- OH GOD: Hillary Clinton has told the traveling press corps that they may sign up for travel through June 6 — three days after the last primary, when that gal is supposed to drop out and stop making white women hate Obama. Clinton spokesman Jay Carson added, “There are a lot of places for us to go between June 4 and November.” She is so, so taking this to the convention. [Political Radar]






What she failed to mention is that travel is via “the bull”.
Satan shall rise again, just you wait…
There are a lot of places for us to go between June 4 and November.
How about you go fuck yourselves…
The question: is she delusional enough to actually attempt a third-party candidacy? I say, yes! Yes she is.
I do wonder - and I mean this sincerely - at what point does the party decide enough is enough and start levying public reprimands or something more? Nancy Pelosi has started basically telling uncommitted House superdelegates to pick a side by next week, so it’s clear that the higher-ups are officially sick of her shit. But when do they actually DO something about it?
At this point, these embedded reporters start to envy David Bloom.
“There are a lot of places for us to go between June 4 and November”
Like Hell, perchance? Can Hell be on the itinerary?
There’s a disgraceful joke involving the difference between a blond and a washing machine that has something about one of the two not following you around for weeks after you drop off your load. I think there’s an analogy in there somewhere for Hillary.
she’s just trying to distract the press while she hand-chisels her face onto mt. rushmore
“why don’t you learn something about the mountain!”
Of course she’s got to keep running out the string. How else could the Clintons justify it to the sweet old ladies and hard-working white bitters when they need them to keep coughing up campaign contributions? She and Bill have to come up with that $20+ million somehow, after all.
…she still has a traveling press corp? Who would’ve known!
@AngryBlakGuy: Don’t be fooled. It’s just Gerry Ferraro after forgetting to take her Multiple Personality Disorder meds.
She’s like Ron Paul. Except her family is paying for her to run, where as his family is getting paid for him to run.
Everyone talks about how smart she is, but the ultimate Paultard outsmarted her.
I’ve said it before. Hils has become Spinal Tap. She’ll travel the country with her cavalcade of white bitter ladies and every stop will get just get worse and worse for her but she will be oblivious to it all until she sees the marquee at the some Buttfuck Midwest Ramada Inn.
“Puppetry of the Penis”
WITH SPECIAL GUESTS
“Vanilla Ice”,
“Steve Urkel”,
“Ralph Nader”
AND
“Hilarious Clownton”
after she loses the primary i think hillary is going to join the “lieberman for conneticut” political party and run for president.
@DanaPerinos:
http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1223/585671276_d943cd8ccc_o.jpg
“Facing an increasingly improbable candidacy for the White House, Democratic presidential candidate Sen. Hillary Clinton, D-N.Y., showed no signs of stopping on the trail in South Dakota and cited an old Arkansas, saying in an off-handed reference to her campaign: “you can’t tell how far a frog will jump until you punch him.”"
What does that even mean? It is as though she’s become Dr. Phil.
Well, you never know… Vince Foster died on JULY 20th!
I can go a lot of places between June 4 and November too. I hope it isn’t Canada because she threw the election over to McSame!
How about you go ….
Who knew Dick Cheney was in the Hillary Clinton ‘08 Travel Office?
@Godless Liberal: Nancy only knows 3 words to deal with situations like this: Sternly Worded Letter.
Hillary and her Hillturds: This season’s naderites.
Frog punching? Another example of the homespun folksy wisdom we’ve come to adore from Madame Bizarro.
HA HA!! I AM BACK TO MY OLD SELF AGAIN!
Is frog punching a fisting reference?
Seriously, what the motherfuck?
Not sure what everyone’s so worried about. Just watch the last 15 minutes of “Superman 3″, and you’ll know what to do. Now if we can only get Harold Wolf to ski down the Grace Building in a pink blanket…
only an elitist press member would follow hillary after June 3rd.
Please, everybody keep this in perspective. After all, John F. Kennedy wasn’t even assassinated until November. Don’t take that the wrong way now.
