Wonkette
George Lucas, who created Star Wars and Raiders of the Lost Ark three decades ago and has spent all his time since then trying to ruin them, says his new hero is Barack Obama. In Japan promoting the latest Indiana Jones movie, the Lucasfilm billionaire said he loves Barry so much because “for all of us that have dreams and hope, is a hero.” (?) Lucas says he’s working on a “prequel” about when Obama’s dad was a goat-riding archaeologist on his home planet of Tatooine, where he found a bunch of dumb CGI monsters from space. The computer program Jar Jar Binks will do all the acting. [AFP]
BARACK OBAMA
George Lucas To Ruin Barack Obama Story, Too
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Mee so Hopey! Mee-sum look for Veep!
A New Hope
The creator of Jar-jar Binks. Heartwarming.
Lucas is always looking for more stereotypes to mine.
The Empire Strikes Black.
Two words: “Ewok Celebration.” It only got worse from there.
And photo caption suggestion: “Works every time.”
I thought that the previous consensus was Jeremiah Wright as Jar-Jar?
Karl Rove for Jabba
This might explain the sudden appearance of a Bar Bar Obinks character.
Why doesn’t he dedicate himself to refining CGI porno?
…is there absolutely anyway we can get Michell in a Jaba the Hut slave girl outfit?!
Lando in a Daishiki
that photo reeks of backstage coke-fueled double-team on Carrie Fisher.
AngryBlakGuy: …and we can seal Hillary away in CARBONITE!!!
I’m willing to forgive Lucas just a little, for no better reason than the aggressive manbrace betwixt Lando and Han depicted above.
Actually, I’m thinking Chelsea as Jabba’s slave girl.
Will we find out in the end that Barack and Hillary are really brother and sister, thus making us feel dirty for hoping they would hook up?
I’m sure Uncle George can work in some bullshit about how Obama’s journey is not unlike any random archetype he once heard Joseph Campbell mention in passing.
Is Axelrod Lobot?
Somebody please send this story to the Secret Service so they may tackle Lucas to the ground and pry the script out of his hands.
AngryBlakGuy: Yes (in reference to Michelle)
weirdiowasculpture: No (lens crafters has free estimates)
ThomasAllen: …..who is the “us” you reference?
edgydrifter: Yeah, that looks like a Gardicil for Men ad right there.
…quick someone call Harriet Christian to inspect his light-saber, so she can tell us whether or not it is adequate or not!!!
I understand the e-surance girl turned down the role of Lotta Fachina.
Mark Penn as Jabba. Michelle as Leia in the slave girl outfit. Lanny Davis as the guy with a tail on his head. Hillary as the rancor beast.
I’ve got a bad feeling about this …
I have a bad feeling about this…
Paultardville: StuckBetweenStations: Get a room, you two!
What the fuck is with that quote??
Was he speaking Japanese and that was a translation? He sounds just like the beauty pageant chick from a year ago that made no sense…
Me-sa no unnerstand-sa!
Post-op cybernetic Ted Kennedy as Lobot!
Hillary shot first
Come on now. Wouldn’t you like to see George Bush end his term by having his face melt, his head catch on fire, or his electricity-riddled body plunge down a very long shaft and explode at the bottom?
Not_So_Much: Much like his scripts.
weirdiowasculpture: That’s going in the spank bank.
Possible ending: The pretzel introduced in Act One returns in the end as a humongous CGI prezel-creature, and exacts its inevitable revenge.
How about Jimmy Carter as Obi-Wan? I can see him standing on a mountainside above Denver saying,
“The Democratic National Convention. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.”
Help me Obama Wan Kenobi, you’re my only Hope.
Even though I practically live in Skywalker Ranch’s backyard, I may never forgive George Lucas for 6+ excruciating hours I can never get back.
WernerHerzogsBear: You sure you’re not talking about St. Paul?
We must be cautious.
MARCdMan: Those blaster props have a secondary purpose.
mothermaven: Never forgive, hopefully forget.
Shall we stick Cinn-A-Bon rolls to the sides of Michelle’s head for George’s sake?
Cicada: Meesa try…oh dammit, George!
But where does Billy D. stand? Who gets the Colt 45 endorsement?
WHAT??? No Darth Vader/Dick Cheney jokes?? Wake up, people!!!
hhhhhhhhhmmmmmm…. Colt 45….. is it 5 yet? What? 4:05. Close enough (insert sound effect of 16oz Tall Boy opening).
Dammit…..thanks for giving me the only scientifically valid reason thus far to doubt my support for Barry. If Lucas likes him, there’s something fucked up about it.
Any remaining respect I had for George Lucas was eviscerated when he had a cameo on The O.C. to plug his last Star Wars movie.
Gopherit v2.0: Lucas has already recreated the election.
Stig_O_Hara: I thought Vader == Rumsfeld. Or am I missing something? Peter Cushion?
Stig_O_Hara: Barack! I’m your extraordinarily distant cousin!
Ralph Nader IS the creepy guy in the black suit.
Sorry guys, I’m a sucker for a bad rhyme.
weirdiowasculpture: Chelsea as the little green thing that looks like Elmo + A Gremlin, Hilly as the blue elephant looking fucker, & Penn can be Jabba.
Lord Humungus: “How you doin’, Chewbacca?”
populucious: Darth Nader?