingly more fashionable and fierce than my pudgy ass.
Either way, they don’t deserve Ronald’s love.
Great, now McDonald’s is going to be a breeding ground for emaciated gay atheists.
Another favorite:
“I am appaulled at your support for such action and will now have all family members and church associates (about 5000 of us) to boycott all eating at McDonalds until it hurts your position financially and you change your direction just as we did with Ford Motor Company recently. We will ’show you’ who has the ‘majority oppinion’ on this issue in America Today!!!”
Look out McDonalds, these people took down Ford!
i blame those nasty old hell’s angels
Uncle Al: wiser words have never been spoken. best quote of the day!
“Made With 100% Man-Meat.”
OK, I signed the petition (I generally sign all petitions). Where can I see my name? Where’s the list?
Dear Ronald McDonald:
I will never, ever, never, nevr evernevevevever evr evr allos me, my 6 kids or their kids to eat at mcdonalds UNTIL YOU STOP SUPPORTNG TEH GAY LIFESTYLE Jesus commands that we live moral lives and save marriage for proper biological needs. i will PRAY FOR YOU AND HELP YOU TO SEE WHY THIS IS WRONG BUT INTILL YOU STO I CANNOT EAT AT YOUR RESTARANTS AN WILL GO TO IHOP RIGNT NEXT - SINCERLY: A. BITTER, WEST VIRGINIA
Elitist Republican Tard: And all this time I thought it was incompetent management, rising oil prices, a consumer credit crunch, and poorly designed cars that did Ford in. But no, it was the Christurds all along. Their power is nearly limitless.
DEAR MCDONALDS. YOU SERVE YOUR HAMBURGERS ON BUNS. “BUNS” IS SLANG FOR A MAN’S BUTT. GAY MEN HAVE BUTT SEX. THE BIBLE SAYS THIS IS WRONG. YOU DIRTY BASTARDS. PS- BIG SALE ON TRUCK NUTZ.
magic titty: You should visit the McDonalds on 17th street anytime after 1am on the weekend, you won’t soon forget it - I promise.
Oscar Folsom Cleveland:
I tried to look through the dirty company list but I just don’t have enopugh energy to deal with 62 pages of stupidity laced craze today.
“I wanted to leave a comment, but there is no way to type a comment in.”
Is this going to be this week’s “I am familiar with all internet traditions”?
As a lean and toned gay male- I think this is awesome that all these Christians wanna get in shape but use Jesus vs. Gays vs. McDonald’s to do it. That’s a nice twist. Now all the fat Christians will finally thank the “in shape” gay people. Finally-some gratitude!
Maj. Major Major Major:
Ok, hillarious.
Just think, if America continues on a path of acceptance, equal rights, and progress, the Wingnuts may starve to death within our lifetime. Huzzah!
Ahh, the queer debate rears it’s ugly head once again…. how long before it hijacks the general election debates? It’s time to punch another hole in the bible belt.
on the plus side, maybe those fatasfuck huckabee boys will finally lose some weight.
Guppy06: Word. QED.
“Individually, we are weak, like a single twig. But as a bundle, we form a mighty faggot. [a dictionary definition of "faggot" appears at the bottom of the screen.]“
“Verily, I say unto you, bendeth over under the Golden Arches, and know not the Lord! By his rod and staff shall he chastise you cubit-length strokes!”
–Coprolytes 10:69-72
4tehlulz: No, that was Dave Thomas.
And another thing: are golden archers the ones that are into golden showers? Just asking.
ToDamPrivilege: They will always hate the gays.
these commenters realize that, by seriously discussing McDonald’s, now everyone knows they’re poor, right? have they no shame?
additionally, I resent your relating Wendy’s to the other fast food chains. they offer baked potatoes.
Do their comments allow you to post pictures? I should comment with a picture of me giving the AFA the finger while eating a Big Mac.
those commenters realize that, by seriously discussing McDonald’s, now everyone knows they’re poor, right? have they no shame?
additionally, I resent your relating Wendy’s to the other fast food chains. they offer baked potatoes.