“you can’t tell how far a frog will jump until you punch him.””
Is frog punching like donkey punching? Do I even want to know what Hillary was talking about?
Where’s Lanny Davis when we need him?
It should surprise nobody that she thinks that the only way to get a frog to jump is to punch it.
The press remaining with her should signal their Hillary-fatigue by filing their copy in text message format, laden with heavy sarcasm, bored Teenspeak, and snarky emoticons. Henceforth they should find some juvenile, yet strangely witty, epithet for her. They should also ask questions about how she copes with constipation, flatulence and queefs on the campaign trail, and whether George Clooney will ever find true love. Of course this will fly over her head, because she has no social compass and is immune to embarrassment.
@ Godless Liberal: Unfortunately, I think handling Hillary is on Pelosi’s schedule right after “end Iraq War with mandate handed to Democratic majority in 2006.” Sigh.
Oh hi godless liberal so you got in, after all? AFTER ALL THE TRAPS WE SET?
I am posting a comment to see how it works, at the moment, in my elitist Firefox/Mac system.
@nowukkers: Hey! There’s no reason to bring queefs into this.
So, since Denton’s not breathing down your neck do you guys knock off at 4:30 now? Or is there just no politics today? Really, congratulations, though.
@Ken Layne: Deleting all the users and all the comments and moving the site to a server in Kenya might have been overdoing it a wee bit just to keep me out, don’t you think?
@ Harvey Birdman: No, http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=frog+punch - this is a frog punch.
Man she is viscious…
@ Self: … vicious.
/wander off to find my “hooked on phonics” tapes…
And I’m not suggesting that Nancy Pelosi is going to regulate all over anyone. Lord knows if we had to wait on her to get things done, we’d still be working out the finer details of the Louisiana Purchase. But if she is actually taking action (said action consisting of a meek phone call consiting of a lot of “please” and “if it’s not too much trouble”, but action nonetheless) then things must be heating up.
This is like when you’re at the grocery store and some kid is throwing a tantrum and pulling stuff off the shelves and taking stuff out of other people’s carts and everyone else in the store is ready to show their pistols if his mom doesn’t calm him down, and finally - finally - Supermommy turns to the kid and asks him to use his inside voice. And when that happens, you just know that if Daddy (whether I mean Reid or Dean or someone else here, calling any of those guys ‘Daddy’ makes me feel incredibly dirty) was there he would have whipped some ass. I can’t help but hold out hope that Daddy is waiting outside in the car, and he’s got his belt off.
frogpunch test:
img src=”http://www.frogstore.com/images/d_10378.jpg”
I am back!!
But I am also home on my nice, sane Mac. My evil work PC would not let me read or post on Teh New Wonkette. I am hoping it gets jealous of my Mac and so finally gives in tomorrow.
Hooray! I can haz comment!
Hillary’s pool reporters better watch out — this extension of bus sign-ups is probably the prelude to a Speed-style standoff in which Hillary holds a bunch of press folks hostage until she gets the nomination or her own island. Unfortunately, no one gives a shit about the media dead-enders covering her campaign, so this, like all of her plans, will also fail.
@Doglessliberal:
Damn you elitist Mac folk! Straight to hell! My office computer is absolutely terrible. Half of the comments are over where Dick Cheney is usually shredding the consititution and the ACLU saying that that’s bad for some reason.
and for a comment actually related to the post: if she causes a McCain admin to be inaugurated next January with her dissention-causing, party-shredding failure to face reality, I will…well, I don’t really know, but it will be REALLY MEAN.
@Doglessliberal,
I was on my work PC all morning and couldn’t do anything except look at Wonkette via Google Reader. However, some time in the last five minutes, it decided to work on a PC.
So it might work for you tomorrow?
Godless, now THAT is a great analogy.
