Our thrilling write-up is after the jump.
George Allen’s feet, left, like ‘Live 1966′ best. On the right, Jim Webb’s feet prefer ‘Freewheelin’.” (Photo: AP)
On Iraq, Allen sounded like an idiot. Webb sounded reasonable-but-vague, which is the official Democratic Platform.
On “Macaca,” nothing Allen could say could make up for his complete idiocy in the video. And he still hasn’t come up with a coherent answer to the obvious question, “what does ‘Macaca’ mean?”
RUSSERT: Where’d the word come from? You must’ve heard it somewhere.
ALLEN: Oh, it’s just made up. Made up.
RUSSERT: You’d never heard it before?
ALLEN: Never heard it before.
WTF George you enunciated quite clearly and said it twice.
Also, as an apology for Confederacy-worship, “I grew up in a football family” is fairly useless. Yes, his father yelled at guys both black and white for a living. TOLERANCE!
On Webb’s “keep women outta my navy” remarks, he was just as inept as Allen. Tailhook as an “attack” on “the culture” of the Navy would be a shitty response if it weren’t for the fact that no one remembers Tailhook. And there’s no video. And, yeah, 1979 (or 1991 even) vs. last August.
Then came the Patented Russert “will you serve a full six-year term” question, and one of the most painful and pathetic dodges of it we’ve ever seen (just say yes, George, ’cause your Presidential hopes are DEAD IN THE WATER), and, finally, the clip we’ve presented above. Russert asks them both about their filthy, filthy addictions to chewing tobacco. Of course, Russert could’ve made it into a questions about just how Allen got ahold of an RJ Reynolds smokeless tobacco product that is not actually sold yet to Americans who aren’t Senators, but that wouldn’t have been as cute a way to end the segment. Still, chewing tobacco. We smoke like Laura Bush over here and we still find that gross.
Virginia, man. We just don’t get it. We wish someone would welcome us to it.