Wonkette

Hmmmm, how can we best imply that he wants to fuck all the white women...

Wow, they really got him there, didn't they?

Actually, we're liberal lefties, but, uh, we have to admit that these are pretty funny.

A clever tactic because the Democrats won't be able to make the same claims against McCain, who, with the exceptions of his stints in Andersonville and the Hanoi Hilton, has been a member of Congress since its inception.

That's the best they can do? Calling Karl Rove, calling Karl Rove, Code Blue.

Oh snap.

Barak, call me.

@PeeJay: Andersonville! Great, my morning laugh!! He does look good in that Union Blue.

See, now the nutzies know how to smear ya. Not so sure more holding hands and hiding under the table is the right response. [www.rollingstone.com]

One of them is of Obama next to the words "My liberal heart bleeds for you." That's not even really anti-Obama! I could send that to my wife in a non-ironic fasion.

@Outstando: The listserv they sent it too was "SecurityMoms-ALL".

That should cover 99% of the white women.

I will be using a picture of the Republican field at an early debate, featuring Huck, Keyes, Brownback, Fred!, WALNUTS!, Ron Paul, 9hou11iani, etc., when I send out my National Mental Health Day cards October 10.

I'm kinda dissappointed all the hillary ones are about taxes. you'd think they would have more amo than that - she's such an easy target. Come on RNC, wheres the conservative wit? Personally, i could have a field day with it.

Yeah, because 5 years as Texas Governor made Bush qualified?

Doesn't George W. Bush's complete lack of experience in Washington prior to becoming President of Earth undermine this argument about Barry O having "only three years experience", entirely? Then again, pesky concepts like 'precedent' and 'facts' never stopped the GOP from a good smear campaign in the past.

How naive of me. Nevermind.

Let's not kid ourselves, isn't the red theme really supposed to conjure images of hellfire and the coming Final War when Barry '666 Beast' Obama is elected.

Awww, I thought their argument was that he's too cute to be prezdent. Hearts and flowers and soft violins.

@Outstando: That could actually win him white, female votes...

Five years as Governor of Texas didn't make Bush qualified. Five years of speaking with Jesus made him qualified. That and dropping the "g" in verbs (prayin', Jesusin', worshippin', and draft dodgin').

Valentine from McCain:

"Hi, Valentine. Wishing you the blood-soaked, hideous fiery, cutting-your-head-off-with-a-hunting-knife, blowing-up-women-and-retards death of terrorist victory you will deserve if you vote Democrat. Cause you'll die. And be taxed. Lotsa taxes. - Love, John."

These guys are so unoriginal.

@Marinesquire:
But he ran the Texas Rangers! And not the one with Walker, the one that finishes at the bottom of the standings every year and only barely functions as a profitable entity due to public subsidies.

@flatlands: Plus, shit's going to make me rich. Young Obama lookalike + video camera + members only jacket = the beginning of my gay porn empire. We're filming in Hawaii. I could use a gaffer.

@Outstando: Gives a whole new meaning to "Obama Mama."

I don't know what briarpatch the the Republicans want to be thrown into. Kristol practically endored Barack today.

Step 1, base your entire political philosophy on claiming Washington is the problem
Step 2, take over Washington
Step 3, Get kicked out of office
Step 4, Claim Barack Obama hasn't spent enough time in Washington
Step 5, ...
Step 6, Profit!

Yes, but Barack has a 12" cock.

Or so I've heard.

So it would be a Happy Valentine's Day for someone, wouldn't it?

So he's bright, articulate, and now witty!

@BotswanaMeatCommission: I agree. But I'm afraid they're going to start sending us e-mails about Republismut.

The GOP actually paid for this?

Just keep referring to Obama as 'Blue State Bush,' he's inexperienced, running off of charisma and little else and he has a nose for coke and cooze. Keep drawing parallels and you'll decimate him.

@BotswanaMeatCommission: Replace that one with, "My liberal aborted fetus bleeds for you." and I think that you have a winner.

@ElBicho:
Yes, I'm sure the GOP will start referring to Obama as the "Blue State Bush." Probably using those exact same words.

@Outstando: Somehow I think it would involve the Wayans brothers.

The GOP painted the Obama a wussy shade of pinko commie.

@greatgooglymoogly:

Hahahaha. Nice work.

You know, that brings up a point...if the only sure things in life are death and taxes, it's realistic to say that Republicans are really just afraid of the inevitable. I mean, what's to worry about if the afterlife is really all about drinking scotch from a gold chalice while playing Yahtzee! with Jebus?

Hmmmm...have the republicans resigned themselves to a McCain vs. Obama race?

Sadly, that was the ugliest picture of Obama that they could scare up. He can wish me a Happy Valentine's Day anytime.

@PeeJay:

Wasn't McCain was captured by the British at Fort Washington in 1776, too?

@Serolf Divad: That's the best possible picture you could use. Well done, sir.

Doesn't making Obama all pink-hued just make him seem more caucasian, and thus *more* likely to appeal to the Republican base? Think before you Photoshop, guys.

And either they're saving their A-game for the general election, or the GOP's publicity campaigns are now managed solely by a mildly retarded eighth grader.

@Serolf Divad: Nice!

Uh, anyone else notice the resemblance? Slip a headless, Iraqi-life-less-valuable-than-American child into Mac's snarling maw and ...

...it's Cheney!!

@NotNotLickingToads: Good point. Isn't 'avoiding the inevitable' an oxymoron?

And if they use the verifiable fact that the End Days are Nigh to justify doubling the national debt, then why care about taxes?

Wow! The format makes everyone lovable!

Or does it?

@thejives: I just released a shotgun blast of OJ all over my desk.

@Baiowulf: That's hot.

Hooray for Republican humor!

A rarer sighting than the ivory-billed woodpecker.

@thejives: Cheney valentine reminds me that he can run for Pres and Dubya can do VP without a prob from the Constitution. Just thinking.

@terrymct: The 1st Congress wasn't until 1789, so I wasn't counting that one.

@rdm24: How quickly thou forgetteth the "Half-Hour News Hour." Get it? Naww, Rpubs go for performance art, like post-Dadist pufferfish Blimp Rushbaugh and queeny gender illusionist Anntichrist Coulter. Nothing explains Bile O'Biley. Even God gets hemorrhoids I guess.

Doesn't he have TWO black daughters?
Not to forget the fact that Iraq Hussein Osama is obviously a Muzzlem terrorist.

@HansDog: Good point, and Cheney does all his casual wear shopping at Lane Bryant, so in a way he'd be the first woman president.

Is it just me or has Obama been looking particularly sickly in the last few weeks? And he seems to have lost a lot of weight. I am worried all this talk about change is wiping him out.

Conservatives ... it's ST Valentines' Day ... Don't make me get Bill O' Rielly on you all ...

@Serolf Divad: Not the GOP, but maybe Hillary

@Serolf Divad: Isn't it comforting that "Blue State Bush" at least knows how to read and speak fluent English?

@Papi Bear: He's 'Barack' on the coke!

My first thought was that the RNC is freaking immature.

My second thought was that they have to aim low or their base won't understand.

My first thought was that the RNC is acting childish.

My second thought was that they have to... for their base to understand.

The Masai genome will out, you know. He's tall and skinny and probably lactose tolerant. I think the world will speculate about the length of his dick, but that's a good sign. We need some huff and puff and blow your house down foreign policy -- with a little Mau-Mau heft to it. Grimm brought up to date. Nobody listened to the little twerp-from-texas,no matter how much dick he was swinging.