@GodlessLib:If you’re waiting for Reid or Dean to play the “Daddy” disciplinarian role, you’re gonna be waiting a looooong time. They’re more like the milquetoast dads who tell their kids they better behave or they won’t get any desert… and then the little f’ers roll their eyes and get ice cream anyway.
@shortsshortsshorts: my work one is the same! All the comments are crammed to the left with the ACLU, so I cannot read, and I cannot post, either. I am really hoping the farggin’ thing gets over itself by tomorrow because my work day would not be the same without the tpnic that is Teh Wonette.
and @tunamelt: I really hope so. I missed y’all!
that would be “tonic”. I don;t know what tpnic is.
bye for now, folks…
Mr.Lieberman,meet your fellow Independent…
It’s working on my linux AND mac machines. Pure. Unadulterated. Joy.
@tunamelt:
Did you travel well through the wormhole? I hope your bread isn’t stale.
On the plus side, I like how at the end of the comments there’s a little “welcome back” slug in bold letters. Every time I read it I feel like “hey, I was just about to leave, but if that’s how you feel maybe I’ll just stick around for another drink or three.” So nice.
Come on, everyone knows you cannot have the ritual suicide on the same day as the final primary. Those things take time to organize and to get all the grape drink ready.
Are smileys turned on in Wordpress? Let’s see:
Oh, shit yeah!
@shortsshortsshorts,
I did and my bread is just fine! I had a conflict… this is the only site where I use this commenter name and I thought about changing identities but I feared it would be too confusing.
@shortsshortsshorts,
My bread is just fine, thank God.
Let’s see just what kind of smiley action is available.
:(|)
;*)
<3
blink
She blew Billy’s retirement on her Denver WCW Smackdown fight, feeding the media with smutty visions of her throwing chairs. “Seat my people…or else!”
McCain
Hillary
Barry
My comments just got about 10 times gayer.
Oh great, smileys work. I’ve always wanted to post to a board dominated by twelve year old girls. |)
@El Bombastico
teal is the new black?
@El Bambastico:
Hell ya! If the site doesn’t work right, YOU make it work funnierzz.
@tunamelt:No black dudes in WordPress. AngryBlakGuy will have to become AngryTealGuy.
Light teal? Like more sea foam green? Or dark teal? I can only do dark teal.
I thought I saw Lanny Davis and the NuTones at the Holiday Inn in Trenton last week?
Ooh, smiley faces, so SHINY
Where would smart political satire be without smiley faces, Lionel?
OOO with the site not working right I can PULL OFF REALLY OFFENSIVE SHIT like:
I really don’t think Hillary Clinton is going to win the nomination.
GO ME! ME WIN!
Hmm. How obnoxious can we be with the emotocons?
Testing in 3…2…1…
0=) Angel, :-t Angry, ~:0 Baby,
Bored, :-# Braces, Grin, =) Happy,
Happy,
Happy, <3 Heart, { } Hug,
Indifferent, X-p Joking, \VVV/ King, :-)* Kiss, :-* Kiss, =D Laughing out Loud, )-: Left-handed Sad Face, (-: Left-handed Smiley Face,
Sad,
Sad, :-7 Sarcastic, :-@ Screaming, =O Shocked, O-\- Smug,
Sticking Tongue Out,
Surprised, :-{ } Talking, (:| Tired, :-J Tongue in Cheek, :-& Tongue-tied, =-O Uh-oh, :-\ Undecided, **== United States Flag, :-E Vampire,
Wearing Sunglasses,
Winking,
Winking, |-O Yawn,Z Zorro
=/ Mad, :-)(-: Married, <:3 )~ Mouse, ~,~ Napping, :-B Nerd, ^_^ Overjoyed, <l:0 Partying, :-/ Perplexed, =8) Pig, \&&&/ Princess, \%%%/ Queen, =D Really Happy, @~)~~~~ Rose, =( Sad,
I want to comment on Hillary’s tenacity, but I don’t know how to make the devil smiley!
@Widtap:
I never thought I would say this, but these smiley faces are now starting to make me miss Gawker.
No, not really.