Wast of time, if you ask me…I mean, look at teh gays…they are generally fit and neat and slim and slender, well groomed and graceful…there’s no fucking way they’re eating a Royale wit cheese–Vincent Vega
Will the homosexual persons get a free cup of coffee with their McMuffins and can that be handled at the drive-thru?
dagg…”those” not “these”. I didn’t mean to suggest that we, as commenters also discussing McDonald’s, are poor.
DP: True, although I have seen the rare exception, like a guy who runs a writing workshop. He has a muted flamboyance, but he’s redneck fat.
Okay… I’ll try again…waste of time, if you ask me…just look at teh gays… they’re fit and slim, slender and graceful, disciplined and aware, focused and thoughtful, health conscious…there is no fucking way they’re eating a royale wit cheese, lessin it comes with “secret sauce”
Vincent Vega
This explains why every time I go to McDonalds, I all of a sudden want a hot cock in my ass and cum all over my man-face.
Posted:
How dare McDonalds uphold principles like “the rule of law” and “all men are created equal.” Take that pinko BS back to Russia. Me, my 432 lb wife and 9 obese kids won’t be eatin at yall’s restaurant no more (unless its payday). I don’t care what yall’s “logic” and “US constitution” says, this country should be run the way me and the other 934 in-bred evangelical yokels in this country say it should.
Gee, McD’s. Too bad you think I am a hate monger. You were my first fast-food stop. I’ll find somewhere else. Not that I hate gays, because I love them and pray for them, some are such sweet people (like the gals next door), but to call us Christians hateful for what WE believe in is just WRONG! So bye!! The Lord bless you.”
So gay people need prayer–even those sweet gals next door. Sexism is so awesome right now.
Hmph. Methinks somebody cut off Rev. Wildmon in the drive-thru of the Tupelo Mickey-Ds. Either that or someone forgot to put the special sauce between his sesame seed buns.
Take a look at the NGLCC Partners: http://www.nglcc.org/corporate/partners
If any of these idiots know how to get on the internets, they’ll realize they also have to boycott Burger King, Pepsi, Coors Light, Albertsons, Cub Foods
Southwest Airlines, American Airlines, Continental Airlines, Avis
Office Max, AT&T, Motorola, Kodak, Intel, IBM
Aetna, Blue Cross of California, Johnson & Johnson, Merck, Pfizer (so stop taking those medications)
American Express and Capital One (let’s see ‘em stop paying their credit cards)
Bank of America, Wachovia, Century 21, Freddie Mac, Wells Fargo, JPMorgan Chase
Also, to all you Sonic-deprived Wonketteers, two words: Strawberry Malted. Muahahahahaha!
I also made a comment:
“There’s a BIG SALE ON TRUCK NUTZ. You know, FOR TEH GAYZ.”
It probably won’t make it.
be honest: how many people left comments including the phrase “Truck Nutz” or “big $ale on Truck Nutz”?
FunkyPalmettoBug: You got my vote for comment of the day.
starfisher: He prays for them nightly. Outside their bedroom window. After all, he needs to know exactly what sins they’re committing before he can ask JC to forgive them for it.
That, or the author is a she that just wants to see what an actual orgasm looks like.
Dear AFA,
My boyfriend has started watching a lot of movies with John Travolta or Tom Cruise in it, and he’s eating at McDonalds a lot these days. Should I be worried?
NebraskashireGentry: Baked potatoes with a dollop of nacho cheese.
Huh… I always thought McDonalds was always a champion of pedophile clowns …
I tried to leave a comment but am going through gen mod fat secret animal bits withdrawal and my 17 children need their insulin shots so maybe later.
Given the number of spawn these people have, they could outnumber us any day. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
This is sucks. I’ve been boycotting McDonald’s for years because their food sucks. Now I feel like I have to eat there…
I suddenly had an image of McDonalds corporate in a boardroom reviewing these comments and trying to figure out if this is a good thing.
