Wonkette

Welcome to the first day of reckoning. The 3 of us Wonketeers got together last night and decided that today starts our our reign of terror for commenters that have been annoying us. After the jump, we outline their crimes against comment-anity and invite you to consider who else might need to go the next time we drink too much and gchat each other.

Our first doomed commenter, frinkahedron, has been banned for the following crimes: completely incoherent comments; annoying everyone else in a comment thread; poor reading skills; and repetitiveness. While we always enjoyed Nadine’s emails, the thing we liked most about them was that the editors could choose when to post them.

Our second, SwizzleStick, was chosen as a warning to the other Paultards around. He had by far the biggest hard-on for Ron Paul of any of the Paultards with commenter privileges and was nominated “for lame paultardian earnestness.” So look out, ‘tards: If you try to make a legitimate case for why Ron Paul should be president, you will die. And if you say something like, let’s see, “Ron Paul is the only real option, when you think about it,” you will die and be made fun of. Don’t like it? Take your proselytizing to Red State or some such crap. Oh… nevermind.

Our third, Rfkrfk, showed up out of the blue months ago, made a misogynist comment or two and then disappeared until yesterday, when he plagiarized a very bad and misogynist joke from the Comedy Central Roast of Pamela Anderson. It didn’t help him that it was directed at me. Although many other (remaining) commenters made it clear that they consider me quite horribly unattractive and unworthy of their attention, only one saw fit to go blue and steal a bad joke to do it. For the crimes of misogyny, joke-stealing and perennial unfunniness (and as an example to the other commenters that I’ve noticed tend to mine misogyny for “humor”) we bid you adieu.

There were probably other folks we banned last night, too, but we were all kinda drunk on gin and power and it’s just a little too easy for us to do. Feel fee to grovel, pick us apart, deride our decisions or nominate others that you feel ought to be spiked in the comments below but remember, like our government, we are watching.