@Shorts:
And I don’t think Hillary is a very nice lady.
How do we reply to commenters here? And do devil smileys? >:-(
And…is there an intricate hierarchical system complete with friends, followers, and ho stars?
@shortsshortsshorts
My bad.
There is a codex of Worldpres smileys herer.
WIDTAP - enabling chaos wherever I go.
June 6th…6th…6th…
Hee hee! Hopefully we can have today and tomorrow to abuse the hell out of the smileys, and then retire them permanently and never speak of them again.
Okay, so what the hell is up with the quotation marks around my name? Whenever I see it I feel like the site is saying Godless Liberal (if that’s even his real name) says… and I do not appreciate the questions of my integrity one little bit.
“Godless Liberal”, if you may indeed be so called, you are a secret neocon evangelist and we’re onto you.
Oh, Jesus…who am I today? I meant *Howard Wolfson*. Instead I made up an entirely different hybrid caricature of a frightening Hillary-touting ubermensch. Somebody needs a nap!
Hillary’s March to, and Siege of, Denver will rank up there in destructiveness with Sherman’s March to the Sea, huh?
I vote for a Mr. T smiley:
http://i262.photobucket.com/albums/ii118/Tits_LaRue/ANIMATED/MR_T/mrT.gif
…and a Republican Sex Scandal smiley:
http://i262.photobucket.com/albums/ii118/Tits_LaRue/ANIMATED/FUNNY/ymca.gif
Or no smileys at all!!!
Yeah, these smileys are gonna be SOOO disabled tomorrow morning.
Hillary is going to hang on like Johnathan Alter’s Hairline.
Too obscure?
So i can’t leave messages, I blame clinton.
Well, sniper fire *is* Hell…
@RacerMex: it ain’t Clinton’s fault. In fact, you should call Clinton. I’m sure she will fight her hardest to make sure every comment is posted.
dammit, is this so-called “wordpress” eating my posts or what? I posted a Mr.T smiley -and- a Village People smiley that are getting less topical by the minute.
Too bad there’s no emoticon for frogpuncher.
As Scotty McC. says “permanent campaign mode.” Every day is Groundhog Day!
Well, okay.
102415: My password is also verrrrrrrry long, can’t be changed. Guess that means I have to stay on all night.
So what happens when we try to embed a YouTube video?
http://youtube.com/watch?v=76HcLEunsws
Oh. Nothing.
We’re like the pigeons in the old PsychI film clicking away for treats that won’t appear.
Here’s what WordPress says about HTML and commenting:
Allowed html tags
Not everyone is evil, but keep those who are in check by limiting which html tags are kosher on your weblog. The default html tags allowed by WordPress are a sane choice to let people use html in their comments, without compromising the safety of your data or server.
Apparently, though, they’re perfectly happy to compromise the safety of NOT THROWING COMMAS AROUND LIKE THEY’RE GOING OUT OF STYLE.
No! it works fine and LOL to you N/A.Where the fuck are the cat pictures?
According to the “emoticon dictionary” or whatever, this emoticon is “wow, man”:
8-]
The Internet Explorer on my woman’s laptop shows the ancient (yesterday) posts. This is like the fucking twilight zone. I just commented on something nobody else can see??? This is awesome.
PJ, My favorite scent. We will need gallons of that to mask the stink of the next few months.
Okay, I’ll stop. I swear.
Shorts, that is very cool. I’ve been trying for that on all my computers and found nothing in any browser. It’s the monkey brain waves from the DOJ when they were logged on.
@102415:
YOU MUST TRY HARDER! Break into a library, or steal a computer or something. It’s a fucking trip.
Shorts, it’s a very special episode of Heroes. You must be brave now.
I still can’t get here from firefox.
D-day started on June 6. She’s fucking INVADING EUROPE WITH AN ARMY OF CAT LADIES!
@shortsshortsshorts
That’s what I was getting earlier this morning. It bothered me greatly.
But it fixed itself, or something.