“We seem to be a little more popular with the assfuck demographic, but I’m not sure how many burgers they actually eat, and I don’t think marketing will like the way they’re talking about Ronald. And are they serious about us needing to offer Truck Nutz as a choice in the Happy Meals?”
shortsshortsshorts: What could explain my fondness for rubbing cheeseburgers all over my hot naked body before jumping in the “PlayPen”?
I thought Bonjangles was something that happened in rest area bathrooms.
jagorev: I have so many questions for that commenter. Lets look at it again.
“I am appaulled at your support for such action and will now have all family members and church associates (about 5000 of us) to boycott all eating at McDonalds until it hurts your position financially and you change your direction just as we did with Ford Motor Company recently. We will ’show you’ who has the ‘majority oppinion’ on this issue in America Today!!!”
Why is “show you” in quotes? Who are we quoting? Of the 5000, what is the family member to church associate ratio? Did Ford actually change anything? Is America Today some sort of wackjob publication? Do they not have spelling lessons among the homeschooled? Are appaulled people for or against Ron Paul?
I like that the all talk like the travel all over the place. Let’s face it, the term Staycation was invented for those in the Value Menu economic bracket.
If they stop going to McDonald’s, they’re only going to get their kids laid-off.
My contribution to the site’s comment section:
“Why do the gayest fries always taste the best!!!!????”
Oh my God oh my God oh my God!
I just went down to McDonalds for a super-gay hamburger and what did I find next to the Nutritional Information (which lists all five-thousand ingredients for the French Fries) but a copy of THE GAY AGENDA!
Here’s what it says:
1) Equal marriage rights for all including hospital visitation and estate entitlement rights.
2) Buttsecks for one and all.
3) Nutz for every Truck.
Wow. Hedonistic sickos.
OK, I will eat McDonalds tonight to show I support the right to assfucking (not mine please).
I have carefully examined my choices, and have decided on the following meal:
Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese
Large Fries (4 ketchup packets)
Large Chocolate Shake
Doesn’t seem so bad, right? I mean, big, but it’s just one sandwich, a shake and fries.
Lets see… add this, add that… carry the one…
2460 calories
94 grams of fat (about .2 lbs)
38.5 grams saturated fat (2.5 grams trans fat)
2680 mg of sodium (2.7 grams)
1 heart attack
I finally created a wonkette profile after being a reader for sometime…just so I could post this gem I found in the comments:
“YOU DID NOT BILD YOUR COMPANY ON HOMOSEXUAL PEOPLE! IT WAS BUILD ON FAMILY VALUES! MAN,WIFE.CHILDREN!MOSTLTY CHILDREN! THEY DON’T COME FROM HOMO PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
I’ll just leave it at that.
I am boycotting McDonalds, too!
Beside the taste and the lack of nutrition, I didn’t like the way they handled my buns.
tunamelt: There’s like 20 in Bakersfield because there are hundreds in Oklahoma - and virtually everyone in Bakersfield is from Oklahoma. I know I was. Then I came back, through no fault of my own. Anyway, since Sonic is franchised, I imagine the Baker-Okies got lonesome for some “home-cooked” food.
I’m boycotting Big Macs because they have ground up earthworms in them.
I read it on the internet and the minister at the local church spoke up about it, too.
He said that ground up earthworms turn people teh gay.
By the way, those Big Macs sure tasted good, darn it all. I’ll miss ‘em.
wonknoob: Welcome! From this one person, thanks for taking the trouble. Terrific.
A long time ago in Houston at my favorite tacoria, Andy’s on 11th, there was a partially transgendered waitress we loved who was murdered by thugs like American Family because she was different.
Just sayin.
The Army was gay too until they adopted the ‘dont ask dont tell’ from priestsl
I’m having my uber fabulous gay wedding catered by McDonalds.
Nothing like a Big Mac wedding cake.
Does this mean I’ll get a cock ring and some poppers in my next Happy Meal?
