Wonkette
The jury reached a verdict in the corruption trial of Chicago “slum landlord” Tony Rezko, the sleazy best friend of Barack Obama. Rezko was a prominent fundraiser for Obama back in the day, and even helped him buy his Hope Mansion in Chicago, and then they started dating, but Obama was too careerist commit to a gay relationship on the side. And that’s a good thing, because Tony won’t be around for trysts no mo’! He was convicted of “12 counts of wire and mail fraud, two counts of money laundering and two counts of aiding and abetting bribery.” But what’s the worst the judge could throw at him for such petty misdemeanors? Oh: “300 years in prison.” So what? Obama will pardon him in January, 2017, because why not? [Chicago Tribune]
BARACK OBAMA
I wouldn’t fuck that with Bill’s dick.
Maybe Tony can’t hook a big mansicle like the delicious Mr. O, but I have a feeling where he’s going they’ll plenty of interested eligible bachelors.
I love the Trib photo with his young mob recruits. Somebody’s taking a hit for this.
After that prison sentence he’ll be almost as old a McCain is now.
Hopey and Michelle look so pale in that photo. The camera settings must have been way off.
By November, Rezko will be a better-known name around the country than Clinton, 527s willing. To what effect remains to be seen - Barry has already thrown him under the bus ages ago.
edgydrifter: Overexposed.
That’s silly, everyone knows Barry’s best friends are Fidel Castro and Allah.
At least they found him innocent of the murder of Vince Foster.
happily for obama, the average american voter doesn’t have the mental horsepower or attention span for rezko to make even a shred of difference in this election.
Remind me again. Which one in the picture is the criminal?
REZCO, AYERS, HAAMAS, BLACK RACIST PAZTOR. WHAT NEXT OBOOMA?
WE WILL NOT LET YOU SELL AMERICA TO THE TERRORIZTS.
PATRIOTS FOR WALNITZ 08!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Some mustache jokes I stole from the internets:
1. “An angry mob is walking along the street. Someone yells, “Hey, let’s hang that guy with a mustache!”
Someone else yells, “Nah, let’s use a rope!”
2. “You know, except for the mustache, you look a lot like my mother.”
“But I don’t have a mustache.”
“Yes, but my mother does.”
3. Why do most gay men have moustaches?
To hide their stretch marks!”
Why is Rezko the only one not smiling?
graceless*: OMG you’re right. Even worse…WHERE IS HILLARY’S HAND?
ABC says she’s out Friday. Pop the cork!
“We make money the old fashioned way.”
Cicada: He-Shocker!
AudicityofHope: I think the flag to the left is the criminal.
Ahh, I’m looking forward to the afternoon of January 21st of next year, when the right wing will start going on about what a vast criminal enterprise the Obama presidency is and how they’ll need another hardy soul like George Dubya Bush to come in and clean up after he leaves. Actually, who am I kidding? Sean Assity is probably saying all that right now.
You know, Obama is from Chicago. And Al Capone was from Chicago.
When will the mainstream media cover this!
Hey, if you commit fraud using a cellphone is that wireLESS fraud now, or what?
Lionel Hutz Esq.:
Obama -> Chicago -> Al Capone -> Gangster -> The Godfather -> Al Pacino
Obama is really Al Pacino
So, I’m left wondering why, oh why, Hopey The Rainbow Unicorn wasn’t among the indicted, let alone the convicted.
Why, I recall being told by Tony “Tiny Trigger” The Tiger under one of his many guises, that the indictment was due to drop sometime in early March. ‘Tis now June. How could Tony be so completely wrong? [Rhetorical question.]
Likewise, the once-estimable Joe Cannon @ http://cannonfire.blogspot.com, keeps implying that the other mukuluk has yet to drop, and when it does, whooboy, Hopey’s toast. Then again, poor Joe has sipped the KoolAid once too often from the poison chalice and is now a mere ball o’hate for Hopey.
What’s the deal? When will Fitz find the balls to indict the next President of the Untied States of Amnesia?
How sweet, I almost forgot that Hillary was once a perky blonde.
Johnny_Zhivago: Obama –> Chicago –> gangster –> “Public Enemies” –> Johnny Depp.
Obama is Johnny Depp. Who else isn’t surprised?
Wait a goddamn minute!! That ain’t Rezko, that’s Jeff Gannon with a phoney ’stache!!
Canuckledragger: The fact that this video supposedly took place during the year Obama was elected to the Senate in a conference that Bill Clinton and John Kerry attended strongly suggests to me that it’s all bullshit and wishful thinking.
Now it all comes together. Rezko was born in Syria. He is not only a Muslim he is part of the Axis of Evil.
Why is that stiff placed between Bill and the broad? Is the main stream media saying that Hillz cannot control her wandering Arkansss man meat?
It’s as yet another (not so subtle) jibe against Hillz by the porcine, sexist, anyone-but-a-skirt-or-a-tacky-tacky-pants-suit for president or presidenta.
Fornicate them! If Hillz drops out, it will be because of the misogynistic male malfeasant media.
If such happens, I’m voting for someone who will extend the Iraquistani War until my great-grandchildren are moldy in their graves, who believes that dementia is a province in Italy, hates Food Stamps because they cut into lobbyist funding demands and won’t wear faggy crewneck sweaters and who called his wife a vagina [somehat reductionist, as French Existentialists might might say. But who the fuck believes mincing Bordeaux swillers?].
So there. Take that. The end.
AxmxZ: Obama -> Chicago -> Al Capone -> Elliot Ness -> Elliot Spitzer -> Ms. Dupre -> WHORE DIAMONDS!!
Barry is the ultimate Whore Diamond (in the buff)!!
Every Illinois governor has a side guy who’s there to do the dirty deeds and take the fall if necessary. Ted Samuels was supposed to take it for Otto Kerner, but the ol’ judge got too involved and wound up in the clink, too; ditto for Ryan, who everyone thought knew better. Rod B. knows how to use his Rezko’s properly, it appears so far. Let us hope that Barry did, too, because if Tony is going to roll over, he needs to do it now. There’s a reduced sentence and a book contract if he has something juicy.
Rezko is a piker. I’ll see your Rezko and raise you a Keating. Now the big dogs are running.
AxmxZ: i have no words.
but wait, i might have words!
and these were the words i meant to say before i was distracted by AxmxZ and johnny depp and public enemies:
IS THAT PINK THING A PANTSUIT OR A SUIT, SUIT-DRESS, SUIT THINGEE???
I spent the ’90’s in an elizabethean theatre vacuum… i do not know what the hillary wore in the ’90’s.
AudicityofHope: You nailed it. Barry is the Hope Whore diamond.
AxmxZ: YES!!
AudicityofHope: Or is it Whore Hope Diamond? I can’t decide.
Actually, let’s run through the possibilities.
1) Hope Whore diamond
2) Whore Hope Diamond
3) Hope-Whore Diamond
4) Whore-Hope Diamond
5) Hope Whore-Diamond
6) Whore Hope-Diamond
There you go, the Obama hexagrama, straight from “ItChing for Change.”
Call me crazy, but Hillary’s gunt is much less pronounced in this ensemble than the pantsuit. Mark Penn would have caught that but she likes chutzpah better.
S.Luggo: You have these moments of awesome Sluggo… Come back to ‘merica and stop loving the terrorists for gawd’s sakeness.
S.Luggo: That stiff in the middle? You must have been out of the country and missed “Weekend at Tony’s”.
ladymacbeth: You spent the ’90’s in an elizabethean theatre vacuum? However did you get all the popcorn butter, dust bunnies, and condom juice out of your hair?