The comments remind me of the Jimmy Dean Sausage Complaints:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4RNb3tt0LM
Gay day? No mention of Mike Piazza? okay, now it’s gay day. Have a gay old time!
wonknoob: Brilliant. I think there was an error with your cut & paste though. It said MOSTLTY CHILDREN when it should have said MOLESTME CHILDREN
Wendy is a lesbian. And so is Jack In The Box. the end.
wonknoob: Welcome, and thank-you.
Any company built on children is surely delicious.
Don’t know why, but I like this one:
“I wish that McDonalds had chosen to remain neutral. There is 47 people in my family.”
columnv: And that is why we need teh gayz.
Speaking of fast food: I am at a fast-food establishment right now (sadly - and puzzlingly - the nest of heathen liberals where I currently reside has discouraged McDonald’s franchises)… with my computer balanced on my lap… and these comments made me laugh so f*#%ing hard a minute ago that I had to dive to catch said ‘puter mere inches before it hit the floor.
That was a close call. You bastards almost owed me a new laptop.
So I did my bit to show support for our gay brothers and sisters today. My report: the Southern-style chicken is decent. Not something that would ever become a staple, not even really up to BK or Wendy’s standards for chicken sandwiches, but not a bad choice if you’re ever stuck at a highway rest stop where McD’s is the only option.
The fundies will have to take their business elsewhere:
Hold your pickle, hide your bodice
Special odors don’t entice us…..Have it God’s way!
Numbers 11:18
“Say to the people, ‘Consecrate yourselves for tomorrow, and you shall eat meat; for you have wept in the ears of the LORD, saying, ‘Oh that someone would give us meat to eat! For we were well-off in Egypt.’ Therefore the LORD will give you meat and you shall eat.”
I think all the good readers of Wonkette should be sure to sign the petition.
Signed,
Rev. Truck Nutz
deeznutz@yermom.com
Whiskeybaby: yeah and seriously, do you think they’ll survive five minutes in belgium without the golden arches?
GO My Children! See what the rest of the world eats and see how much your faith matters…
“I wanted to leave a comment, but there is no way to type a comment in.”
A gem. Just awesome.
McDonald’s has been promoting the gay agenda for a long time in those big pits of balls, which they conveniently call the “play area.”
I even found a you tube of “gay” children trying to indoctrinate another child into the “gay” lifestyle!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WY3yqUeT7bI
“Our prison ministry team (Kairos) no longer has its breakfasts at a McDonald’s restaurant, my wife and I drive out of our way to buy fast food at a non-McDonald’s restaurant”
The prison ministry team is suffering from buttsecks overload?
Jim, seems like the commenting was sparse on all the threads today except this one, and there are over 200! So I hope we get another thread on this, like, tomorrow!
For, behold, on Wednesday morning in the little city of Oak Brook, Illinois, all the good Christian right wing religious zealots who have been until now so fractured will all gather together in spiritual harmony to boycott MickyDees! So, Ronald McDonald succeeds in doing what no politician could do: unify the religious right!
http://www.earnedmedia.org/afa0715.htm
Oh hell, someone dropped the NAMBLA bomb!
“How can you sleep at night knowing that you support gay rights organizations like NAMBLA (that’s North American Man-Boy Love Association) when your business depends heavily on the partonage of children. How can you sleep at night. Have you ever witnessed a gay rights parade with all the disgusting gay and lesbian conduct?? Shame, Shame, Shame!!! No more McDonalds for us, our children and grandchildren.”
Shouldn’t they have mentioned the ACLU, too? I didn’t think you could mention one organization without the other.
Yay the story I sent to Wonkette finally went through.
But what if Jared from Subway is a homosexual?
hom-asek-shul. hom-asek-shul. hom-asek-shul. hom-asek-shul. hom-asek-shul. NIGHT TRAIN!
hom-asek-shul. hom-asek-shul. hom-asek-shul. hom-asek-shul. hom-asek-shul. COMIN’ ROUND THE BEND!
hom-asek-shul. RUN CHIRREN, RUN! hom-asek-shul. hom-asek-shul. SHOOT THAT BURGER, BUN!
Ron-Ald should be neutrel. Make him GO AWAY! Ron-Ald should be neutrel. Make him GO AWAY!
hom-asek-shul. hom-asek-shul. hom-asek-shul. hom-asek-shul.
Ron-Ald should be neutrel. Make him GO AWAY! TODAY!
How’s that? I practiced, and everything…got a sign…typed a comment…got my wife preggers…
If I only had something REAL to eat, I wouldn’t be going insane, being here, ignoring my tum.
(and Dr. Spaceman, so so sorry if your pore gran duncle missed a few.)
long time lurker, first time commenter…
so this is the story that pushes me over the edge? after everything? and everything else? six homemade wonkettinis and suddenly i’m a freakin’ pund-ant?! hell, yes…
what does jesus have to say about these people being fat, acne-covered, obnoxious morons? which book is that in? is there a psalm for that?
“thou shalt not eat greezy, spat-upon, mass-produced, hormone-injected ground up cow ‘parts’…” ?
p.s. i wanted to leave a comment, but there was no way to type a comment in.
p.p.s. truck nutz!… and also, walnuts. thank you.
WONKETTE ES BROKED
“I am so tired of having homosexuality rammed down my throat. It has already destroyed my family.”
“GOOD BYE to McDonalds. God IS still in control! And I can get used to BK’s breakfasts!!!”
“The Mac Attack has turned on me and attacking our families and faith. There goes my Friday Fillet 0 Fish stop. I hope my waste line goes down too. LOL!”
“I’m going to miss Big Macs and frys. Good luck with your bottom line.”
“I will not be making my usual trip to MCD’s for a coffee, cone, burger or drinks. Families not are your backbone which now has left you spineless!!”
“I will no longer patrnize McDonalds”
“Dear McDonalds, I am an average American red blooded male. I have had ENOUGH of Militant Homosexual expansionism, which is really a form of terrorism. I promise you to NEVER shop at McDonalds again, ever. At the heart of the homosexual agenda is an absolutist agenda that seeks to destroy any and all oppostion to thier perversion. You are on the wrong side. I sincerely hope you lose millions.”
priceless
Your boycott cometh too late, oh righteous lardbuckets. Verily ye and your household have already eaten of the gay-agenda burgers! Ye that said, “See, the butt-burglars remain without issue and bring forth no child” spake truly. But on the day that three, four, even unto five of your children come out of the garment-closet and move to the godless cities of the coast, shalt ye rend your garments and cry, “Why didst I feed them this tainted swill that belongeth before swine?”
I wanted to leave a comment about you soulless sodomites, but there is no way to type a comment in.
Perhaps we should not jest.
Back in the spring of 2005 the AFA launched a boycott against the Ford Motor Company in reprisal for Ford’s perceived support of the homosexual marriage movement.
It was so successful that now ALL AUTO SALES are down.
Well, it’s the middle of the day here in Australia, so:
“Thank you McDonald’s. Now I will save about $80 a week, or someone else will be getting it…”
I didn’t even think it was possible to spend $80/week at McDonalds. Also:
“I have a 2 year old daughter who was beginning to love your restaurant but now I will make sure that we do not eat at your establishment.”
What kind of a parent goes out of their way to wean their kid onto McDonalds? Also, it sounds like it was hard; my nephew gobbles that shit up.
Wee Mousie: But now the Fundies have decreed that you can buy Fords again but not Big Macs.
Jeez. I try so hard to do a decent impression of a semi-literate, gay-hating, paranoid, bible-thumping nutjob, and these people outdo me without even trying.
*cries bitter tears, then sodomizes a clown*
You’ve got to love a petition that asks you right up front, “Are you a pastor?”
I have to admit, it’s tempting to answer “yes” and give them my spam-trap email address, just to see what sort of outreach(-around) turns up.
I remember the year when McD’s launched the Big Mac.
Dr Barnard preformed his second heart surgery, the Beatles “Magical Mystery Tour” went #1, Leo Fender sold Fender Guitars for a buttload of money, and Hollywood Squares went prime time.
Oscar Folsom Cleveland: Dear Anheuser-Busch: For years, my family of twelve have been loyal consumers of your products. (Our littlest one is particularly fond of the Bacardi Silver, I’m a Natty Light kinda guy by nature, and we were all looking forward to the imminent arrival of the Michelob Dunkel Weisse.) Unfortunately, the American Family Association has just informed me that you are in fact supporters of the evil alcohol agenda. As you may be aware, alcohol’s legality belies the fact that it is one of our most dangerous drugs. I am shocked and appalled that you, who pretend to be a family-friendly corporation, have debased yourselves in this manner. Rest assured that we will be looking elsewhere for our alcohol needs in the future.
CometHasTheFloor: I answered yes
Well, I put in a comment yesterday, and it *still* hasn’t shown up. Hmmmm, somehow I think it never will. I’m sure it’s just an internet problem though, ’cause the AFA would *never* censor anything (/snark).
HeelingToPort: It’ll trash any comment that has more than one link in it.
jagorev: Didn’t use any links - just a satirical pro nut-case comment. Damn those religious comment monitors. Before you know it, the AFA will be trying to tell us how to think. Oh..wait…..
HeelingToPort: You were referring to the boycott McD’s site, right? They didn’t put mine in either, though I tried to make it loving and supportive (tee hee). Kudos to the parodies that did get in though.
Yeah, Oscar Folsom Cleveland: “I am so tired of having homosexuality rammed down my throat.” that has to be a parody, doncha think? Brilliant.
so…filled…with…RAGE… REAGAN SMASH!!!
sonic is heaven on earth! so terribly disappointing that you, Jim, think otherwise. so sad.
From their comments section:
“When I travel I look for a McDonalds for breakfast now I’ll go to Bojangles”
Them’s fightin’ werds!
My favorite:
“Dear, McDonald’s. Last week I ate a cheeseburger at your restaurant. If I would’ve known it was created by gay loving hands, I wouldn’t have purchased it. Don’t you guys know gays were behind the holocaust? First Jews, and now the family. What is next, McDonald’s? Are you going to help gays eradicate sand? WHAT WILL WE DO WITHOUT SAND!?!?”
Awesome.
nietzscheprojectile: Thanks for doing what I was not strong enough to do by finding the ten-whore diamond in the Ginormous Rough of Hate. Awesome indeed.
On my way to my threesome tonight (MFF) I will be making a pit stop for some nom nom McD’s Fries and a chocolate shake. I will eat the fries……and use the shake during the homoseseual finger and other licking good exploits!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Also, just wondering what the obesity rate is amongst these “protesters”??? I’d guess mmmmmm 90% and up.
nietzscheprojectile: What a friend we have in Cheese-sands! Cheese Sands love me, yes I know!
Wait till they discover what it means to have a whopper in between two buns.
Special Sauce. heh heh
Let-us cheese your Jesus clean buns. If this shit were any more gay, the RNC would be paying for it.
to Keram2’s “Oh come on. Ronald McDonald wears makeup for fuck’s sake. We’ve always known he pitched for the pink team.”
Clearly Grimace “Grim-ass” is waaaaay out of the closet, the Fry Guys are gayer than a purple teletubbie with a magic bag and the Hamburglar is like creepy uncle Chester that we need to keep away from the kids. Ronald is just a stupid clown which is bad enough.
Well, maybe these Christards will penance themselves to a healthier lifestyle and be less of a burden on our broken health system.
“From here to shining sea we won’t eat at another McDonalds!”
Notice they left themselves the option of going to any McDonald’s between Mississippi and the North Pole.
Keram2: I think you discovered the next James Joyce (see Molly Bloom stream of consciousness soliloquy in Ulysses)